I had it in my thoughts, before I received the letter of this lady, to confider this dreadful paf fion in the mind of a woman; and the fmart the feems to feel does not abate the inclination I had to recommend to husbands a more regular behaviour, than to give the moft exquifite of torments to those who love them, nay whofe torment would be abated if they did not love them. It is wonderful to obferve how little is made of this inexpreffible injury, and how eafily men get into an habit of being leaft agreeable where they are moft obliged to be fo. But this fubject deferves a diftinct fpeculation, and I fhall obferve for a day or two the behaviour of two or three happy pairs I am acquainted with, before I pretend to make a fyftem of conjugal morality. I defign in the first place to go a few miles out of town, and there I know where to meet one who practifes all the parts of a fine gentleman in the duty of an husband. When he was a bachelor much business made him particularly negligent in his habit; but now there is no young lover living fo exact in the care of his perfon. One who asked why he was so long washing his mouth, and fo delicate in the choice and wearing of his linen, was anfwered, because there is a woman of Merit obliged to receive me kindly, and I think it incumbent upon me to make her inclination go along with her duty. If a man would give himfelf leave to think, he would not be fo unreasonable as to expect debauchery and innocence could live in commerce together; or hope that flesh and blood is capable of fo ftrict an allegiance, as that a fine woman muft go on to improve herself until the is as good and impaffive as an angel, only to preserve a fidelity to a brute and a fatyr. The lady who defires me for her fake to end one of my papers with the following letter, I am perfuaded, thinks fuch a perfeverance very impracticable. cat tertainments of both kinds, and by that means perhaps confult the good of both, more than I fhould do, did I always write to the particular tafte of either. As they neither of them know what I proceed upon, the fprightly reader, who takes up my paper in order to be diverted, very often finds himfelf engaged unawares in a ferious and profitable courfe of thinking; as on the contrary, the thoughtful man, who perhaps may hope to find fomething folid, and full of deep reflection, is very often infenfibly betrayed into a fit of mirth. In a word, the reader fits down to my entertainment without knowing his bill of fate, and has therefore at leaft the pleasure of hoping there may be a difh to his palate. I must confefs, were I left to myself, I should rather aim at inftru&ting than diverting; but if we will be useful to the world, we must take it as we find it. Authors of profeffed severity difcourage the loofer part of mankind from having any thing to do with their writings. A man muft have virtue in him, before he will enter upon the reading of a Seneca or an Epictetus. The very title of a moral treatise has fomething in it auftere and fhocking to the careless and inconfiderate. For this reafon several unthinking persons fall in my way, who would give no attention to lcctures delivered with a religious seriousness or a philofophic gravity. They are infnared into fentiments of wisdom and virtue when they do not think of it; and if by tliat means they arrive only at fuch a degree of confideration as may difpofe them to liften to more ftudied and claborate difcourfes, I fhall not think my fpeculations useless. I might likewife obferve, that the gloominets in which fometimes the minds of the beft men are involved, very often ftands in need of fuch little incitements to mirth and laughter, as are apt to disperse melancholy, and put our faculties in good humour. To which fome will other, makes entertainments of this nature in a add, that the British climate, more than any manner neceffary. If what I have here faid does not recommend, it will at leaft excufe the variety of my fpeculations. I would not willingly laugh but in order to inftruct, or if I fometimes fail in this point, when my mirth ceafes to be inftructive, it shall never cease to be innocent. A fcrupulous conduct in this particular, has, perhaps, more inerit in it than the generality of readers imagine; did they know how many thoughts occur in a point of humour, which a difcreet author in modesty fuppreffes; how many ftrokes of raillery prefent themselves, which could not fail to please the cr dinary taste of mankind, but are ftifled in their birth by reafon of fome remote tendency which they carry in them to corrupt the minds of those who read them; did they know how many glan. ces of ill-nature are induftrioufly avoided for they would be apt to think kindly of thofe writers who endeavour to make themfelves diverting, without being immoral. One may apply to these authors that