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Har. Away! You do not know the sex: Her, Har. Come, brother, perhaps I may give you vanity will make you play the fool till she despises some comfort. you, and then contempt will destroy her affection Fred. I fear you have destroyed it for ever. for you—It is a part she has often played.
(Exeunt FREDERICK and HARRIET. Mar. I am obliged to you, however, madam, Love. How shall I make you amends for the for the lesson you have given me, how far I may rudeness you have suffered? Poor pretty cresdepend on a woman's friendship: it will be my ture! had they stolen my purse I would almos own fault if I ever am deceived hereafter. as soon have pardoned them.
Har. My friendship, madam, naturally cools Mrs Wise. The age is come to a fine pass inwhen I discover its object less worthy than I im- deed, if children are to controul the wills of their agined her.--I can never have any violent esteem parents. If I would have consented to a second for one who would make herself unhappy to match, I would have been glad to see a child of make the person who dotes on her more so : The mine oppose it! ridiculous custom of the world is a poor excuse Love. Let us be married immediately, my dear! for such a behaviour: and, in my opinion, the co and if, after that, they ever dare to offend you, quette, who sacrifices the ease and reputation of they shall stay no longer under my roof. as many as she is able to an ill-natured vanity, is Áirs Wise. Look'e, Mariana, I know your coca more odious, a more pernicious creature, than sent will appear a little sudden, and not altoge the wretch whom fondness betrays to make her ther conform to those nice rules of decorum of lover happy at the expence of her own reputation. which I have been all my life so strict an obserEnter Mrs WISELY and CLERIMONT.
ver; but this is so prudent a match, that the worki
will be apt to give you a dispensation. When Mrs Wise. Upon my word, sir, you have a women seem too forward to run away with idic most excellent taste for pictures.
young fellows, the world is, as it ought to be, very Mar. I can bear this no longer.- If you had severe on them; but when they only consult their been base enough to have given up all friendship interest in their consent, though it be never so and honour, good-breeding should have restrain- quickly given, we say, La! who suspected it? I: ed you from using me after this inhuman, cruel, was mighty privately carried on ! barbarous manner.
Mar. I resign myself entirely over to your will, Mrs Wise. Bless me, child! what's the mat madam, and am at your disposal. ter?
Mrs Wise. Mr Lovegold, my daughter is a litHar. Let me entreat you, Mariana, not to ex tle shy on this occasion: you know your court. pose yourself : you have nothing to complain of ship has not been of any long date; but she has on his side, and therefore pray let the whole be a considered your great merit, and I believe I may secret.
venture to give you her consent. Mar. A secret! No, madam : the whole world Love. And shall I! Hey! I begin to find myseli shall know how I have been treated. I thank the happiest man upon earth! 'Od, madam, you Heaven I have it in my power to be revenged on shall be a grandmother within these ten months! you; and if I am not reveng'd on you
-I am a very young fellow. Fred. See, sister, was I not in the right? Did Mar. If you were five years younger, I should I not tell you you would ruin me? and now you utterly detest you. have done it.
Love. The very creature she was described to Har. Courage! all will go well yet: You must be ! No one, sure, ever so luckily found a mass of not be frightened at a few storms: these are on treasure as I have. My pretty sweet! if you will ly blasts that carry a lover to his harbour. walk a few minutes in the garden, I will wait on Enter LOVEGOLD.
you: I must give some necessary orders to my
clerk. Love. I ask your pardon :- I have dispatched Mrs Wise. We shall expect you with impatience. my business with all possible haste.
[Exeunt MARIANA and Mrs WISELY. Mrs Wise. I did not expect, Mr Lovegold, Love. Clerimont, come hither. You see the when we were invited hither, that your children disorder my house is like to be in this evening. intended to affront us.
I must trust every thing to your care. See that Love. Has any one affronted you,
madam? matters be managed with as small expence as posMrs Wise. Your children, sir, bave used my sible. My extravagant son has sent for fruit, poor girl so ill, that they have brought tears into sweet-meats, and tokay. Take care what is not ber eyes. I can assure you we are not used to cat or drank be returned to the trades-people. If be treated in this manner. My daughter is of as you can save a bottle of the wine, let that be sent good a family
back too; and put up what is left, if part of a bot. Love. Out of my sight, audacious, vile wretches! tle, in a pint: that I will keep for my own drinkand let ine never see you again.
ing when I am sick. Be sure that the servants Fred. Sir, I
of my guests be not asked to come farther than Love. I won't hear a word, and I wish I may the hall, for fear some of mine should ask them never hear you more. Was ever such impudence to eat. I trust every thing to you. to dare, after what I have told you
Cler. I shall take all the care possible, sir: But
there is one thing in this entertainment of yours | all that her mother is worth. In short, I have which gives me inexpressible pain.
made a very prudent choice. Love. What is that, pr’ythee?
