How Not to be a Supermodel: A noughties memoirAN INSTANT SUNDAY TIMES BESTSELLER! *THE MUST-READ NOUGHTIES NOSTALGIA MEMOIR* 'Hilarious' CAITLIN MORAN 'Witty, gossipy, self-effacing and deeply nostalgic, this is a joy for all of us who survived the noughties but have forgotten quite how. Much more than the memoir of a fashion model, this is the rarely-told insider story of the most glamorous, grotty and downright insane industries' SALI HUGHES Join Ruth Crilly in this comic memoir as she teeters through the noughties and lifts the lid on her days as an international fashion model. Told with unparalleled wit and remarkable detail, this is a book for anyone who dreams big and aims high but never quite reaches their goal. At twenty years old, five feet eight and with boobs that were 'inconveniently fulsome', Ruth was not quite young enough, tall enough or waif-like enough to ever hope for a meteoric rise to supermodel status. And yet her sheer optimism and questionable grasp on reality led her to abandon her law degree and begin a career with one of the biggest agencies in the world. Follow Ruth through a rip-roaring, hilarious decade of not-quite-making-it as a supermodel. Fuelled by little more than cigarettes and the stress of her spiralling debt she criss-crosses the world in pursuit of fame and fortune. But how far is she willing to go for this wildly unrealistic dream? Bridget Jones meets the Devil Wears Prada, How Not to be a Supermodel is a time capsule of a book that dives into one of the world's most fascinating industries. Offering a glimpse into both the high glamour and juddering reality of a by-gone era, this comic memoir tackles the darkest of subjects with the very lightest touch and injects humour and a heart-warming honesty into a story that could have so easily ended a different way. |
Contents
The Walk of Shame | |
Wizards Convention | |
The Quality of the Foot | |
Tokyo Teena | |
Goodbye Moonface | |
Take Soda and Leave | |
Im Drunk and Im Not Wearing Knickers | |
Congrats on Australian Vogue | |
Her Face it is Wrong | |
Its the Bloody Teletubbies | |
Living Breathing Jackson Pollock | |
Our Experienced Yogi | |
Never Sit Down in Lingerie Darling | |
This is Not My First Rodeo | |
Tell Me Youd Love to Be | |
Kill You Stone Dead | |
A Thousand Unsafe Pins | |
Amazing Furrycollared Steamcoat | |
Filthy Rich | |
The Epiphany | |
She Has a Bleeding Anus | |
TooSmall Shorts | |
Lucky | |
SquaredOff Brows | |
Body Like a Turgid Penis | |
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Common terms and phrases
absolutely agency anyway arse Astrid babe beauty bin bag blonde bloody body boots camera Candice casting Chambray cigarette client coat Conan cycling shorts darling David LaChapelle Dean & DeLuca desk Diane door dress editor entire Eurostar eyes face fashion feeling felt Filthy Rich floor fucking girl going grungey hair stylist hand happened Havaianas head hell imagination jeans Jessica Hart Jude Law Kate Moss knew legs lingerie Loes London looked magazine makeup artist mozzarella Nadia Nancy Spungen needed never night noughties Paris photographer Polaroid pose realised Redditch Ruth sexy shoes shoot shot side sitting skin slightly smoking someone sort stay Stevie studio supermodel sure Tarek Texana things thought toilet Tokyo Tokyo Teena trying turned waiting walk wanted wearing week whilst window woman worry York agent