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SCENE I.-A street.
Slip. The same, i'faith!
Mar. 'Tis he, as I live!
Slip. My friend, happily met!
Mar. My dear, I embrace you !--Not seeMar. I am sick as a dog of being a valet !ing you among the beau-monde, I was afraid running after other people's business, and negthere had beeo some fresh misunderstanding lecting my own
-this low life is the devil! between you and the law. -I've had a taste for the gentleman, and Slip. Faith! my dear, I have had a narrow shall never lose it, 'Tis thy own fault, my escape, since I saw you, I had like to have been little Martin ! Thou would'st always play small preferred in some of our settlements abroad, games; when, bad you but bad the face to put but I found there was no doing the business yourself forward a little, some well jointured by deputy, so widow had taken you into her post-chariot, and Mar. Did not accept of the place, ba ! made your fortune at once. A fellow of my wit why what little mischief had’st thou been at? and spirit should have broke twice, and set up Slip. Why, I don't know-meeting one night again by this time.
with a certain Portuguese Jew-merchant, in one
of the back streets here by the exchange (I Enter Slip.
was a little in liquor I believe-piping hot from Slip. Hey! is not that, that rascal, Martin, a turtle-feast) it came into my giddy head to stop yonder?
him, out of mere curiosity, to ask what news Mar. Can that be my modest friend, Slip? from Germany-nothing more, and the fellow,
(Aside. not understanding good English, would needs
have it, that I asked him for something else Mar. Ay, he's dying for the-twenty thouHe bawld out, up came the watch, down was I sand—that's all but since your masterlaid in the kennel, and then carried before a ma
[Going. gistrate--He clapped me on a stone doublet, Slip. Oh ! there you're safe enough; my masthat I could not get off my back for two months. ter will never marry Miss Stockwell : there hapMar. Two months, say you?
pens to be a small rub in the way. Slip. And there I might have rotted, if I had Mar. What rub? not had grcat friends; a certain lady of quality's Slip. Only married already. woman's cousin, that was kept by Mr. Quirk, of Mar. How? Thavies-Ion), you must know, was in love with Slip. Why, his father would marry him here me, and she
in town, it seems, and he--chose to be married Mar. Brought you in not guilty, I warrant. in the country—that's all. The truth is, our Oh! great friends is a great matter.
young gentleman managed matters with the Slip. This affair really gave me some serious young lady so ill, or so well, that, upon his fareflexions.
ther's return, there was hot consulting among Mar. No doubt, it spoiled you for a news- the relations; and the lady being of a good monger: no more intelligence from foreign family, and having a smart fighting fellow of a countries, hey!
brother in the army-why, my master, who hates Slip. Well but, Martin! what's thy history quarrelling, spoke to the old gentleman, and the since I saw thee!
affair's husled up by a marriage, that's all. Mar. Um ! a novel only, sir: why, I am a Mar. Um! an entire new face of affairs! shamed to say it: I am but an honorary rascal, Slip. My master's wedding-cloaths, and mine, as well as yourself.—I did try my luck, indeed, are all ordered for the country, and I am to folat Epsoin, and Newmarket; but the knowing low them, as soon as I have seen the family ones were takeu in, and I was obliged to return here, and redeemed my old master's promise, to service again.—But a master without money, that lies in pawn. implies a servant without wages; I am not in Mar. Old master's promise !-let me thinklove with my condition, I promise you.
Slip. 'Twas what brought me to town, or I had Slip. I am with mine, I assure you: I am re not shook my honest friend by the fist. Martin, tired from the great world--that's my taste now good morrow!-what in the dumps ?—we shall --and live in the country, with one Mr. Har- meet again, man. lowe-piping hot from his travels.