Cler. Do but hear me, sir. Cler. That is, the cause of it. Give me leave, Love. Take a particular care of the family, my sir, to be free on this occasion. I am sorry a man good boy. Pray, let there be nothing wastat. of your years and prudence should be prevailed
(Exit LOVE, on to so indiscreet an action as I fear this mar Cler. How vainly do we spend our breath, while riage will be called.
passion shuts the ears of those we talk to! I Love. I know she has not quite so great a for- thought it impossible for any thing to have surtune as I might expect.
mounted his avarice; but I find there is one little Cler. Has she any fortune, sir ?
passion which reigns triumphant in every mind it Love. Oh, yes, yes: I have been very well as creeps into; and, whether a man be covetous, sured that her mother is in very good circumstan- proud, or cowardly, it is in the power of woman ces, and you know she is her only daughter: Be to make him liberal, humble, and brave. Sure, sides, she has several qualities which will save a this young lady will not let her fury carry her into fortune; and a penny saved is a penny got. Since the arms of a wretch she despises : but as she is I find I have great occasion for a wife, I might a coquette, there is no answering for any of her have searched all over this town and not have got actions. I will hasten to acquaint Frederick with one cheaper.
what I have heard. Poor man! how little satis. Cler. Sure you are in a dream, sir :—She save faction he finds in his mistress, compared to what ; a fortune!
I meet in Harriet! Love to him is misery, to me Love. In the article of a table, at least two hun. perfect happiness. Women are always one or the dred pounds a-year.
other : they are never indifferent. Cler. Sure, sir, you do not knowLove. In clothes two hundred more.
Whoever takes for better and for worse, Cler. There is not, sir, in the whole town Meets with the greatest blessing, or the greatLove. In jewels one hundred; play five hun
(Exit. dred: these have been all proved to me; besides
SCENE I.-- A Hall in LOVEGOLD's House. don, sir,) that this hunks, my master's father, will
live for ever? And then, says I, do you think my Enter FREDERICK and Ramilie.
master will not remember his old friends! Fred. How! Lappet my enemy! and can she Fred. Well, but, dear sir, let us have no more attempt to forward Mariana's marriage with my of your rhetoric.-Go and fetch Lappet hither: I'll father?
try if I cann't bring her over. Ram. Sir, upon my honour, it is true: she told Ram. Bring her over ! A fig for her, sir! I have it me in the highest confidence; a trust, sir, which a plot worth tifty of yours. I'll blow her up with nothing but the inviolable friendship I have for your father: I'll make him believe just the conyou could have prevailed with me to have broken. trary of every word she has told him.
Fred. Sir, I am your most humble servant : I Fred. Can you do that? am infinitely obliged to your friendship.
Ram. Never fear it, sir : I warrant my lies keep Ram. Oh, sir, but really I did withstand pret even pace with hers. But, sir, I have another ty considerable offers ; for, would you think it, plot :- I don't question but, before you sleep, I sir?-the jade had the impudence to attempt to shall put you in possession of some thousands of engage me too in the affair. I believe, sir, you your father's money. would have been pleased to have heard the an Fred He has done all in his power to provoke swer I gave her:-Madam, says I, do you think, me to it; but I'm afraid that will be carrying the if I had no more honour, I should have no greater jest too far. regard to my interest? It is my interest, madam, Ram. Sir, I will undertake to make it out that says I, to be honest; for my master is a man of robbing him is a downright meritorious act. Bethat generosity, that liberality, that bounty, that sides, sir, if you have any qualms of conscience, I am sure he will never suffer any servant of his you may return it him again: your having possesto be a loser by being true to him. No, no, says sion of it will bring him to any terms. 1, let him alone for rewarding a servant, when he Fred. Well, well, I believe there is little danis but once assured of his fidelity.
ger of thy stealing any thing from him ; so about Fred. No demands now, Ramilie: I shall find the first affair: it is that only which causes my
present pain. Ram. That was what I told her, sir. Do you Ram. Fear nothing, sir, whilst Ramilie is your think, says I, that this old rascal, (I ask your par- | friend.
a time to reward you.