passage in Waller, "Poets lofe half the praife they would have gor, "Were it but known what they difcreetly blot.' under injury to vifions, the mercurial and the saturnine. The firft are the gay part of my disciples, who require fpeculations of wit and humour; the others are thofe of a more folemn and sober turn, who pleasure but in papers of morality and found fenfe. The former call every thing that is ferious ftupid; the latter look upon every thing as impertinent that is ludicrous. Were I always grave, one half of my readers would fall off from me : were I always merry, I should lose the other. I make it therefore my endeavour to find out en As nothing is more easy than to be a wit with all the above-mentioned liberties, it requires fome genius and invention to appear fuch without them, What I have here faid is not only in regard to the public, but with an eye to my particular correfpondent, who has fent me the following Ictter, which I have caftrated in fome places upon thefe confiderations. . ' SIR, Aving lately feen your difcourfe upon a Having lately feing, I cannot forbear giv at the house of a very worthy gentleman, who always entertains his tenants at that time of the year. They yawn for a Chefhire-cheese, and begin about midnight, when the whole company is difpofed to be drowsy. He that yawns wideft, and at the fame time fo naturally as to produce the moft yawns among the spectators, carries home the cheese. If you handle this fubject as you ought, I queftion not but your paper will fet half the kingdom a yawning, though I dare promise you it will never make any body fall afleep.' L ing you an account of a whistling match, which, N° 180. WEDNESDAY, SEPT. 26. The next that mounted the ftage was an under-citizen of the Bath, a perfon remarkable among the inferior people of that place for his 6 great wifdom and his broad band. He contraced his mouth with much gravity, and, that he might difpofe his mind to be more ferious than ordinary, began the tune of "The "children in the wood," and went through part of it with good fuccefs; when on a fudden the wit at his elbow, who had appeared wonderfully grave and attentive for fome time, gave him a touch upon the left fhoulder, and ftared him in the face with fo bewitching a grin, that < the whiftler relaxed his fibres into a kind of fimper, and at length burst out into an open laugh. The third who entered the lifts was a footman, who in defiance of the MerryAndrew, and all his arts, whifled a Scotch tune and an Italian fonata, with fo fettled a countenance, that he bore away the prize, to the great admiration of fome hundreds of perfons, who, as well as myfelf, were prefent at this trial of kill. Now, Sir, I humbly conceive, whatever you have determined of the grinners, the whiftlers ought to be encouraged, not only as their art is pracffed without diftortion, but as it improves country mufic, promotes gravity, and teaches cidinary people to keep their countenances, if they fee any thing ridiculous in their bettors; befides that, it feems an entertainment very particularly adapted to the Bath, as it is ufual for a rider ( to whifde to his horfe when he would make his waters país.' CREECH. HE following letter has fo much weight T and good fenfe, that I cannot forbear inferting it, though it relates to an hardened finner, whom I have very little hopes of reforming, viz. Lewis XIV. of France. After having difpatched these two important points of grinning and whittling, I hope you will oblige the world with fome reflections upon yawning, as I have feen it practifed on a twelfth Fight among other Chriftimas gambols Midft the variety of fubjects of which you have treated, could wish it had fal len in your way, to expofe the vanity of conquefts. This thought would naturally lead one to the French King, who has been generally esteemed the greateft conqueror of our C age, until her Majefty's armies had torn from him fo many of his countries, and deprived him of the fruit of all his former victories. For my own part, if I were to draw his picture, I 'fhould be for taking him no lower than to the peace of Ryfwick, juft at the end of his triumphs, and before his reverfe of fortune: and even then I fhould not forbear thinking his ambition had been vain and unprofitable to himself and his people. As for himfelf, it is certain he can have gained nothing by his conquefts, if they have not rendered him mafter of more fubje&s, more riches, or greater power. What I fhall be able to offer upon thefe heads, I refolve to fubmit to your confideration. To begin then with his increafe of fubje&s. From the time he came of age, and has been a manager for himfelf, all the people he had acquired were fuch only as he had reduced by his wars, and were left in his poffeffion by the peace; he had conquered not above one third part of Flanders, and