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Lor. Sir.

Enter LORENZO.

Leon. Go, take down all the hangings, And pack up all my clothes, my plate and jewels, And all the furniture that's portable. Sir, when we lie in garrison, 'tis necessary We keep a handsome port, for the king's honour; And, do you hear, let all your lady's wardrobe Be safely placed in trunks. They must along too. Lor. Whither must they go, sir? Leon. To the wars, Lorenzo,

And you and all; I will not leave a turn-spit, That has one dram of spleen against a Dutchman. Lor. Why then, St Jaques! hey, you have made us all, sir,

And if we leave you- -does my lady go too? Leon. The stuff must go to-morrow towards the sea, sir.

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The goodness of your mind and mine own duty,
But lose you instantly, be divorced from me?
This is a cruelty. I'll to the king,
And tell him 'tis unjust to part two souls,
Two minds so nearly mixt.

Leon. By no means, sweetheart.
Marg. If he were married but four days as I am-
Leon. He would hang himself the fifth, or fly
his country.
[Aside.
Marg. He would make it treason for that
tongue that durst

But talk of war, or any thing to vex him.
You shall not go.

Leon. Indeed, I must, sweet wife.
What! shall I lose the king for a few kisses?
We'll have enough.

Marg. I'll to the duke, my cousin ; he shall to the king.

Leon. He did me this great office,

I thank his grace for't; should I pray him now, To undo't again? Fye, 'twere a base discredit.

Marg. Would I were able, sir, to bear you

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Coachm. Must the coach go too, sir?

Leon. How will your lady pass to th' sea else easily?

We shall find shipping for't there to transport it. Marg. I go? alas!

Leon. I'll have a main care of you,

I know you are sickly; he shall drive the easier, And all accommodation shall attend you.

Marg. Would I were able.

Leon. Come, I warrant you,

Am not I with you, sweet? Are her clothes packed up,

And all her linen? Give your maids direction; You know my time's but short, and I am commanded.

Marg. Let me have a nurse,

And all such necessary people with me,
And an easy bark.

Leon. It shall not trot, I warrant you;
Curvet it may sometimes.

Marg. I am with child, sir.

Leon. At four days warning? This is something speedy;

Do you conceive, as our jennets do, with a west wind?

My heir will be an arrant fleet one, lady.
I'll swear you were a maid when I first lay with you.
Marg. Pray, do not swear; I thought I was a
maid too,

But we may both be cozen'd in that point, sir. Leon In such a strait point, sure, I could not err, madam..

Juan. This is another tenderness to try him. Fetch her up now.

Marg. You must provide a cradle, and what a trouble's that?

Leon. The sea shall rock it,

'Tis the best nurse; 'twill roar and rock together, A swinging storm will sing you such a lullaby! Marg. Faith, let me stay, I shall but shame you, sir.

Leon. An' you were a thousand shames you shall along with me,

At home I am sure you'll prove a million;
Every man carries the bundle of his sins
Upon his own back; you are mine, I'll sweat for
you.

Enter Duke, Alonzo, SanchiO.

Duke. What, sir, preparing for your noble journey?

'Tis well, and full of care.

I saw your mind was wedded to the war,
And knew you would prove some good man for

your country;

Therefore, fair cousin, with your gentle pardon,
I got this place. What, mourn at his advancement?
You are to blame; he will come again, sweet
cousin.

Meantime, like sad Penelope, and sage,
Amongst your maids at home, and housewifely-
Leon. No, sir, I dare not leave her to that so-
litariness.

She is young; and grief or ill news from those quarters

May daily cross her; she shall go along, sir.
Duke. By no means, captain.

Leon. By all means, an't please you.

Duke. What, take a young and tender-bodied lady,

And expose her to those dangers, and those tumults?

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Juan. Michael van Owle, how dost thou?
In what dark barn or tod of aged ivy
Hast thou lain hid?

Per. Things must both ebb and flow, colonel,
And people must conceal, and shine again.
You are welcome hither, as your friend may say,
gentlemen ;

A pretty house, ye see, handsomely seated, Sweet and convenient walks, the waters crystal. Alon. He's certain mad.

Juan. As mad as a French tailor,

That has nothing in's head but ends of fustians. Per. I see you are packing, now, my gentle

cousin,

And my wife told me I should find it so ;
'Tis true I do; you were merry when I was last
here,

But 'twas your will to try my patience, madam.
I am sorry that my swift occasions
Can let you take your pleasure here no longer;
Yet, I would have you think, my honoured cousin,
This house and all I have are all your servants.
Leon. What house, what pleasure, sir; what
do you mean?

