keep commendations from being infipid to men's tafte, or raillery pernicious to their characters.

Mr. BICKER STAFF,

A

Sept. 30.

SI always looked upon fatire as the best friend to reformation, whilft its lafhes were general; "fo that Gentleman * muft excufe me, if I do not fee "the inconvenience of a method he is fo much con"cerned at. The errors he affigns in it, I think, are

comprifed" in the defperation men are generally driven to, when by a public detection they fall under the infamy they feared, who otherwife, by checking their bridle, might have recovered their ftumble, and through a felf-conviction become their own reformers: So he that was before but a clandeftine difciple, (to use his own quotation) is now become a Doctor in impiety. "The little fuccefs that is to be expected by these me"thods from a hardened offender, is too evident to in"fift on; yet it is true, there is a great deal of charity

in this fort of reafoning, whilft the effects of those "crimes extend not beyond themselves. But what re"lation has this to your proceedings? It is not a circum"ftantial gueffing will ferve the turn, for there are more

than one to pretend to any of your characters; but there muft at leaft be fomething that must amount to "a nominal defcription, before even common fame can feparate me from the reft of mankind to dart at. A general reprefentation of an action, either ridiculous or enormous, may make those which we find too "much fimilitude in the character with themselves to plead not guilty; but none but a witnefs to the crime can charge them with the guilt, whilft the indi&ment is general, and the offender has the afylum of the "whole world to protect him. Here can then be no injustice, where no one is injured; for it is themfelves must appropriate the faddle, before fcandal can "ride them.

"Your method then, in my opinion, is no way fub. "ject to the charge brought against it; but on the con66 trary, I believe this advantage is too often drawn *See Tatler, N° 74. September 29.

"" from

"from it, that whilft we laugh at, or deteft, the un"certain fubject of the fatire, we often find fomething "in the error a parallel to ourselves; and being infen"fibly drawn to the comparifon we would get rid of, "we plunge deeper into the mire, and fhame produces "that which advice has been too weak for; and you, "Sir, get converts you never thought of.

66

"As for defcending to characters below the dignity of fatire; what men think are not beneath commiffion, "I muft affure him, I think are not beneath reproof: "For as there is as much folly in a ridiculous deportment, as there is enormity in a criminal one, fo "neither the one nor the other ought to plead exemp"tion. The kennel of curs are as much enemies to "the ftate, as Greg for his confederacy; for as this betrayed our government, fo the other does our pro"perty, and one without the other is equally useless. "As for the act of oblivion he fo ftrenuously infilts on, "Le Roy s'avifera is a fashionable answer; and for "his modus of panegyric, the hint was unneceffary, "where virtue need never afk twice for her laurel. "But as for his reformation by oppofites, I again muft "afk his pardon, if I think the effects of thefe fort of reafonings, by the paucity of converts, are too great an argument, both of their imbecillity and unfuc"cessfulness, to believe it will be any better than mif"pending of time, by fufpending a method that will

turn more to advantage, and which has no other "danger of lofing ground, but by difcontinuance. "And as I am certain, of what he fuppofes, that your "Lucubrations are intended for the public benefit; "fo I hope you will not give them fo great an inter"ruption, by laying afide the only method that can "render you beneficial to mankind, and, among others, "agreeable to,

Sir,

Your humble fervant, &c.

i, e. the King will confider of it.

H 3

St.

St. James's Coffee-house, October 3.

Letters from the camp at Havre of the seventh inftant, N. S. advife, that the trenches were opened before Mons on the twenty-seventh of the last month, and the approaches were carried on at two attacks with great application and fuccefs, notwithstanding the rains which had fallen; that the befiegers had made themselves mafters of feveral redoubts, and other outworks, and had advanced the approaches within ten paces of the counterfcarps of the hornwork. Lieutenant-General Cadogan received a flight wound in the neck foon after opening

the trenches.

men.