confequently no more than one third part of the inhabitants of that province. About 100 years ago the houfes in that country were all numbered, and by a juft computation the inhabitants of all forts could not then exceed 750,000 fouis. And if any man will confider the defolation by almost perpe⚫tual wars, the numerous armies that have lived almoft ever fince at difcretion upon the people, and how much of their commerce has been removed for inore fecurity to other places, he will have little reafon to imagine that their numbers have fince increased; and therefore with one third part of that province that prince can have gained no more than one third part of the inhabitants, or 250,000 new subjects, • even even though it fhould be fuppofed they were all contented to live fill in their native country, and transfer their allegiance to a new mafter. The fertility of this province, its convenient fituation for trade and commerce, its capacity for furnishing employment and fubfiftence to great numbers, and the vaft armies that have been maintained here, make it credible that the remaining two thirds of Flanders are equal to all his other conquefts; and confequently by all he cannot have gained more than 750,000 < new fubjects, men, women, and children, efpecially if a deduction thall be made of fuch as have retired from the conqueror to live under their old mafters. It is time now to fet his lofs against his profit, and to fhew for the new fubjects he had acquired, how many old ones he had loft in the acquifition: I think that in his wars he has feldom brought lefs into the field in all places than 200,000 fighting men, befides what have 'been left in garrifons; and I think the common computation is, that of an army, at the end of a campaign, without fieges or battles, fcarce four fifths can be muftered of those that came into the field at the beginning of the C year. His wars at feveral times until the laft ' peace have held about 20 years; and if 40,coo yearly loft, or a fifth part of his armies, are to be multiplied by 20, he cannot have loft lefs than 800,ogo of his old fubjects, and all ablebodied men; a greater number than the new fubjects he had acquired. But this lofs is not all: Providence feems to have equally divided the whole mafs of mankind into different fexes, that every woman may have her hutband, and that both may equally contribute to the continuance of the fpecies. It follows then, that for all the men that have been loft, as many women must have lived fingle, and it were but charity to believe they have not done all the fervice they were capable of doing in their generation. In fo long a courfe of years great part of them must have died, and all the reft must go off at least without leaving any reprefentatives behind. this account he must have loft not only 800,000 fubjects, but double that number, and all the increase that was reafonably to be expected 'from it. By 6 the whole harveft? Parfimony and frugality 'must be ftrangers to fuch a people; for will' any man fave to-day what he has reafon to fear 'will be taken from him to-morrow? And where is the encouragement for marrying? Will any man think of raiûng children, without any affurance of cloathing for their backs, or fo much as food for their bellies? And thus by his fatal ambition he must have leffened the number of his fubjects not only by flaughter and deftruction, but by preventing their very births, he has done as much as was poffible 'towards deftroying pofterity itself. 6 Is this then the great, the invincible Lewis? This the immortal man, the tout-puiflant, or the almighty, as his flatterers have called him? Is this the man that is fo celebrated for his conquefts? For every fubject he has acquired, he has not loft three that were his inheritance? Are not his troops fewer, and thofe neither fo 'well fed, cloathed, or paid, as they were formerly, though he has now fo much greater caufe to exert himfelf? And what can be the reafon of all this, but that his revenue is a great deal lefs, his fubjects are either poorer, or not fo many to be plundered by conftant taxes for • his use? ¿ It is well for him he had found out a way 'to steal a kingdom; if he had gone on conquering as he did before, his ruin had been long fince finished. This brings to my mind a fay'ing of King Pyrrhus, after he had a fecond time beat the Romans in a pitched battle, and was complimented by his Generals: Yes,' fays he, (fuch another victory and and I am quite ' undone.) And fince I have mentioned Pyrrhus, 'I will end with a very good, though known 'ftory of this ambitious madman. When he had fhewn the utmost fondness for his expedition against the Romans, Cyneas his chief 'minifter afked him what he propofed to himfelf by this war? Why, fays Pyrrhus to conquer the Romans, and reduce all Italy to my obedience. What then? fays Cyneas. To 'pass over into Sicily, fays Pyrrhus, and then all the Sicilians must be our fubjects. And what does your majesty intend next? Why truly, 'fays the King, to conquer Carthage and make myfelf master of all Africa. And what, Sir, fays the minifter, is to be the end of all your. 