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Sir Gre. Do so, do so : Tim is without; Har. Well, sir, it is difficult for me to refuse just come from his uncle Treyegle's, at Mene- you any thing. gizy, in Cornwall. Tim is an honest lad - do Sir Gre. Ten thousand thanks. Good now! so, do so –Erit Jenk.]-Well, Mr. Hartop, the pope-Wonderful! I'll minute il down and so we have a peace, lack-a-day! long- Both the Needles ? looked-for come at last. But, pray, Mr. Hartop, Har. Ay, both. how many news-papers may you have printed in Sir Gre. Good now; I'll minute it—the Lia-week?
zard-point-both the Needles Scilly-rocksHar. About an hundred and fifty, Sir Gre- bishop of Greenland-St. Peter's chair-Why gory.
then, when this is finished, we may chance to atSir Gre. Good now, good now! and all full, tack the great Turk, and have boly wars again, I reckon ; full as an egg; nothing but news! Mr. Hartop. Well, well, I shall go to London one of these Har. That's part of the scheme. days. A hundred and fifty? Wonderful! And Sir Gre. Ah, good now! You see I have a pray, now, which do you reckon the best? head! Politics have been my study many a day.
Har. Oh, Sir Gregory, they are various in Ah, if I had been in London to improve by the their excellencies, as their uses. If you are news-papers,! They tell me Dr. Drybones is to inclined to blacken, by a couple of lines, the re succeed to the bishoprick of Wisper? putation of a neighbour, you may do it for two Har. No; Doctorshillings in one paper: if you are displaced, or Sir Gre. Indeed! I was told by my landlord disappointed of a place, a triplet against the mi- at Ross, that it was between him and the dean nistry will be always well received at the head of of another; and then, as a paper of morning Hur. To my knowledge. amusement, you have the Fool.
Sir Gre. Nay, you know best, to be sure. If Sir Gre. The Fool? good lack! and pray who it should Hush! here's Mr. Jenkins and son and what may that same fool be?
Tim-mum !-Mr. Jenkins does not know any Har. Why, Sir Gregory, the author has art-thing about the treaty with the pope? fully assumed that liabit, like the royal jesters of Har. Not a word. old, to level his satire with more security to him Sir Gre. Mum! self, and severity to others. Sir Gre. May be so, may be so ! The Fool!
Enter Tim and MR. JENKINS. ha, ha, ha! Well enough; a queer dog, and no fool, I warrant you. Killigrew ; ah, I have heard
Jen. Mr. Timothy is almost grown out of my grandfather' talk much of that same Killi- | knowledge, Sir Greyory. grex, and no fool. But what's all this to news,
Sir Gre. Goud now, good now! ay, ay; INI Mr. Hartop? Who gives us the best account of weeds grow a-pace. Son Tim, Mr. Hartop; a the king of Spain, and the queen of Hungary, and great man, child! Mr. Hartop, son Tim. those great folks? Come now, you could give us
Har. Sir, I shall be always glad to know every a little news, if you would; come now-snug! branch that springs from so valuable a trunk as -nobody by. Good now, do; come, ever so Sir Gregory Gazette. little.
Sir Gre. May be so. Wonderful! ay, ay: Har. Why, as you so largely contribute to the Har. Sir, I am glad to see you in Herefordsupport of the government, it is but fair
you been long from Cornwa!l? should know what they are about. We are at Tim. Ay, sir, a matter of four weeks or a present in a treaty with the pope.
month, more or less. Sir Gre. With the pope! Wonderful! Good Sir Gre. Well said, Tim ! Ay, ay, ask Tim now, good now! How, how!
