Frost on My Moustache: The Arctic Exploits of a Lord and a Loafer

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Macmillan, Feb 9, 2001 - History - 288 pages

Guided by the fastidious journals of an eminent Victorian adventurer by the name of Lord Dufferin, Time Moore sets off to prove his mettle in the most stunningly inhospitable place on Earth-the Arctic. Armed only with his searing wit, wicked humor, and seasickness pills, our pale suburbanite-wracked by second thoughts of tactical retreat-confronts mind-numbing cold, blood-thirsty polar bears, a convoy of born-again Vikings, and, perhaps most chilling of all, herring porridge. When he is not humiliating himself through displays of ignorance and incompetence, Moore casts a sharp eye on the local flora and fauna, immersing readers in the splendors and wonders of this treacherously beautiful region.

A deliciously and inexhaustibly funny book, Frost on My Moustache deserves to be placed alongside those by Evelyn Waugh, Eric Newby, and Bill Bryson.

 

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Contents

1
16
2
35
3
71
4
102
5
130
6
142
7
155
8
171
9
182
10
211
11
239
EPILOGUE
278
Copyright

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Page 6 - Si trigintis guttis, morbum curare velis, erras," gave the signal for an unexpected onslaught, and the twenty guests poured down on me in succession. I really thought I should have run away from the house ; but the true family blood, I suppose, began to show itself, and with a calmness almost frightful, I received them one by one. After this began the public toasts. Although up to this time I had kept a certain portion of my wits about me, the subsequent hours of the entertainment became henceforth...
Page 5 - Aosrilities, as they well deserved to be called. Then there came over me a horrid, wicked feeling. What if I should endeavour to floor the Governor, and so literally turn the tables on him ! It is true I had lived for five-and-twenty years without touching wine, — but was not I my greatgrandfather's great-grandson, and an Irish peer to boot ! Were there not traditions, too, on the other side of the house, of casks of claret brought up into the dining-room, the door locked, and the key thrown out...
Page 5 - ... of my host. I only wish you could have seen how his kind face beamed with approval when I chinked my first bumper against his, and having emptied it at a draught, turned it towards him bottom upwards with the orthodox twist. Soon, however, things began to look more serious even than I had expected. I knew well that to refuse a toast, or to half empty your glass, was considered churlish. I had come determined to accept my host's hospitality as cordially as it was offered. I was willing, at a pinch,...

About the author (2001)

Tim Moore is the author of French Revolutions, The Grand Tour, and Frost on My Moustache. His writing has appeared in the The Sunday Times, The Independent, The Observer, and The Evening Standard. He lives in London.

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