Review: The life I leadEditorial Review - Kirkus Reviews
A first novel about a closeted homosexual's pedophilic obsessions. Dave Brewer is painstakingly Middle American. A meter reader for the local gas company, he lives in Indiana, near Muncie, with his wife Tara and 18-month-old daughter. On Sundays he drives the bus for Faith Baptist Church, and during the week he reads the Bible and helps his pastor set up lectures and Scripture classes. Tara, meanwhile, has a wild streak and likes to wear exotic lingerie, but Dave is not keen on this sort of thing. His only real vices are golf, which he plays as often as he can, and pederasty--which he fantasizes about continually. When Dave was young, his teenaged babysitter Troy apparently molested him repeatedly, with the result that Dave's sexual tastes were permanently warped. Marriage has helped, but it hasn't kept him from backsliding. Recently, he met a young boy at the local swimming pool who reminded Dave of himself as a child, and he hasn't been able to get him out of his mind (""This kid named Nathan has become my only reason to live. There you go. Let's just lay it on the table""). Soon Dave is finding every excuse he can to go off with Nathan alone, even bringing him to his church as a potential recruit. Meanwhile, Dave's unpleasant old father Paul is getting on in years and declining fast, and Dave and Tara have to find a nursing home for him. Finally, he's placed in a decent facility nearby, but when Dave drops him off, he discovers. . . old babysitter Troy, who works there as a nurse. Memento mori, indeed! This ghost from Dave's past forces him to a kind of climax and an effort to incorporate his past history as a part of himself. Aimless, pretentious meanderings that would be offensive if they were more coherent.
Review: The Life I LeadUser Review - Benjamin Lettuce Treuhaft - Goodreads
This gruesome tale of man/boy antics and the violent neglect that engenders them has scenes that make you cry not only because you see what it's like to be fucked up by a pervert but also what it must ... Read full review
Review: The Life I LeadUser Review - Karli - Goodreads
This started out alright, and I was really interested in how the story was developing, especially as Banner dove into the psychology of adult-child sexuality/sexual relations. As the story continued ... Read full review
Review: The Life I LeadUser Review - Charles - Goodreads
This was a hard book to read, and that's not a complaint. It shares with Banner's even more wonderful short stories an unflinching, and unsentimental, attention to the sort of people that tend to get ... Read full review