any questions, he can answer for himself. Tim Har. We are to yield him up a large track tell Mr. llartep all the news about the elections, of the Terra-incognita, together with both the and the tinners, and the tides, and the roads, and Needles, Scilly-rocks, and the Lizard-point, on the pilchards. I want a few words with Mr. Jencondition that the pretender has the government kins. of Laputa, and the bishop of Greenland suc Har. You have been so long absent from your ceeds to St. Peter's air; he being, you know, a native country, that you have almost forgot it. protestant, when possessed of the pontificals, is Tim. Yes sure. I ha' been at uncle Tregesues out a bull, commanding all catholics to be gle's a matter of twelve or a dozen year, more of his religion; they, deeming the pope infalli- or less. ble, follow his directions; and then, Sir Gre Har. Then I reckon you were quite impatient gory, we are all of one mind.
to see your papa and mamma? Sir Gre. Good lack, good lack ! Rare news,
Tim. No sure, not I. Father sent for me to rare news, rare news! Ten millions of thanks, uncle.—Sure Menegiry is a choice place! and I Mr. Hartop. But might not I just hint this could a staid there all my born days, more or to Mr. Soakum, our vicar? 'twould rejoice his less. heart.
Har. Pray, sir, what were your amusements? Har. O fie, by no means !
Tim. Nan! what d'ye say ?
Tim. Oh, we ha' pastimes enow there ;--we Jen. Mr. Hartop, Sir Gregory will be amongst ha' bull-baiting, and cock-fighting, and fishing, us some time-he is going with his son to Sir Pe and hunting, and hurling, and wrestling. nurious Trifle's there is a kind of a treaty of
Har. The two last are sports, for which that marriage on foot between Miss Sukey Trifle and country is very remarkable ;-in those, I pre- Mr. Timothy. sume, you are very expert ?
Har. The devil! [Apart.] I shall be glad of Tim. Nan! What?
every circumstance that can make me better acHar. I say you are a good wrestler.
quainted with Sir Gregory. Tim. Oh, yes sure, I can wrestle well enow : Sir Gre. Good now, good now! may --but we don't wrestle after your fashion; we may be so ! ha' no tripping, fath and sole! we go all upon Tim. Father, sure the gentleman says as how close hugs, or the flying mare. Will you try a mother and he are a-kin! fall, inaster?-I won't hurt you, fath and sole. Sir Gre. Wonderful! Lack-a-day, lack-a
Har. We had as good not venture though. day! how, how? I am proud to—but how, Mr. But have you left in Cornwall nothing that you Hartop, how? regret the loss of more than hurling and wrest Har. Why, sir, a cousin-german of my aunt's ling?
first husband intermarried with a distant relaTim. Nan! What?
tion of a collateral branch by the mother's side, Har. No favourite she!
the Apprices of Lantrindon; and we have ever Tim. Arra, I coupled Favourite and Jowler since quartered in a 'scutcheon of pretence the together, and sure they tugged it all the way three goat's tails rampant, divided by a cheveup. Part with Favourite! no, I thank you for ron, field-argent; with a leek pendant in the nothing. You must know l nursed Favourite dexter point, to distinguish the second house. myself : uncle's huntsman was going to Mill Sir Gre. Wonderful! wonderful ! nearly, pond to drown all Music's puppies; so I saved nearly related ! Good now, good now; if dame she. But fath, I'll tell you a comical story; at Winnifred was here, she'd make them all out Lanston, they both broke loose, and eat a with a wet finger-but they are above me. whole loin-a'-veal, and a leg of beef: Crist! Pr’ythee, Tim, good now, see after the horses How landlord sweared! fath the poor fellow-and, d'ye hear? try if you can get any newswas almost amazed ; it made me die wi' laugh- papers. ing. But how came you to know about our Tim. Yes, father-But, cousin wiat-d'ye-callFavourite?
um, not a word about Maily Pengrouse! Har. A circumstance so material to his son, Hur. Mum !
[E.rit Tim. could not escape the knowledge of Sir Gregory Sir Gre. Good now, that boy will make some Gazette's friends. But here you mistook me a mistake about the horses now! I'll go myself. little, 'Squire Tim ; I meant whether your affec-Good now, no farther cousin ; if you please, no tions were not settled upon some pretty girl.-- ceremony-A hundred and fifty news-papers a Has not some Cornish lass caught your heart? week! the Fool! ha, ha, ha! wonderful! an Tim. Hush! cod, the old man will hear; jog odd dog!