fidently affirm, it has been for her own: and I Enter CLERIMONT.
have so good an opinion of her, that the moment Fred. If impudence can give a title to success, you shew her it will be more her interest to serve I am sure thou hast a good one.
you than to oppose you, you may be secure of her Cler. Oh, Frederick ! I have been looking you friendship. all over the house. I have news for you which Fred. But has she not already carried it be will give me pain to discover, though it is neces- yond retrieval ? sary you should know it. In short, Mariana has Lap. Alas, sir ! I never did any thing yet so determined to marry your father this evening: effectually but that I have been capable of undo
Fred. How! Oh, Clerimont ! is it possible ? ing it; nor bave I ever said any thing so positively Cursed be the politics of my sister; she is the in. but that I have been able as positively to unsay it nocent occasion of this. And can Mariana, from again. As for truth, I have neglected it so long, a pique to her, throw herself away? Dear Cleri- that I often forget which side of the question it mont! give me some advice; think on some me is of: besides, I look on it to be so very insigni. thod by which I may prevent, at least, this match; ficant towards success, that I am indifferent whefor that moment which gives her to my father ther it is for me or against me. will strike a thousand daggers in my heart.
Fred. Let me entreat you, dear madam, to Cler. Would I could advise you !-But here lose no time in informing us of your many excel comes one who is more likely to invent some lent qualities ; but consider how very precious our means for your deliverance.
time is, since the marriage is intended this very Fred. Ha! Lappet.
Lap. That cannot be.
Cler. My own ears were witnesses to her conLap. Hey-day! Mr Frederick, you stand with sent. your arms across, and look as melancholy as if Lap. That indeed may be but for the mar. there were a funeral going on in the house instead riage, it cannot be, nor it shall not be. of a wedding.
Fred. How! how will you prevent it? Fred. This wedding, madam, will prove the oc Lap. By an infallible rule I have.-But, sir, casion of my funeral : I am obliged to you for be MrClerimont was mentioning a certain little word ing instrumental to it.
called interest just now. I should not repeat it Lup. Why, truly, if you consider the case right to you, sir, but that really one goes about a thing ly, I think you are: it will be much more to your with so much better a will, and one has so much interest to
better luck in it too, when one has got some little Fred. Mistress, undo immediately what you matter by it. have done: prevent this match, which you have Fred. 'Here, take all the money I have in my forwarded, or by all the devils which inhabit that pocket, and on my marriage with Mariana thou heart of yours
shalt have fifty more. Lap. for Heaven's sake, sir ! you do not in Lap. That is enough, sir :-If they were half tend to kill me?
married already, I would unmarry them again. I Fred. What could drive your villainy to at am impatient till I am about it.-Oh, there is no tempt to rob me of the woman I dote on more thing like gold to quicken a woman's capacity! than life? What could urge thee, when I trusted
(Exit. thee with my passion, when I have paid the most Fred. Dost thou think I may place any conf. extravagant usury for money to bribe thee to be dence in what this woman says? my friend, what could sway thee to betray me? Cler. Faith, I think so. I have told you how
Lup. As I hope to be saved, sir, whatever I dexterously she managed my affairs. I have seen have done was intended for your service. such proofs of her capacity, that I am much easier
Fred. It is in vain to deny it: I know thou on your account than I was. hast used thy utmost art to persuade my father Fred. My own heart is something lighter too: into this match.
-Oh, Clerimont! how dearly do we buy all the Lap. If I did, sir, it was all with a view to- joys which we receive from women! wards your interest It I have done any thing to Cler. A coquette's lover generally, pays very prevent your having her, it was because I thought everely indeed: his game is sure to lead him a you would do better without her.
long chase; and if he catches her at last, she is Fred. Wouldst thou, to save my life, tear out hardly worth carrying home.—You will excuse my heart? and dost thou, like an impudent inquisitor, whilst thou art destroying me, assert it
Fred. It does not affect me; for what appears is for my own sake?
a coquette in Mariana is rather the effect of Lap. Be but appeas'd, sir, and let me recover sprightliness and youth, than any fixed habit of out of this terrible fright you have put me into, mind: she has good sense and good nature at the and I will engage to make you easy yet.