Mar. Let me alone, I have a thought-hark charming young fellow ! Drinking, hunting, and you, my dear? is thy master known to old wenching, my boy !-a man of universal know- Stockwell? ledge. Theú I am his privy counsellor, and we Slip. Never saw him in his life. always play the devil together. That amuses Mar. That's brave, my boy!-[Hits him a one, you know, and keeps one out of mischief. slap on the back.]-Art thou still a cock of the
Mar. Yes, pretty lambs! But what makes game, Slip? and shall we?-No; I doubt-I you in London now? whither are you bound? doubt that damned Jew-merchant sticks in thy Slip. Tu yonder great house.
stomach, and you are turned dunghill, you dog! Mar. Wbat, Mr. Stockwell's?
Slip. Try me. A good sailor won't die a dry Slip. The same. You must know his daugh- death at land for one hurricane. Speak out! ter is engaged to my master.
you would pass your master upon the family for Mar. Miss Stockwell to your master? mine, and marry him to the lady? is not that
Slip. Tis not above six weeks ago, that my the trick ? master's father, sir Harry Harlowe, was nere Mar. That! I have a trick worth two on't; I upon a visit to his old friend, and then the mat- know Miss Nancy is a girl of taste, and I have ter was settled between them-quite à la mode, a prettier fellow in my eye for her.
Slip. Ay, who's he? Mar. How do you mean?
Mar. Myself, you puppy! Slip. The old folk struck the bargain, without Slip. That's brave, my boy! the consent of the young ones, or even their see
[Slaps him on the back. ing one another.
Mar. I'm in love with her to Mar. Tip top, I assure you; and every thing's Slip. To the value of twenty thousand agreed?
pounds? I approve your fame. Slip. Signed and sealed by the two fathers; Mar. I will take the name and shape of your the lady and her fortune both ready to be de- master. livered.' Twenty thousand, you rogue !-ready Slip. Very well! rhino down! and only wait for young master to Mar. Marry Miss Stockwell. write a receipt.
Slip. Agreed. Mar. Whew! Then my young master may
Mur. Touch the twenty thousand. e'en make a leg to bis fortune, and set up his Slip. Um !-Well, well! staff somewhere else.
Mar. And disappear before matters come to Slip. Thy master.
I assure you.
Slip, Um! That article wants a little expla- | into iny heart, and if I consent to marry this nation, my honest friend.
man, 'twill be the death of me. Advise me Mar. How so?
then, and don't be so teazing. Slip. You talk of disappearing with the lady's Jen. Lud! What advice can I give you? I fortune, and never mention Slip in the treaty. have but two in the world; one is, to forget
Mar. Oh! we shall disappear together, to be your lover, and t'other, to disobey your father. sure. I have more honour than to go without You have too much love to take the one, and I you.
too much conscience to give t'other; so we are Slip. Well, on that condition, I am content to just where we were, madam. play your back hand. But bold, hold! how will Nan. Don't torment me, Jenny. you pass yourself for my master, in a family Jen. Why,'I fancy we might find a way to reo where you are so much known?
concile your love and my conscience. Mar. Hold your fool's tongue-this is my first Nan. How, how, my dear girl! visit to them. I returned hut yesterday to my Jen. Supose we were to open the affair to master. You must know, I asked his leave to your mamma? be absent a week, and I made free with a Nan. Nay, now your jesting is cruel. month: 'twas a party of pleasure, so I made Jen. I never was more in earnest, madam. bold. During my absence, he saw this lady, She loves flattery dearly; and she loves her liked her person, adored her fortune, and now, daughter dearly. "I'll warrant, with a sigh, and by my help, hopes to be in possession of both in a tear, and a handkerchief, she makes her husa few days.
band break his word with young Harlowe in a Slip. And you'll do the lady the honour to quarter of an hour after his arrival. help her to a better match?