'expeditions? Why then, fays the King, for the reft of our lives we will fit down to good wine. How, Sir, replied Cyneas, to better than we have now before us? Have we not already as much as we can drink? Riot and excefs are not the becoming cha'racters of princes; but if Pyrrhus and Lewis had debauched like Vitellius, they had been lefs hurtful to their people. It is faid in the laft war there was a famine in his kingdom, which fwept away two millions of his people. This is hardly credible; if the lofs was only of one fifth part of that fum, it was very great. But it is no wonder there fhould be famine, where fo much of the people's fubftance' is taken away for the king's ufe, that they have not fufficient left to provide against accidents; where fo many of the men are taken from the plough to ferve the king in T his wars, and a great part of the tillage left to the weaker hands of fo many women and chil'dren. Whatever was the lefs, it muft undoubtedly be placed to the account of his ambition. And fo muft alfo the deftruction or banifhment of 3 or 400,000 of his reformed fubjects; he could have no other reafons for valuing thofe lives fo very cheap, but only to recommend himself to the bigotry of the Spanish nation. How fhould there be induftry in a country where all property is precarious? What fubje&t will fow his land that his prince may reap Your humble Servant, PHILARITHMUS. N° 181. THURSDAY, SEPTEMBER 27. His lacrymis vitam damus, & miferefcimus ultrò. VIRG. n. 2. ver. 145. Mov'd by thefe tears, we pity and protect. AM more pleafed with a letter that is filled with touches of nature than of wit. filowing one is of this kind. The · SIR, Mong all the diftreffes which happen in This inftinct in man is more general and uncircumfcribed than in brutes, as being enlarged A families, I do not remember that you by the dictates of reafon and duty. For if we have touched upon the marriage of children without the confent of their parents. I am one of these unfortunate perfons, I was about 'fifteen when I took the liberty to choose for myself; and have ever fince languished under the displeasure of an inexorable father, who, though he fees me happy in the best of hufbands, and bleffed with very fine children, can never be prevailed upon to forgive me. He was fo kind to me before this unhappy accident, that indeed it makes my breach of duty in fome measure inexcufable; and at the fame <time creates in me fuch a tenderness towards him, that I love him above all things, and would die to be reconciled to him. I have thrown myself at his feet, and befought him ⚫ with tears to pardon me; but he always pushes me away, and fpurns me from him; I have ⚫ written feveral letters to him, but he will neither open nor receive them. About two years < ago I fent my little boy to him, dreffed in a " new apparel; but the child returned to me crying, because he said his grandfather would not fee him, and had ordered him to be put out of his house. My mother is won over to my fide, but dares not mention me to my father for fear of provoking him. About a month ago he lay fick upon his bed, and in great danger of his life: I was pierced to the heart at the news, and could not forbear going to inquire after his health. My mother took this opportunity of fpeaking in my behalf: She told him with abundance of tears, that I was come to see him, that I could not speak to her for weeping, and that I fhould certainly break my heart if he refufed at that time to give me ⚫his blefling, and be reconciled to me. He was fo far from relenting towards me, that he bid her fpeak no more of me, unlefs fhe had a mind to disturb him in his laft moments; for, Sir, you must know that he has the reputation of an honeft and religious man, which 'makes my misfortune much the greater. God be thanked he is fince recovered; but his fevere • ufage has given me fuch a blow, that I fhall foon fink under it, unlefs I may be relieved by any impreffions which the reading of this in your paper may make upon him. " I am, &c.' Of all hardneffes of heart there is none fo inexcufable as that of parents towards their children. An obftinate, inflexible, unforgiving temper is odious upon all occafions; but here it is unnatural. The love, tenderness, and compaffion, which are apt to arife in us towards thofe who depend upon us, is that by which the whole world of life is upheld. The Supreme Being. by the tranfcendent excellency and goodness of his nature, extends his mercy to all his works; and because his creatures have not fuch a fpontaneous benevolence and