The enemy were throwing up intrenchments between Quefney and Valenciennes, and the Chevalier de Luxemburg was encamped near Charleroy with a body of ten thousand Advices from Catalonia by the way of Genoa import, that Count Staremberg having paffed the Segra, advanced towards Balaguier, which place he took after a few hours resistance, and made the garrifon, confifting of three Spanish battalions, prifoners of war. Letters from Bern fay, that the army under the command of Count Thaun had began to repafs the mountains, and would fhortly evacuate Savoy.

"Whereas Mr. Bickerstaff has received intelligence, "that a young Gentleman, who has taken my difcourfes upon John Partridge and others in too literal a sense, and is fuing an elder brother to an ejectment; the "aforefaid young Gentleman is hereby advised to drop his action, no man being esteemed dead in law, who "eats and drinks, and receives his rents."

Thursday

N°

77. Thursday, October 6, 1709.

From my own Apartment, October 5.

S bad as the world is, I find by very strict observation upon virtue and vice, that if men appeared no worse than they really are, I fhould have lefs work than at present I am obliged to undertake for their reformation. They have generally taken up a kind of inverted ambition, and affect even faults and imperfections of which they are innocent. The other day in a coffeehoufe I ftood by a young heir, with a fresh, fanguine, and healthy look, who entertained us with an account of his claps and his diet-drink; though, to my know.. ledge, he is as found as any of his tenants.

This worthy youth put me into reflections upon that fubject; and I obferved the fantastical humour to be so general, that there is hardly a man who is not more or lefs tainted with it. The first of this order of men are the Valetudinarians, who are never in health; but complain of want of ftomach or reft every day until noon, and then devour all which comes before them. Lady Dainty is convinced, that it is neceflary for a Gentlewoman to, be out of order; and to preserve that character, she dines every day in her closet at twelve, that fhe may become. her table at two, and be unable to eat in public. About five years ago, I remember it was the fashion to be shortfighted. A man would not own an acquaintance until he had firft examined him with his glafs. At a Lady's entrance into the play-house, you might fee tubes immediately levelled at her from every quarter of the pit and fide-boxes. However, that mode of infirmity is out, and the age has recovered its fight: But the blind seem to be fucceeded by the lame, anda janty limp is the prefent beauty. I think I have formerly obferved, a cane is part of the drefs of a prig, and always worn upon: a button,

H 4

Be

a button, for fear he should be thought to have an occafion for it, or be esteemed really, and not genteely a cripple. I have confidered, but could never find out the bottom of his vanity. I indeed have heard of a Gascon General, who by the lucky grazing of a bullet on the roll of his ftocking, took occafion to halt all his life after. But as for our peaceable cripples,' I know no foundation for their behaviour, without it may be fuppofed that in this warlike age, fome think a cane the next honour to a wooden leg. This fort of affectation I have known run from one limb or member to another. fore the Limpers came in, I remember a race of Lifpers, fine perfons, who took an averfion to particular letters in our language: Some never uttered the letter H; and others had as mortal an averfion to S. Others have had their fashionable defect in their ears, and would make you repeat all you faid twice over. I know an ancient friend of mine, whofe table is every day furrounded with flatterers, that makes ufe of this, fometimes as a piece of grandeur, and at others as an art, to make them repeat their commendations. Such affectations have been indeed in the world in ancient times; but they fell into them out of politic ends. Alexander the Great had a wry neck, which made it the fashion in his court to carry their heads on one fide when they came into the prefence. One who thought to outfhine the whole court, carried his head fo over complaifantly, that this martial Prince gave him fo great a box on the ear, as fet all the heads of the court upright.

1 his humour takes place in our minds as well as bodies. I know at this time a young Gentleman, who talks atheistically all day in coffee-houfes, and in his degrees of understanding fets up for a Free thinker; though it can be proved upon him, he fays his prayers every morning and evening. But this clafs of modern Wits I fhall referve for a chapter by itself.

Of the like turn are all your Marriage-haters, who rail at the noose, at the words, " for ever and aye," and at the fame time are fecretly pining for fome young Thing or other that makes their hearts ake by her refufal. The next to these, are such as pretend to govern their wives, and boaft how ill they ufe them; when at

the