[Erit SIR GREGORY. a tiny bit this way.--won't a' tell father?
Jen. So Jack, here's a fresh spoke in your Har. Upon my honour !
wheel, Tin. Why then, I'll tell you the whole story Har. This is a cursed cross incident ! inore or less. Do you know Mally Pengrouse? Jen. Well, but something must be done to Har. I am not so lippy.
frustrate the scheme of your new cousin's. Can Tim. She's uncle's milk-maid ;-she's as hand- you think of nothing? some, Lord! her face all red and white, like the Har. I have been bammering: pray, are the inside of a shoulder of mutton; so I made love two knights intimate? are they well acquainted to our Mally: and just, fath, as I had got her with each other's person? good-will to run away to Exeter and be married, Jen. Faith, I can't tell; but we may soon know. uncle found it out, and sent word to father, and Har. Could you recommend me a good spifather sent for me home-but I don't love her a rited girl, who has humour and compliance to bit the worse for that. But i'cod, if you tell fa- follow a few directions, and understanding ther, he'll knock my brains out; for he says, I'll enough to barter a little inclination for 30001. adisparage the family, and mother's as mad as a year and a fool ? March hare about it--so father and mother ha' Jen. In part I guess your design; the man's brought me to be married to some young body in daughter of the house is a good lively lass, has a
fortune to make, and no reputation to lose : I'll Har. What, is my lady here?
call her-Jenny! but the enemy's at hand Tim. No, sure; dame Winnifred, as father I'll withdraw, and prepare Jenny. When the calls her, could not come along.
worshipful family are retired, I'll
introduce the Har. I ain sorry for that ; I have the honour wench.
[Erit Jenkins. to be a distant relation of your ladyship's. Tim. Like enough, fath-she's a-kin to half
Enter Sir Gregory and Tim. the world, I think. But don't you say a word to Sir Gre. Pray, now, cousin, are you in friendfather about Wally Penyrulise lush!
ship with willa Sir Penurious Trinc?
Har. I have the honour, sir, of that gentle-| folly of Sir Penurious the father, I don't despair man's acquaintance.
of a happy catastrophe.
Enter Jenny. they tell me we shall hardly hare necessaries for ourselves and horses at Gripe-ball; Jenny. Sir, Mr, Jenkins but as you are a relation, you should, good now, Har. Ob, child, your instructions shall be anknow the affairs of the family. Here's Sir Pe ministered within. nurious's letter ; here, cousin.
Jenny. Mr. Jenkins, has opened your design, Har. · Your overture I receive with pleasure, and I am ready and able to execute my part. and should be glad to meet you in Shropshire' Har. My dear, I have not the least doubt of I fancy, from a thorough knowledge of Sir Pe either your inclination or ability—But pox take nurious's disposition, and from what I can col- this old fellow! what in the devil's naine can lect from the contents of that letter, he would bring him back? Scour, Jenny. be much better pleased to meet you here than at his own house.
Enter Sir GREGORY. Sir Gre. Lack-a-day, may be so !-a strange man! wonderful ! But, good now, cousin, what Sir Gre. Cousin, I beg pardon; but I have a must we do?
favour to beg-Good now, could not you make Har. I am this morning going to pay Sir Pen- interest at some coffee-house in London, to buy, urious a visit, and if you'll honour me with your for a small matter, the old books of newspacommands, I'll
pers, and send them into the country to me? Sir Gre. Wonderful! to-day Sgood now, They would pass away the time rarely in a rainy that's lucky! cousin, you are very kind. Good daynow, I'll send a letter, Tim, by cousin Hartop. Har. I'll send you a cart-load.