compaffion towards thofe who are under their care and protection, he has implanted in them an instinct, that fupplies the place of this inherent goodnefs. I have illuftrated this kind of inftinct in former papers, and have shown how it runs through all the fpecies of brute creatures, as indeed the whole aniyal creation fubfifts by it. confider ourselves attentively, we shall find that we are not only inclined to love thofe who defcend from us, but that we bear a kind of copyù, or natural affection, to every thing which relies upon us for its good and prefervation. Dependence is a perpetual call upon humanity, and a greater incitement to tenderness and pity than any other motive whatsoever. The man therefore who, notwithstanding any passion or resentment, can overcome this powerful inftinct, and extinguish natural affection, debafes his mind even below brutality, fruftrates, as much as in him lies, the great defign of Providence, and strikes out of his nature one of the most divine principles that is planted in it. Among innumerable arguments which might be brought against fuch an unreasonable proceeding, I fhall only infift on one. We make it the condition of our forgiveness that we forgive others. In our very prayers we defire no more than to be treated by this kind of retaliation. The cafe therefore before us feems to be what they call a cafe in point;' the relation between the child and father being what comes nearest to that between a creature and his Creator. If the father is inexorable to the child who has offended, let the offence be of never fo high a nature, how will he addrefs himself to the Supreme Being under the tender appellation of a father, and defire of him such a forgiveness as he himself refuses to grant? To this I might add many other religious, as well as many prudential confiderations; but if the last mentioned motive does not prevail, I defpair of fucceeding by any other, and shall therefore conclude my paper with a very remarkable ftory, which is recorded in an old chronicle publifhed by Freher, among the writers of the German hiftory. Eginhart, who was fecretary to Charles the Great, became exceeding popular by his behaviour in that poft. His great abilities gained him the favour of his mafier, and the esteem of the whole court. Imma, the daughter of the Emperor, was fo pleafed with his perfon and converfation, that the fell in love with him. As he was one of the greateft beauties of the age, Eginhart anfwered her with a more than equal return of paffion. They stifled their flames for fome time, under apprehenfion of the fatal confequences that might enfue. Eginhart at length refolving to hazard all, rather than be deprived of one whom his heart was fo much fet upon, conveyed himself one night into the princess's apartment, and knocking gently at the door, was admitted as a perfon who had fomething to communicate to her from the emperor. He was with her in private moft part of the night; but upon his preparing to go away about break of day, he ob ferved that there had fallen a great fnow during his ftay with the princefs. This very much perplexed him, left the prints of his feet in the fnow might make difcoveries to the King, who often ufed to vifit his daughter in the morning. He acquainted the princefs Imma with his fears; who, after fome confultations upon the matter, prevailed upon him to let her carry him through the fnow upon her own fhoulders. It happened that the Emperor not being able to fleep, was at that time up and walking in his chamber,when upon looking through the window he perceived perceived his daughter tottering under her burden, and carrying his first minifter acrofs the fnow; which he had no fooner done, but the returned again with the utmost speed to her own apartment. The Emperor was extremely troubled and aftonifhed at this accident; but refolved to speak nothing of it until a proper opportunity. In the mean time, Eginhart knowing that what he had done could not be long a fecret, determined to retire from court; and in order to it begged the Emperor that he would be pleafed to difmifs him, pretending a kind of difcontent at his not having been rewarded for his long fervices. The Emperor would not give a direct anfwer to his petition, but told him he would think of it, and appointed a certain day when he would let him know his pleasure. He then called together the moft faithful of his counsellors, and acquainting them with his fecretary's crime, afked them their advice in fo delicate an affair. The most of them gave their opinion, that the perfon could not be too feverely punished who had thus difhonoured his mafter. Upon the whole debate, the Emperor declared it was his opinion, that Eginhart's punishment would rather increafe than diminish the fhame of his family, and that therefore he thought it the most advise able