Nan. Not unlikely; but ifMar. She'll think so, I believe,
Jen. What, at your ifs, no doubts, I beg, Slip. Well said, conceit!—But what sort of where I am concerned. people are your father and mother-in-law? Nan. But you know my poor mother is so un
Mar. I am told he is a mere citizen, who, settled a creature, thinking himself very wise, is often outwitted ; Jen. Why, that's true enough; the last and his lady has as much vanity in her way; will speaker is her oracle, so let us lose no time to never be old, though turned of sixty; and as ir- bring her over to---Ilark! Here she comes--do resolute and capricious as a girl of fitteen. And you retire, till I have prepared her for you. Miss, I suppose, is like all other misses, wants to be her own mistress, and her husband's; and, in
Enter Mrs. STOCKWELL. the mean timne, is governed by her chambermaid, wbo will be too hard for us both, if we don't Well, of all the women in London, sure there look about us.
never was such a temper as my lady's. Slip. But harkye! what shall we do with the Mrs. Stock. What can have set this girl old gentleinan's letter that I'm to deliver? This against me? will knock us all up!
Jen. Such good humour, and good sense to. Mar. Write another.
gether, seldom meet--then such a perpetual Slip. That's easier said than done--but I'll smile upon her features ! Well, her's is a sort do my best, as you can't write.
of a face that can never grow old; what would Mar. Do you see after my wedding-cloaths, I give for such a lasting face as she has ! that they do not set out for the country. We Mrs. Stock Hussy, hussy! you're a flatterer! have no time to lose.
[Taps her on the shoulder. Slip. My master's will fit you to a hair. Jen. Ah !-Madam, is it you? I vow you Mar. But stay, stay! I inust see my master
made me start.
Miss Nancy and I had just first. It he should appear and surprise us, we're been talking of you, and we agreed you were in a fine pickle. I must make him keep house one of the best of women, the most reasonable, for a few days--I'll think of a lie as I go-Egad friend, the tenderest mother, and the--theI have it already--I'll to him, and meet you at the terwards at the tavern! there take a glass, cast Mrs. Stock. Nay, that's too much. I have my this coarse skin, whip on the gentleinan, and failings, and my virtues too, Jenny-in one
I shame the first men of fashion in the kingdom. thing, indeed, I am very unlike other women;
[Erit. always hearken to reason.
Mrs. Stock. I am neither headstrong
like your SCENE II.--An Apartment in Mr. STOCK- mamma; will so good a mother, do you think, WELL's house.
force her daughter to marry against her incli
nation? Enter Miss Nancy and JENNY.
Mrs. Stock. I force my child's inclinations ! Nan. You know, Jenny, that Belford has yot No, I make the case my own. But tell me,
(there's a good girl) has my daughter an aversion Stock. Hey! that's chopping about, indeed! to young Harlowe?
Mrs. Stock. Nay, but, my dear, hear me, and Jen. I don't say that, madam,—that ismaver- let us reason a little; here's a better offer for sion to be sure—but I believe she hates him Nancy-Belford bas asked her of me. like the devil.
Stock. Belford a better! Mrs. Stock. Poor thing! poor thing! and Mrs. Stock, Nay, but don't be obstinate, perhaps her little heart is beating for another? child! he is not, indeed, so rich as the other;
Jen. Oh, that's a certain rule! when a young but what are riches to content, Mr. Stockwell? woman hates her husband, 'tis taken for granted Stock. And what is content without riches, she loves another man. For example, you your Mrs. Stockwell? self, as you have often told me, hated the sight Mrs. Stock. But he's a gentleman, my dear, of Mr. Stockwell, when first he was proposed and, out of regard to his family, we may very for your husband,Why? only because you well excuse his fortune. were in love, poor lady, with captain-you know Jen. Well said, madam! this will do. (Aside. who-that was killed at the siege--you know Stock. Ha, ha, ha! that's because you were a where.
gentlewoman-but I, being a downright cit, Mrs. Stock. Why will you name him, Jenny? think just the reverse; and, out of regard to his
[Wipes her eyes. fortune, if he had one, might excuse his faJen. Tender lady !
mily. I have no great objection to the man; Mrs. Stock. Why, indeed, had that fine young but is not our word and honour engaged to creature survived his wounds, I should never another? have married Mr. Stockwell, that I will say, Mrs. Stock. Eh! that's true, indeed! but
Jen. Then you know how to pity your daugh Stock. Has my old friend, Sir Harry Harlowe, ter. Her heart suffers now, what yours did done any thing to before that siege, madam.
