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garter'd, a Fashion she detests : And he will smile upon her, which will now be so unsuitable to her Disposition, being addicted to Melancholy, as she is, that it cannot but turn him into a notable Contempt : If you will see it, follow me.
Sir To. To the Gates, Tartar, thou most excellent Devil of Wit. Sir And. I'll make one too.
A CT III. SCEN E I.
SCENE A Garden.
Enter Viola and Clown.
O live by the Tabor ?
Clo. No such matter, Sir, I do live by the Church: For I do live at my House, and my House doth stand by the Church.
Vio. So thou may'ft say the King lyes by a Beggar, if : Beggar dwell near him: Or the Church stands by thy Ta' bor, if thy Tabor stand by the Church.
Clo. You have said, Sir: To see this Age! A Sentence is but a chev'ril Glove to a good Wit; how quickly the wrong side may be turn'd outward.
Vio. Nay, that's certain; they that dally nicely with Words, may quickly make them wanton.
Clo. I would therefore my Sister had no Name, Sir.
Clo. Why, Sir, her Name's a word, and to dally with that word,might make my Sister wanton : But indeed. Words are very Rascals, since Bonds disgrac'd them.
Vio. Thy Reason, Man?
Clo. Troth, Sir, I can yield you none without Words and Words are grown so false, I am loath to prove Realor with them.
Vio. I warrant thou art a merry Fellow, and carest for nothing.
Clo. Not so, Sir, I do care for something; but, in my Conscience, Sir, I do not care for you: If that be to care for nothing, Sir, I would it would make you invisible.
Vio. Art not thou the Lady Olivia's Fool?
Clo. No indeed, Sir, the Lady Olivia has no Folly, she will keep no Fool, Sir, 'till she be married; and Fools are as like Husbands, as Pilchers are to Herrings, the Husband's the bigger : I am indeed not her Fool, but her corrupter of Words.
Vio. I saw thee late at the Duke Orsino's.
Clo. Foolery, Sir, he does walk about the Orb like the Sun, it shines every where. I would be sorry, Sir, but the Fool should be as oft with your Master, as with my Mistrels : I think I saw your Wisdom there.
Vio. Nay, and thou pass upon me, I'll no more with chee. Hold, there's Expences for thee.
Clo. Now Jove, in his next Commodity of Hair, send thee a Beard.
Vio. By my troth, I'll tell thee, I am almost fick for one, though I would not have it grow on my Chin. Is thy Lady within?
Clo. Would not a pair of these have bred, Sir ?
Sir, to bring a Cressida to this Troylus.
Vio. I understand you, Sir, 'tis well begg’d.
Clo. The matter I hope is not great, Sir; begging, but a Beggar : Cressida was a Beggar. My Lady is within, Sir. I will conster to them whence you come, who you are, and what you would is out of my Welkin, I might say, Element, but the word is over-worn.
[Exit. Vro. This Fellow is wise enough to play the Fool,
And to do that well craves a kind of Wit : dale He must observe their Mood on whom he Jests, But The Quality of the Persons, and the Time; hem And like the Haggard, check at every Feather
That comes before his Eye. This is a pra&ice Gout As full of Labour as a Wise-man's Art:
For Folly that he wisely shews, is fit;
Enter Sir Toby and Sir Andrew.
Sir And. Dieu vous guard Monsieur.
Sir To. Will you encounter the House, my Neice is desirous you should enter, if your Trade be to her.
Vio. I am bound to your Neice, Sir; I mean, she is the List of my Voyage.
Sir To, Taste your Legs, Sir, put them to motion.
Vio. My Legs do better understand me, Sir, than I under stand what you mean by bidding me taste my Legs.
Sir To. I mean to go, Sir, to enter.
Vio. I will answer you with Gate and Entrance, but we are prevented.
Enter Olivia and Maria. . Most excellent accomplish'd Lady, the Heav'ns rain Odours on you.
Sir And. That Youth's a rare Courtier! rain Odours!
Vio. My Matter hath oo Voice, Lady, but to your own most pregnant and vouchsafed Ear.
Sir And. Odours, pregnant and vouchsafed : I'll get 'em all three ready.
Oli. Let the Garden Door be shut, and leave me to my
Vio. My Duty, Madam, and most humble Service.
Oli. My Servant, Sir? 'Twas never merry World,
Vio. And he is yours, and his must needs be yours:
Oli. For him I think not on him: For his Thoughts,
Vio. Madam, I come to whet your gentle Thoughts
Oli. O, by your leave, I pray you; I bade you never speak again of him. But would you undertake another Suit, I had rather hear you to soilicit that, Than Musick from the Spheres.'
V10. Dear Lady.
Oli. Give me leave, I beseech you: I did send,
Vio. I pity you.
Vio. No not a grice: For 'tis a vulgar Proof
Oli. Why then methinks 'cis time to smile again;
Vio. Then Westward hoe :
Oli. Stay; I prethee tell me what thou think'st of me?
Vio. Would it be better, Madam, than I am? I wish it might, for now I am your Fool.
Oli. O what a deal of Scorn looks beautiful,
Vio. By Innocence I swear, and by my Youth,
Oli, Yet come again; for thou perhaps may'st move
[Exeunt. SCENE II. Olivia's House.
Enter Sir Toby, Sir Andrew, and Fabian. Sir And, No faith, I'll not stay a jot longer.' Sir To. Thy Reason, dear Venom, give thy Reason. Fab. You must needs yield your Reason, Sir Andrew.
Sir And. Marry, I saw your Neice do more Favours to the Duke's Serving-man, than ever she bestow'd upon me. I saw't i'th’Orchard.
Sir To, Did she see thee the while, old Boy, tell me that?
Sir And. As plain as I see you now.
Sir And. 'Slight ; will you make an Ass o'me?
Fab. I prove it legitimate, Sir, upon the Oaths of Judg: ment and Reason,