bottom. Cier. Dear Frederick, adjourn your anger for Cler. If she has good nature, it is at the bota while at least: I am sure Mrs Lappet is not tom indeed, for I think she has never discovered your enemy in heart; and whatever she has done, any to you. if it has not been for your sake, this I dare con Fred. Women of her beauty and merit have
such a variety of admirers, that they are shocked | Mar. Have I not told you already, that I will to think of giving up all the rest by fixing on one. Besides, so many pretty gentlemen are continu Lap. Indeed you will not. ally attending them, and whispering soft things Mar. How, Mrs Iinpertinence, has your misin their ears, who think all their services well re tress told you so? and did she send you hither paid with a courtesy or a smile, that they are start to persuade me against the match? led, and think a lover a most unreasonabled
e creature, Lap. What should you marry him for? as for who can imagine he merits their whole person. his riches, you might as well think of going hung
Cler. They are of all people my aversion; they ry to a fine entertainment, where you were sure are a sort of spaniels, who, though they have of not being suffered to eat: the very income of no chance of running down the hare themselves, your own fortune will be more than he will allow often spoil the chase. I have known one of these you. Adieu fine clothes, operas, plays, assemblies; fellows pursue half the fine women in town with adieu dear quadrille—And to what have you saout any other design than of enjoying them all crificed all these?--not to a husband—for, whatin the arms of a strumpet. It is pleasant enough ever you make of him, you will never make a to see them watching the eyes of a woman of husband of him, I'm sure. quality half an hour, to get an opportunity of Mar. This is a liberty, madam, I shall not almaking a bow to her.
low you ; if you intend to stay in this house, Fred. Which she often returns with a smile, you must leave off these pretty airs you have or some more extraordinary mark of affection, lately given yourself.—Remember you are a serfrom a charitable design of giving pain to her vant here, and not the mistress, as you have been real admirer, who, though he cann't be jealous suffered to affect. of the animal, is concern'd to see her condescend Lap. You may lay aside your airs too, good to take notice of him.
madam, if you come to that! for I shall not de
sire to stay in this house when you are the misEnter HARRIET.
tress of it. Har. I suppose, brother, you have heard of my Mar. It will be prudent in you not to put on good father's economy, that he has resolved to your
usual insolence to me; for if you do, your join two entertainments in one, and prevent giv. inaster shall punish you for it. ing an extraordinary wedding-supper.
Lap. I have one more comfort, he will not Fred. Yes, I have heard it, and I hope have be able to punish me half so much as he will taken measures to prevent it.
you; the worst he can do to me is to turn me Har. Why, did you believe it, then ?
out of the house—but you he can keep in it. Fred. I think I had no longer room to doubt. Wife to an old fellow ! faugh!
Har. I would not believe it, if I were to see Mar. If Miss Harriet sent you on this errand, them in bed together.
you may return, and tell her her wit is shallower Fred. Heaven forbid it!
than I imagined it-and, since she has no more Har. So say I too; Heaven forbid I should experience, I believe I shall send my daughterhave such a mother-in-law! but I think if she in-law to school again.
(Erit. were wedded into any other family, you would Lup. Hum! you will have a schoolmaster at have no reason to lament the loss of so constant home. I begin to doubt whether this sweeta mistress.
temper'd creature will not marry in spite at last. Fred. Dear Ha et! indulge my weakness. I have one project more to prevent her, and that Har. I will indulge your weakness with all I will about instantly.
(Erit. my heart-but the men ought not; for they are such lovers as you who spoil the women.-Come,
SCENE II.-The Garden. you will bring Mr Clerimont into my apartment, if
Enter LOVEGOLD und Mrs WISELY. I'll give you a dish of tea, and you shall have some sal volatile in it, though you have no real Love. I cannot be easy; I must settle somecause for any depression of your spirits, for I thing upon her. dare swear your mistress is very safe; and I am Mrs Wisc. Believe me, Mr Lovegold, it is una sure if she were to be lost, in the manner you necessary; when you die, you will leave your apprehend, she would be the best loss you ever wife very well provided for. had in your life.
Love. Indeed I have known several law-suits Cler. Oh, Frederick! if your mistress were happen on these accounts; and sometimes the but equal to your sister, you might well be call-whole has been thrown away in disputing to ed the happiest of mankind.
(Exeunt. which party it belonged. I shall not sleep in my
grave while a set of villainous lawyers are divi. Enter MARIANA and LAPPET..
ding the little money I have among them. Lap. Ha, ha, ha! and so you have persuaded Mrs Wise. I know this old fool is fond enough the old lady that you really intend to have him? now to come to any terms; but it is ill trusting
Mar. I tell you I do really intend to have him. him: violent passions can never last long at his
Lap. Have him! ha, ha, ha! for what do you years. (Aside.] intend to have him?