Har. A letter from so old an acquaintance, Sir Gre. Good now, good now! Ten thouand upon so happy an occasion, will secure me a sand thanks !—You are a cousin, indeed. But, favourable reception.
pray, cousini, let us, good now, see some of the Sir Gre. Good lack, good lack, an old ac works of that same fool? quaintance, indeed, cousin Hartop! we were at Har. I'll send you them all; but a Hereford 'size together-let's see, wonderful, Sir Gre. What, all ?-Lack-a-day, that's kind, how long ago!-'twas while I was courting cousin ! The Terra-incognita—both the Needles Dame Winny, the year before I married--Good -a great deal of that! But what bishop is to be now, how long? let's see—that year the hackney pope? stable was built, and Peter Ugly, the blind pad, Har. Zounds, sir! I ain in haste for your letfell into a saw-pit.
ter-When I return, ask as many questionsTim. Mother says, father and she was married Sir Gre. Good now, good now! that's true the first of April in the year ten; and I knows I'll in and about it
-But, cousin, the pope 'tis thereabout, for I am two-and-thirty; and is not to have Gibraltar? brother Jereiny, and Roger, and Gregory, and Här. No, no; damn it, no! As none but the sister Nelly, were born before I.
Fool could say it, so none but idiots would beSir Gre. Good now, good now! how time lieve him—Pray,
Sir Gregory wears away! wonderful! thirty-eight years ago, Sir Gre. Well, well, cousin; Lack-a-day! you Tim! I could not have thought it. But come are so—but prayin, let's set about the letter. But, pray, cousin, Har. Damn your praying? If you don't finish what diversions, good now, are going forward in your letter immediately, you may carry it yourLondon?
self, Har. Oh, sir, we are in no distress for amuse Sir Gre. Well, well, cousin! Lack-a-day! you ment; we have plays, balls, puppet-shews, mas are in such a-youd now, I go, I go! querades, bull-baitings, boxings, burlettas, routs, Hur. But if the truth should be discovered, I drums, and a thousand others. But I am in haste shall be inevitably disappointed. for your epistle, Sir Gregory.
Sir. Gre. But, cousin, are Scilly rocksSir Gre. Cousin, your servant.
Har. I wish they were in your guts with all [Ereunt Sir Gregory and Timothy. my heart! I must quit the field, I find. Har. I amr your most obedient-Thus far our
[Exit Hartop. scheme succeeds: and if Jenkins's girl can as Sir Gre. Wonderful! good now, good now! sume the aukward pertness of the daughter, with a passionate man! Lack-a-day: I am glad the as much success as I can imitate the spirited pope is not to have Gibraltar though. [Erit.
SCENE I.—Sir Gregory, and Tin reading Sir Gre. Lack-a-day, ay, ay. Pray, is cousin news to him, discovered.
Hartop come along?
Jenk. I have not seen him; but I fancy I had Tim. CONSTANTINOPLE, N. S. Nov. 15, the better introduce my neighbours. Grand Seignior
Sir Gre. Good now, would you be so kind? Sir Gre. Lack-a-day! good now, Tim, the [Exit Jenkins.) Stand behind me, Tim-Pull politics, child : and read the stars, and the down your ruffles, child. dashes, and the blanks, as I taught you, Tim. Tim. But, father, won't Miss Suck tbink me
Tim. Yes, father We can assure our readers, bold, if I kiss her chops the first time? that the D-daslı is to go to F blank : and that Sir Gre. Lack-a-day! no, Tim, no. Faint a certain noble L-is to resign bis pme in the heart never won fair lady. Ha, Tim, had you My in order to make room for the two three but seen me attack dame Winny! But times stars.
aren't as they were. Good now, we were anoSir Gre. Wonderful! good now, good now! ther kind of folks in those days; stout hearty great news, Tim! Ah, I knew the two three smacks, that would ha' made your mouth water stars would come in play one time or other. again; and the mark stood upon the pouting This London Evening knows more than any of lip, like the print upon a pound of butter. But them. Well, child, well.
the master-misses of the present age go, lack-aTim. From the D. J.
day, as gingerly about it, as if they were afraid Sir Gre. Ay, that's the Dublin Journal. Go to fill their mouths with the paint upon their
mistresses' cheeks. Ah, the days I have seen! Tim. Last Saturday, a gang of highwaymen Tim. Nay, father, I warrant, if that's all, I broke into an empty house on Ormond quay, and kiss her hearty enow, fath and sole! stripped it of all the furniture.
