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« Honeft Spec, Middle-Temple, June 24. · I am very glad to hear that thou beginneft to prate; and find, by thy yesterday's vision, thou art • so used to it, that thou canst not forbear talking in
thy sleep. Let me only advise thee to speak like other men, for I am afraid thou wilt be very queer, • if thou doft not intend to use the phrases in faį fhion, as thou callest them in thy fecond paper.
* Hast thou a mind to pass for a Bantamnite, or to • make us all Qikers? I do assure thee, dear Spec,
I am not poliihed out of my veracity, when I fub• fcribe myself • Thy constant admirer, 6 and humble fervant,
No. 561. WEDNESDAY, JUNE 30.
-Paulatim abolere Sichæuin
Virg. An. io ver. 5 2 ***
The dead is to the living love refign'd,
AM a tall, broad-shouldered, impudent, black
fellow, and, as I thought, every way qualitiied for a rich widow : but, after having tried my • fortune for above three years together, I have 110 • been able to get one single relict in the mind. Ily ' first attacks were generally successful, but always
• broke off as soon as they came to the word juttle6. ment. Though I have not improved my fortune
this way, I have my experience, and have learned - several secrets which may be of use to those unhap
py gentlemen, who are commonly distinguished by
the name of widow-hunters, and who do not know " that this tribe of women are, generally speaking,
as much upon the catch as themselves. I Mall lere « communicate to you the mysteries of a certain fe
male cabal of this order, who call themselves the ( Widou-Club. This club confifts of nine experien(ced dames, who take their places, once a week, o round a large oval table.
• I. Mrs. President is a person who has disposed r of fix husbands, and is now determined to take a feventh; being of opinion, that there is as much
virtue in the touch of a seventh huíband as of a • seventh son. Her coinrades are as follow :
II. Mrs. Snap, who has four jointures by four 6 different bed-fellows of four different fhires. She sis at preferit upon the point of marriage with a • Middlesex man, and is said to have an ambition of ' extending her potlesions through all the counties « in England, on this side the Trent.
« III. Mrs. Mcdlar, who, after two husbands and a gallant, is now wedded to an old gentlemen of
fixty. Upon her making her report to the club, • after a week's cohabitation, she is still allowed to • fit as a widow, and accordingly takes her place at the board. « IV. The widow Quick, married within a fortnight after the death of her last husband. Her weeds have served her thrice, and are still as good
« V. Lady Katharine, Swallow. She was a widow at eighteen, and has since buried a second « husband and two coachmen.
• VI. The Lady Haddle. She was married in the fifteenth year of her age to Sir Simon Waddle,
• knight, aged threescore and twelve, by whom the
had twins nine months after his decease. In the • fifty-fifth year of her age lhe was married to fames
Spindle, Líq; a youth of one-and-twenty, who did llot out-live his honey.moon. • VII. Deborah Conquest. The case of this Lady
is something particular. She is the relict of Sir . Sampson Conqueft, sometime justice of the Quorum. • Sir Sampson was seven feet high, and two feet in
breadth from the tip of one shoulder to the other. • He had married three wives, who all of them died a in child-bed. This terrified the whole sex, who
of them durft venture on Sir Sampson. At • length Mrs. Deborah undertook him, and gave so • good an account of him, that in three years time she ' very fairly laid him out, and measured his length
upon the ground. This exploit has gained her fo • great a reputation in the club, that they have added • Sir Sampson's three victories to hers, and give her the • merit of a fourth widowhood; and she takes her • place accordingly.
VIII. The widow Wildfire, relict of Mr. John • Wildfire, fox-hunter, who broke his neck over a six• bar gate. She took his death so much to heart, " that it was thought it would have put an end to • her life, had the not diverted her forrows by re
ceiving the addresles of a gentleman in the neigh« bourhood, who made love to her in the second 6 month of her widow-hood. This gentleman was • discarded in a fortnight, for the sake of a young
Templar, who had the poffeffion of her for six 6 weeks after, until he was beaten out by a broken • oflicer, who likewise gave up his place to a gentle
inan at court. The courtier was as fhort-lived a « favourite as his predeceffors, but had the pleasure " to see himself succeeded by a long series of lovers,
who followed the widow Wildfire to the thirty-fe• venth year of her age, at which time there ensued " a cessation of ten years, when John Felt, haber
• dafher, took it in his head to be in love with her, 6 and it is thought will very suddenly carry her off.
IX. The last is pretty Mrs. kunnet, who broke « her first husband's heart before she was sixteen, at I which time the was entered of the club, but soon • after left it, upon account of a second, whom she " made so quick a dispatch of, that she returned to « her seat in less than a twelvemonth. This young
matron is looked upon as the most rising member • of the society, and will probably be in the presia ( dent's chair before the dies.
• These Ladies, upon their first inftitution, re. ' solved to give the pictures of their decealed hus• bands to the club-room, but two of them bringing « in their dead at full length, they covered all the “ walls: upon which they came to a second refolu' tion, that every matron Thould give her own pic
ture, and set it round with her husbands in mis
When they grow ? maudlin, they are very apt to commemorate their « former partners with a tear.
But ask thein which of their husbands they condole, they are not able to tell you, and discover plainly that they do not weep so much for the loss of a husband as for the
's The principal rule, by which the whole society • are to govern themselves is this, to cry up the plea« sures of a single life upon all occasions, in order to • deter the rest of their sex from marriage, and in« gross the whole male world to themselves.
They are obliged, when any one makes love to a s member of the society, to communicate his name, 6 at which time the whole assembly fit upon his re• putation, person, fortune, and good humour; and • if they find him qualified for a fister of the club, ? they lay their heads together how to make him fure.
By this means they are acquainted with all the widow-hunters about town, who often afford them great diversion. There is an honest Iri/h gentleman, it seems, who knows nothing of this society,
but at different times has made love to the whole I club.
Their conversation often turns upon their former • husbands, and it is very diverting to hear them re' late their several arts and stratagems, with which • they amused the jealous, pacified the choleric, or ' wheedled the good-natured man, until at last, to • use the club.phrafe, They sent him out of the house with his heels foremost. · The politics which are most cultivated by this fociety of the Machiavels, relate chiefly to these two • points, How to treat a lover, and how to manage ra husband. As for the firft set of artifices, they
are too numerous to come within the compass of
your paper, and shall therefore be reserved for a I fecond letter.
• The management of a husband is built upon the ' following doctrines, which are universally assented
to by the whole club. Not to give him his head at
first. Not to allow him too great freedoms and fa• miliarities. Not to be treated by him like a raw
girl, but as a woman that knows the world. Not "to leffen any thing of her former figure. To ce
lebrate the generosity, or any other virtue of a deI ceased husband, which she would recommend to • his successor. To turn away all his old friends and ' fervants, that she may have the dear man to herfelf. To make him dignherit the undutiful chil. dren of any former wife. Never to be thoroughly convinced of his affection, until he has made over to her all his goods and chattels.
• After so long a letter, I am, without more ce(remony,
(Your humble servant, &c.'