Love. What are you considering?
Mrs Wise. Mr Lovegold, I am sure, knows the Lap. No, sir; but you have got something. world too well to have the worse opinion of any Love. What? what? woman from her prudence; therefore I must Lup. A wife, sir. tell you, this delay of the match does not at all Love. No, I have not yet—but why please me: it seems to argue your inclination Lap. How, sir ! are you not married? abated, and so it is better to let the treaty end Love. No. here. My daughter has a very good offer now, Lap. That is the happiest word I ever heard which were she to refuse on your account, she come out of your mouth. would make a very ridiculous figure in the world Love. I have, for some particular reasons, put after you had left her.
off the match for a few days. Love. Alas, madam! I love her better than Lap. Yes, sir; and for some particular reasons any thing almost upon the face of the earth: this you shall put off the match for a few years. delay is to secure her a good jointure: I am not
Love. What do you say? worth the money the world says; I am not in Lap. Oh, sir ! this affair has almost determie deed.
ned me never to engage in matrimonial matten Mrs Wise. Well, sir, then there can be no again. I have been finely deceived in this lady! harm, for the satisfaction both of her mind and I told you, sir, she had an estate in a certain mine, in your signing a small contract, which can country ; but I find it is all a cheat, sir; the de be prepared immediately,
vil of any estate has she ! Love. What signifies signing, madam?
Love. How! not any estate at all! how can Mrs Wise. I see, sir, you don't care for it, so she live then ? there is no harm done: and really this other is Lap. Nay, sir, Heaven knows how half the so very advantageous an offer, that I don't know people in this town live. whether I shall not be blamed for refusing him Lore. However, it is an excellent good qualion any account.
ty in a woman to be able to live without an es. Lode. Nay, but be not in haste; what would tate. She that can make something out of noyou have me sign?
thing, will make a little go a great way. I am Mrs Wise. Only to perform your promise of sorry she has no fortune; but, considering all marriage.
her saving qualities, LappetLove. Well, well, let your lawyer draw it up Lap. All an imposition, sir ; she is the most then, and mine sball look it over.
extravagant wretch upon earth. Mrs Wise. I believe my lawyer is in the house;
Love. How! how! extravagant ? I'll go to him, and get it done instantly, and then Lap. I tell you, sir, she is downright extravawe will give this gentleman a final answer. Igance itself. assure you he is a very advantageous offer. Love. Can it be possible, after what you
told [Exit. me? Love. As I intend to marry this girl, there can Lap. Alas, sir ! that was only a cloak thrown be no harm in signing the contract: her lawyer over her real inclinations. draws it, so I shall be at no expence, for I can Love. How was it possible for you to be deget mine to look it over for nothing. I should ceived in her ? have done very wisely indeed to have entitled her Lap. Alas, sir !•she would have deceived any to a third of my fortúne, whereas I will not make one upon earth, even you yourself: for, sir, dıher jointure above a tenth! I protest it is with ring a whole fortnight, since you have been in some difficulty that I have prevailed with myself love with her, she has made it her whole business to put off the match : I am more in love, I find, to conceal her extravagance, and appear thrifty. than I suspected.
Love. That is a good sign though, Lappet, let me tell you, that is a good sign: right habits
, Enter LAPPET.
as well as wrong, are got by affecting them; and Lap. Oh, unhappy miserable creature that I she who could be thrifty a whole fortnight, gives am! what shall I do? whither shall I go? lively hopes that she may be brought to be so Love. What's the matter, Lappet?
as long as she lives. Lap. To have been innocently assisting in be Lap: She loves play to distraction ; it is the traying so good a man! so good a master ! so only visible way she has of a living. good a friend!
Love. She must win" then, Lappet; and play, Love. Lappet, I say!
when people play the best of the game, is nu Lap. I shall never forgive myself ; I shall never such very bad thing. Besides, as she plays only outlive it; I shall never eat, drink, sleep to support herself, when she can be supported
[Runs against him. without it, she may leave it off. Love. One would think you were walking in Lap. To support her extravagance, in dress your sleep now. What can be the meaning of particularly; why, don't you see, sir, she is dress'd this?
out to-day like a princess ? Lap. Oh, sir !-you are undone, sir ! and I am Love. It may be an effect of prudence in a undone !
young woman to dress in order to get a husband; Love. How! what! has any one robbed me? and as that is apparently her motive, when she have I lost any thing?
is married that motive ceases; and, to say