Sir Gre. Hush, Tim, hush! Stand behind me, Sir Gre. Lack-a-day, wonderful! To what a child. height these rogues are grown! Tim. The way to Mr. Keith's chapel, is turn Enter Hartop as Sir Penurious Trifle, and
JENNY as Miss Sukey, and JENKINS. Sir Gre. Psha ! skip that, Tim; I know that road as well as the doctor : 'tis in every Sir Gre. Sir Penurious, I am overjoyed! time.
Goud now ! Tim. J. Ward, at the Cat and Gridiron, Pet Har. Sir Gregory, I kiss your hand. My ticoat lane, makes tabby all over for people in-daughter Suck. clined to be crooked; and if he was to have the Sir Gre. Wonderful !-Miss, I am proud to universal world for making a pair of stays, he -Son Tim—Sir Penurious—Best bow, childcould noi put better stuff in them
Miss SuckSir Gre. Good now ; where's that, Tim?
Tim. An't that right, father? Tim. At the Cat and Gridiron, father.
Sir Gre. Good now, good now! I am glad to Sir Gre. I'll minute that? All my Lady see you look so well." You keep your own, Sir Isard's children, good now, are inclined to be Penurious. crooked.
Har. Ay, ay, stout enough, Sir Gregory; stout Enter Drawer.
enough, brother knight; hearty as an oak. Hey,
.Dick? Gad, now I talk of an oak, I'll tell you Draw. Sir, Mr. Jenkin's begs to speak with a story of an oak. It will make you die with you.
laughing.. Hey, you Dick, you have heard it; Sir Gre. Good now; desire him to walk in. shall I tell it Sir Gregory?
Jen. Though I have heard it so often, yet Enter JENKINS.
there is something so engaging in your manner
of telling a story, that it always appears new. Jenk. I thought it inight not be improper to Sir Gre. Wonderful ! good now, good now; prepare you for a visit from Sir Penurious I love a comical story. Pray, Sir Penurious, Trifle. I saw him and his daughter alight at the let's have it.- Mind, Tim; mind, child. apothecary's above.
Tim. Yes, father; fath and sole, I love a Sir Gré. What, they are come? Wonderful! choice story to my heart's blood ! Very kind, very kind, very kind, indeed, Mr.- Har. You knight, I was at Bath last summer Come, Tim, settle my cravat; good now, let's -a water that people drink when they are be a little decent.—Remember your best bow ill. You have heard of the bath, Dick? Hey, to your mistress, Tim.
Tim. Yes, father! but must not I kiss Miss Tim. Yes, fath, I know Bath ; I was there in Suck?
my way up:
Sir Gre. Hush, Tim; good now, hush! Sir Gre. Good now, yood now! Wonder
Har. There's a coffee-house, you a place ful! where people drink coffee and rea, and read the Tim. A choice tale, fath!
Jen. Oh, Sir Penurious is a most entertaining Sir Gre. Pray, Sir Penurious, how many pa- companion, that must be allowed. pers may they take in?
Sir Gre. Good now, ay, ay, a inerry man! Hur. Psha! damn the news ! mind the story. But lack-a-day, would not the young lady
Sir Gre. Good now, good now! a hasty man, choose a little refreshment after her ride? Tim !
Some tea, or some Har. Pox take you both! I have lost the Har. Hey, you knight! No; no; we intend story-Where did I leave off? Hey-you Dick. to dine with thee, man. Well, you, Tim, what Tim. About coffee, and tea.