Mrs. Stock. I don't accuse him, my dear. Mrs. Stock. Say you so ! poor girl! and who Stock. Or has his son refused to comply? is it has found the way to her heart?
Mrs. Stock. Not in the least, that I know of. Jen. No other than the young gentleman that has been so constant at cards with you lately. Mrs. Stock. Never Tear, Tenny.} [Aside. Mrs. Stock. Who, Belford ?
Nan, But I have never seen him, papa. Jen. The same, and a fine spirited young fel Mrs. Stock. No, Mr. Stockwell, she has never low it is.
Stock. So much the better, Mrs. Stockwell ; Enter Miss Nancy.
he'll be a greater novelty, and please her the Nan. Pardon iny folly, my misfortune, dear better and the longer for it. madam, if I cannot conform in all my senti Mrs. Stock. There is some reason in that, ments with your's, and my father's
Jenny. Mrs. Stock. It will happen, child, sometimes, Jen. Is there, madam, then I have not a bit that a daugliter's heart may not be disposed to about me. comply exactly with the views and schemes of Nan. But to marry without inclination, sir ! a parent; but then, a parent should act with think of that. tenderness. My dear, I pity your distress : Mrs. Stock. Ay, think of that, Mr. Stockwell. Belford has my approbation, 1 assure you, Stock. I pever thought of it for myself, nor Nan. You are too good, madam!
you neither, my dear; and why sliould our Jen. Your approbation is not enough, ma- daughter think herself
wiser than her parents ? daro; will you answer for master's too? He's Mrs. Stock, Ay, why, indeed !-there's no a stabborn bit of stuff, you know; he will not answering that, Jenny. always hearken to reason,
Jen. I see there is not-What a woman ! Mrs. Stock. But he shall, Jenny : siubborn
[Aside. as be is, I'll soften him. I'll take Belford un Stock. It would be such an affront, as never der my protection-- Here comes my husband could be forgiven. Consider, dame, the instruI have taken my resolution, and you shall see ments are signed, preparations made, and the how I'll bring bim about presently.
bridegroom expected every minute ; 'tis too far
gone to be recalled with any honour. Enter MR. STOCKWELL.
Mrs. Stock. Good lack-a-day! very true, very
true ! My dear, you're come in the very nick of time; Jen. Well said, weathercock ! about and I have just changed my mind.
about we go-this woman betrays the whole Stock. You are always changing it, I think. sex-she won't contradict her own busband. Mrs. Stock. I always hearken to reason, Mr.
Mrs. Stock. You are witness, Jenny, I did all Stock. Well, and which way does the wind set I could for poor Belford ? now!
Jen. To be sure ; you took him under your Mrs. Stock. Why, I have taken a resolution protection--a noble patroness, truly ! pot to marry my daughter to young
Harlowe. Stock. Hey! whom have we got here? I'll be
hanged if this is not my son-in-law's servant. Stock. (Reads.]' My much honoured friend Now, girl, we shall hear.
-few words are best in my condition ; this Enter Slip, in a hurry.
• damned gout has laid hold upon me, and won't
I let me attend my son, for to be present at his Slip. Ladies and gentlemen, I am come-let matrimony'—For to be present at bis matrime recover ny breath-I coine-Ob! I come mony - I think his hand and style too much with nine, and my master's compliments to altered. your honour, and my lady, our best love and Slip. The gout, sir. services to pretty iniss, and-madain, I'm your
Stock. [Reading] · I look upon this conobedient Black-a-moor.
[To JEANY. juncture of our families.'Conjuncture!-a very Stock. Um! the fellow has humour, I promise odd phrase ! you.--Well, sirrah, where's your master? Slip. My master and your son, is on his way another man in it.
