Page images

was an excellent good word before it was ill sorted : therefore captains had need look to it.

Bard. Pray thee, go down, good ancient.
Fal. Hark thee hither, mistress Doll.

Pist. Not I: tell thee what, corporal Bardolph ;-I could tear her:-I'll be revenged on her.

Page. Pray thee, go down.

Pist. I'll see her damned first ;-to Pluto's damned lake, to the infernal deep, with Erebus and tortures vile also. Hold hook and line, say I. Down! down, dogs! down faitors! Have we not Hiren here?

Host. Good captain Peesel, be quiet; it is very late, i'faith : I beseek you now, aggravate your choler. Pist. These be good humours, indeed! Shall pack

And hollow pamper’d jades of Asia,
Which cannot go but thirty miles a day,
Compare with Cæsars, and with Cannibals,
And Trojan Greeks? nay, rather damn them with
King Cerberus; and let the welkin roar.
Shall we fall foul for toys?

Ilost. By my troth, captain, these are very bitter words,

Bard. Be gone, good ancient: this will grow to a brawl anon.

Pist. Die men, like dogs; give crowns like pins; Have we not Hiren here?

Host. O my word, captain, there's none such here. What the good-year! do you think, I would deny her? for God's sake be quiet.

Pist. Then, feed, and be fat, my fair Calipolis: Come, give's some sack.

Si fortuna me tormenta, sperato me contenta.

Fear we broadsides? no, let the fiend give fire :
Give me some sack ;-and, sweetheart, lie thou there.

[Laying down his sword. Come we to full points here; and are et cetera's nothing?

Fal. Pistol, I would be quiet.

Pist. Sweet knight, I kiss thy neif: What! we have seen the seven stars.

Dol. Thrust him down stairs; I cannot endure such a fustian rascal.

Pist. Thrust him down stairs ! know we not Galloway nags?

Fal. Quoit him down, Bardolph, like a shove-groat shilling: nay, if he do nothing but speak nothing, he shall be nothing here.

Bard. Come, get you down stairs. Pist. What! shall we have incision? shall we imbrue?

[Snatching up his sword. Then death rock me asleep, abridge my doleful days! Why then, let grievous, ghastly, gaping wounds Untwine the sisters three! Come, Atropos, I say !

Host. Here's goodly stuff toward !
Fal. Give me my rapier, boy.
Dol. I pray thee, Jack, I pray thee, do not draw.
Fal. Get you down stairs. .

[Druwing, and driving Pistol out. Host. Here's a goodly tumult! I'll forswear keeping house, afore I'll be in these tirrets and frights. So; murder, I warrant now.-Alas, alas! put up your naked weapons, put up your naked weapons.

[Exeunt Pistol and BARDOLPH. Dol. I pray thee, Jack, be quiet; the rascal is gone. Ah, you whoreson little valiant villain, you,

[ocr errors]

Host. Are you not hurt i'the groin? methought, he made a shrewd thurst at your belly.

Re-enter BARDOLPH.
Fal. Have you turned him out of doors ?

Bard. Yes, sir. The rascal's drunk : you have hurt him, sir, in the shoulder.

Fal. A rascal! to brave me!

Dol. Ah, you sweet little rogue, you ! Alas, poor ape, how thou sweat’st ! Come, let me wipe thy face;-come on, you whoreson chops :—Ah, rogue! i'faith, I love thee. Thou art as valourous as Hector of Troy, worth five of Agamemnon, and ten times better than the nine worthies. Ah, villain !

Fal. A rascally slave! I will toss the rogue in a blanket.

Dol. Do, if thou darest for thy heart: if thou dost, I'll canvas thee between a pair of sheets.

Enter Music. Page. The music is come, sir.

Fal. Let them play ;-Play, sirs. Sit on my knee, Doll. A rascal bragging slave! the rogue fled from me like quicksilver.

Dol. I'faith, and thou followedst him like a church. Thou whoreson little tidy Bartholomew boar-pig, when wilt thou leave fighting o’days, and foining o’nights, and begin to patch up thine old body for heaven?

Enter behind, Prince HENRY and Poins, disguised like

Drawers. Fal. Peace, good Dol! do not speak like a death's head: do not bid me remember mine end.

Dol. Sirrah, what humour is the prince of ?

Ful. A good shallow young fellow: he would have made a good pantler, he would have chipped bread well.

Dol. They say, Poins has a good wit.

Fal. He a good wit? hang him, baboon! his wit is as thick as Tewksbury mustard; there is no more conceit in him, than is in a mallet.

Dol. Why does the prince love him so then?

Fal. Because their legs are both of a bigness; and he plays at quoits well; and eats conger and fennel; and drinks off candles' ends for flap-dragons; and rides the wild mare with the boys; and jumps upon joint-stools; and swears with a good grace; and wears his boot very smooth, like unto the sign of the leg; and breeds no bate with telling of discreet stories, and such other gambol faculties he hath, that show a weak mind and an able body, for the which the prince admits him : for the prince himself is such another; the weight of a hair will turn the scales between their avoirdupois.

P. Hen. Would not this nave of a wheel have his ears cut off ?

Poins. Let's beat him before his whore.

P. Hen. Look, if the withered elder hath not his poll clawed like a parrot.

Poins. Is it not strange, that desire should so many years outlive performance ?

Fal. Kiss me, Dol.

P. Hen. Saturn and Venus this year in conjunction! what says the almanack to that?

Poins. And, look, whether the fiery Trigon, his man, be not lisping to his master's old tables, his note-book, his counsel-keeper.

Fal. Thou dost give me flattering busses.

Dol. Nay, truly; I kiss thee with a most constant heart.

Fal. I am old, I am old.

Dol. I love thee better than I love e'er a scurvy young boy of them all.

Fal. What stuff wilt have a kirtle of? I shall receive money on Thursday: thou shalt have a cap to-morrow. A merry song, come: it grows late, we'll to bed. Thoult forget me, when I am gone.

Dol. By my troth, thou'lt set me a weeping, an thou sayest so: prove that ever I dress myself handsome till thy return. Well, hearken the end.

Fal. Some sack, Francis.
P. Hen. Poins. Anon, anon, sir. [Advancing

Fal. Ha! a bastard son of the king's ?-And art not thou Poins his brother?

P. Hen. Why, thou globe of sinful continents, what a life dost thou lead ?

Fal. A better than thou; I am a gentleman, thou art a drawer.

P. IIen. Very true, sir; and I come to draw you out by the ears.

Host. O, the Lord preserve thy good grace! by my troth, welcome to London.-Now the Lord bless that sweet face of thine ! O Jesu, are you come from Wales?

Fal. Thou whoreson mad compound of majesty,—by this light flesh and corrupt blood, thou art welcome.

[Leaning his hand upon Doll. Dol. How! you fat fool, I scorn you.

Poins. My lord, he will drive you out of your revenge, and turn all to a merriment, if you take not the heat.

« PreviousContinue »