dost think of thy father-in-law that is to be, Har. Right, right! True, true; So, ecod, bey? A jolly cock, you, Tim; hey, Dick? you knight, I used to breakfast at this coffee- But, pr’ythee, boy, what dost do with all this house every morning; it cost me eight-pence, tawdry tinsel on that hat and waistcoat? though, and I had always a breakfast at home trash, knight, trash ! more in thy pocket, and no matter for that, though! there I breakfasted, less in thy clothcs; hey, you Dick? ecod, you you, Dick, ecod, at the same table with Lord knight, I'll nake you laugh, I went to London, Tom Truewit-You have heard of Truewit, you, Dick, last year, to call in a mortgage; and you knight, a droll dog! You, Dick, he told what does me, 1, Dick, but take a trip to a us the story, and made us die with laughing. coffce-house in St. Martin's-lane; in comes a You have heard of Charles II. you knight ; he French fellow forty times as fine as Tim, with was son of Charles I. king here in England, his muff and parlevous, and his Frances! and that was beheaded by Oliver Cromwell: So, his head, you knight, as white with powder, what does Charles I. you knight do? But he ecod, you, as a twelfth cake: and who the fights Noll at Worcester, a town you have devil d'ye think, Dick, this might be, hey, you heard of, not far off: but all would not do, knight? you : ecod, Noll made him scamper, made him Sir Gre. Good now, an ambassador, to be run, take to his heels, you knight. Truewit sure. told us the story, made us die with laughing. I Har. Ecod, you knight, nor better nor worse always breakfasted at the coffee-house; it cost than Mynbeer Vancaper, a dutch figure-dancer me eight-pence, though I had a breakfast at ot the opera house in the Haymarket. home - So what does Charles do, but hid him Sir Gre. Wonderful ! good now, good now ! self in an oak, an oak-tree, you, in a wood, call Har. Psha! Pox, pr’ythee, Tim, nobody dresed Boscobel, from two Italian words, Bosco ses now; all plain : look at me, knight; I am in Bello, a fine wood, you; and off he marches: the tip of the mode : now am I in full dress; but old Noll would not let him come home; no, hey, Dick? says be, you don't come here. Lord Tom told Jen. You, sir, don't want the aid of dress; us the story; made us die with laughing; it but in Mr. Gazette, a little regard to that
parcost me eight-pence, though I had a breakfast ticular is but a necessary compliment to his at home. So, you knight, when Noll died, mistress. Monk there, you, afterwards Albermarle, in Har. Stuff, Dick, stuff! my daughter, knight, the north, brought him back. So, you, the ca- has had otherguess breeding. Hey, you, Suck, valiers, you have heard of them? they were come forward. Plain as a pike-staff, knight; friends to the Stuarts. What did they do, ecod, all as nature made her; hey, Tim? no flams. you Dick! But they put up Charles in a sign, Pr’ythee, Tim, off with thy lace and burn it; the Royal Oak; you have seen such signs at 'twill help to buy the licence: she'll not like country ale-houses : so, ecod, you, what does a thee a bit the better for that; hey, Suck? but puritan do?-the puritans were friends to Noll you, knight! ecod, Dick, a toast and cankard --but he puts up the sign of an owl in the ivy- would not be amiss after our walk; hey, you? bush, and underneath he writes, · This is not Sir Gre. Good now, good now! What you the royal oak.?. You have seen writings under will, Sir Penurious. signs, you knight? Upon this, says the royalists, Har. Ecod, that's hearty, you! but we won't ecod, this must not be; so, you, what do they part the young couple, hey? I'll send Suck do, but, ecod, they prosecuted the poor puri- some bread and cheese in; hey, knight? at her, tan; but they made him change his sign, Tim. Come, Dick; come, you knight. Did I though. And you, Dick, how do you think they ever tell you my courtship, hey, Dick ? 'twill changed it? Écod, he puts up the royal oak, make you laugh. and underneath he writes, “ This is not the owl Jen. Not as I remember. in the ivy bush. It made us all die with laugh Sir Gre. Lack-a-day, let's have it. ing. Lord Tom told the story. I always break Har. You know my wife was blind, you, fasted at the coffee-house, though it cost ine eight- knigbt! pence, and I had a breafast at home; hey, you Sir Gre. Good now, wonderful ! not I. knight? What, Dick, hey?
Har. Blind as a beetle when I married her, knight; hey Dick ? she was drowned in our