The MisreadBible: JoshuaPicking up where Moses popped off, The MisreadBible: Joshua continues the blasphemously brilliant retelling of the Bible with a fresh take on the blood-soaked conquest of Canaan. With the Israelites finally poised to enter the Promised Land, the unenviable task of leading them now falls to Joshua. Alongside his overzealous sidekick Caleb, a host of battle-unready Israelites, and an increasingly erratic deity, Joshua must conquer cities, divvy up land, and somehow manage to sleep at night. From the walls of Jericho to the allocation of goat-infested hill country, this irreverent parody dives headfirst into the morally murky waters of holy war, all while skewering the contradictions, loopholes, and divine double standards of the original text. |
Common terms and phrases
Abel-Shittim Achan Achor Valley Achsah Aczib Aijalon Amorites Anakite angel anyway army asked battle began Joshua Beth Bethel bloody Caleb camp Canaan Canaanites chariots commanders continued cross the Jordan Debir Egypt elders Eleazar enslave Ephraim eyes forwards Gadite giant Gibeon Gibeonites Gilgal God's going groaned Joshua grumbled hands head Hebron hill country Hivites instructed interjected invade Israel Israelites Jericho Joshua called Joshua rolled Judah Judahites king land laughed Levite look LORD LORD's Makkedah Manasseh Manassehites marry Merom Moses Mount Mount Ebal Mount Gerizim muttered objected Joshua Okay Othniel Phinehas piss priests Rahab replied Caleb replied Joshua Reubenite river Shiloh shit sighed Joshua Simeonites snarked Joshua soldiers sorry spat stones stood stopped strong and courageous sure sword tell Tent of Fuck there's took town Transjordan treaty tribes troops trumpets turned whole yelled Zarethan