to wear out the memory of the fact, by marrying him to his daughter. Accerdingly Eginhart was called in, and acquainted by the Emperor, that he should no longer have any pretence of complaining his fervices were not rewarded, for that the Princefs Imma fhould be given him in marriage, with a dower fuitable to her quality; which was foon after performed accordingly. N° 182. FRIDAY, SEPTEMBER 28. Plus aloes quàm mellis habet L Juv. Sat. 6. ver. 18o. The bitter overbalances the sweet. you to read the naufeous impertinences which are written on thefe occafions, and to fee the filly creatures fighing over them, it could not but be matter of mirth as well as pity. A little 'prentice girl of mine has been for fome time applied to by an Irish fellow, who drefles very fine, and ftruts in a laced coat, and is the admiration of feamftreffes who are under age in town. Ever fince I have had fome knowledge of the matter, I have debarred my 'prentice from pen, ink, and paper. But the other day he bespoke some cra vats of me: I went out of the shop, and left his mistress to put them up into a bandbox in order to be fent to him when his man called. When I came into the fhop again, I took occafion to fend her away, and found in the bottom of the box written these words, "Why would you ruin "a harmless creature that loves you?" then in the lid, "There no refiting Strephon:" I fearched a little farther, and found in the rim of the box, "At eleven o'Clock at night come "in an hackney coach at the end of our ftreet.” This was enough to alarm me; I fent away the things, and took my measures accordingly. An hour or two before the appointed time I examined my young lady, and found her trunk ftuffed with impertinent letters, and an old feroll of parch ment in Latin, which her lover had fent her as a fettlement of fifty pounds a year: among other things, there was alfo the beft lace I had in my fhop to make him a prefent for cravats. I was very glad of this laft circumftance, because I could very confcientiously fwear against him that he had enticed my fervant away, and was her accomplice in robbing me: I procured a warrant against him accordingly. Every thing was now prepared, and the tender hour of love approaching, I, who had acted for myself in my youth the fame fenfelefs part, knew how to manage accordingly: therefore, after having locked up my maid, and not being fo much unlike her in height and fhape, as in a huddled way not to pafs for her, I delivered the bundle defigned to be carried off to her lover's man, who came with the fignal to receive them. Thus I followed after to the coach, where when I faw his mafter take them in, I cried out thieves! thieves and the conftable with his attendants feized my expecting lover. I kept myfelf unobferved until I faw the crowd fufficiently increased, and then appeared to declare the goods to be mine; and had the fatisfaction to fee my man of mode put into the Round-Houfe, with • have not mentioned that of wenching, and parti-the ftolen wares by him, to be produced in evi cularly the infnaring part; I mean, that it is a thing very fit for your pen, to expofe the villainy of the practice of deluding women. You are to know, Sir, that I myself am a woman who have been one of the unhappy that have fallen intò this misfortune, and that by the infinuation of a very worthlefs fellow, who ferved others in the fame manner both before my ruin and fince that time. I had, as foon as the rafcal left me, fo • much indignation and resolution, as not to go upon the town, as the phrafe is, but took to work for my living in an obfcure place, out of the knowledge of all with whom I was before ac• quainted. It is the ordinary practice and business of life, with a fet of idle fellows about this town, to write letters, fend meffages, and form appoint⚫ments with little raw unthinking girls, and leave ⚫ them after poffeffion of them, without any mercy, to shame, infamy, poverty, and disease. Were dence against him the next morning. This matter is notoriously known to be fact; and I have been contented to fave my 'prentice, and take a year's rent of this mortified lover, not to appear farther in the matter. This was fome penance: but, Sir, is this enough for a villainy of much more pernicious confequence than the trifles for which he was to have been indicted? Should not you, and all men of any parts or honour, put things upon fo right a foot, as that such a raícal fhould not laugh at the imputation of what he was really guilty, and dread of being accused of that for which he was arrested? In a word, Sir, it is in the power of you, and fuch as I hope you are, to make it as infamous to rob a poor creature of her honour as her clothes. I leave this to your confideration, only take leave (which I cannot do without fighing) to remark to you, that if this had been the fente • of |