Slip. The gout, dear sir, the gout! He's quite to throw himself at the feet of this angelic creature. His impatience, Madam, can equal no
Stock. - I look upon this conjuncture of our thing but your beauty.
families, as the comfort of my age-The sooner Stock. Well, but where is he, where is he? it is done the more comfort I shall hade~I Slip. He's but just arrived from the country;
* don't doubt but you'll like my son, whom I have he treads upon my heels, and I had only. che
sent with a most trusty and faithful servant, start of him to tell you, that lie will but whip
• who deserves your friendship and favour.' on clean linen, and wait on you in the snapping Slip. O law, sir !-I am quite ashamed. of a finger. Stock. Oh, fie upon him! what need all this death.
Stock. “ I am, my dear brother, yours, &c. till
'HENRY Harlowe.' ceremony between us ! why did not he come hither directly? He knows he may make my I am very sorry, sir, we can't have the old genhouse his own.
tleman's company.-But who is this gay young Slip. Oh, sir, he designs it, but the first time fellow coming towards us ?—Can this be my -pardon me, sir-He knows the world better son-in-law? than to treat you so cavalierly as that--No, no; Slip. What the devil should ail him? Look at he's not that man, I can assure you ; though I'm him, Miss; observe him, madam-Is not he a his valet, yet I'll give the devil his due.
pretty fellow? Mrs. Stock. Is he so extremely well bred ? Stöck. What is hie doing ! Daughter, you will be infinitely happy.
Slip. Only paying his chairman-Generous as Stock. Does not my old friend, Harlowe, his a prince.
[To Jenny. father, come with him?
Stock. Not ill made, indeed !-You'll only be Slip. Sir, I grieve to tell it you ; such was his too happy, child. design, but an unforeseen accident has prevent Nancy. I wish I could think so, madam. ed him; which, I assure you, gives him great Slip. Dress us but as well, and wc'll cut out pain.
our masters, ten to onc. All my fancy, I assure Stock. Ay! what's the matter?
(Aside. Slip. The gout, sir, the gout ! Mrs. Stock. Poor gentleman!
Enter Martin, as young
HARLOWE, Slip. He was seized in his right foot, the even Mar. Slip! ing before we set out, but I have a letter from Slip. Your honour! him.
(Gives a letter. Mar. Mr. Stockwell, I presume, iny illusStock. (Puts on his spectacles and reads.] trious father
Slip. The same, sir, in proprium personum. • To doctor, doctor Clackit, physician, near St.
Stock. My dear son, welcome! let me emSepulchre's church
Slip. Lud, Jud! that's not it—[Takes out let Mar. You do me too much honour; my suters.] Let me see!
perabundant joy is too inexpressible to express Stock. St. Sepulchre's church !-I find the the-This I Hatter myself" [To Mrs. STOCKdoctor chuses to live among his patients. WELL.] is the brilliant beauty, destined to the
Slip, Eh, eh! that's so good! you're a very arins of happy Mart—Harlowe~Gad! I'd like wag, sir !-He, he, be !-let me see-Oh, here's to have forgot my own name.
[Aside. one like it.—To Mr. Stockwell; the saine. I Nuncy. An impertinent absurd coxcomb! am afraid you'll hardly be able to make it out
[Aside. -shall I read it to you? Oh, this unlucky Stock. Nay, nay, son-in-law, not so fast; gout!
that's my wife. Here's my daughter Nancy, Stock. I see it has affected his hands, too Mar. A fine creature! [Salutes her.] MaWhy 'tis scarce legible; and ill spelt, too. dam, I have seen the world! and from all the
Slip. The gout, sir,--way it never affect you, world, here would I chuse a wife, and a mistress sir, nor madam Stockwell, Miss Nancy, that -a family of beauties; let me die! young woman there, por any of the good com Stock. Excessively gallant! He has wit, I pany.
assure you, daughter.