Per. You hold the jest so stiff, 'twill prove dis

courteous.

This house I mean, the pleasures of this place. Leon. And what of them?

Per. They are mine, sir, and you know it, My wife's I mean, and so conferr'd upon me. The hangings, sir, I must entreat your servants, That are so busy in their offices,

Again to minister to their right uses.

I shall take view o' th' plate, anon, and furnitures, That are of under place. You are merry still, cousin,

And of a pleasant constitution.

Men of great fortunes make their mirths ad pla

citum.

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I'll have it proved if you were never yet in Bedlam, Never in love, for that's a lunacy;

No great estate left you that you never looked for, Nor cannot manage, that's a rank distemper; That you were christen'd, and who answered for

you;

And then I yield.

Per. He's half persuaded me, I was bred i' th' moon:

I have ne'er a bush at my breech? Are not we both mad,

And is not this a fantastic house we are in,
And all a dream we do? Will you walk out, sir,
And if I do not beat thee presently
Into a sound belief as sense can give thee,
Brick me into that wall there for a chimney piece,
And say I was one o' th' Cæsars, done by a seal-

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And saving of your wife.

Leon. All this not moves me, Nor stirs my gall, nor alters my affections. You have more furniture, more houses, lady, And rich ones too; I will make bold with those. And you have land i' th' Indies, as I take it; Thither we'll go, and view a while those climates, Visit your factors there, that may betray you. 'Tis done; we must go.

Marg. Now, thou art a brave gentleman,
And by this sacred light I love thee dearly.-
The house is none of yours; I did but jest, sir,
Nor you are no coz of mine; I beseech you
vanish.

I tell you plain; you have no more right than he has,
Your wife has once more
That senseless thing.
fooled you:

Go you, and consider.

Leon. Good morrow, my sweet cousin! I should be glad, sir

Per. By this hand, she dies for't, Or any man that speaks for her. Juan. These are fine toys.

[Exit PER.

Marg. Let me request you stay but one poor month;

You shall have a commission, and I'll go too.
Give me but will so far.

Leon. Well, I will try you;

Good-morrow to your grace, we have private business.

Duke. If I miss thee again, I am an arrant bungler.

Juan. Thou shalt have my command, and I'll march under thee;

Nay, be thy boy, before thou shalt be baffled;
Thou art so brave a fellow.

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ACT V.

SCENE I.

Enter LEON, with a Letter, and MARGARITA. Leon. Come hither, wife; do you know this hand? Marg. I do, sir.

'Tis Estifania, that was once my woman,

Leon. She writes to me here, that one Cacafogo,

An usuring jeweller's son, (I know the rascal)
Is mortally fallen in love with you.

Marg. He is a monster; deliver me from
mountains!

Leon. Do you go a-birding for all sorts of people?

And this evening will come to you, and shew you jewels,

And offers any thing to get access to you.
If I can make or sport or profit on him,
For he is fit for both, she bids me use him;
And so I will, be you conformable, and follow but
my will.

Marg. I shall not fail, sir.

Leon. Will the duke come again, do you think? Marg. No, sure, sir,

He has now no policy to bring him hither. Leon. Nor bring you to him, if my wit hold, fair wife: Let's in to dinner. [Exeunt.

Enter PEREZ.

Per. Had I but lungs enough to bawl suff

ciently,

That all the queans in Christendom might hear me,
That men might run away from the contagion,
I had my wish; would it were most high treason,
Most infinite high, for any man to marry,

I mean for any man that would live handsomely,
And like a gentleman, in his wits and credit.
What torments shall I put her to? Phalaris' bull
now?

Pox, they love bulling too well, though they smoke for it.

Cut her a-pieces? every piece will live still,

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But art thou cheated? minister some comfort:
Tell me directly, art thou cheated bravely?
Come, prithee come, art thou so pure a coxcomb,
To be undone! do not dissemble with me,
Tell me I conjure thee.

Cac. Then keep thy circle,

For I am a spirit wild that flies about thee,
And whoe'er thou art, if thou beʼst human,
I'll let thee plainly know, I am cheated damnably.
Per. Ha, ha, ha!

Cac. Dost thou laugh? damnably, I say most damnably.

Per. By whom, good spirit, speak, speak, ha, ha, ha!

Cac. I will utter, laugh till thy lungs crack, by a rascal woman,

A lewd, abominable, and plain woman.—
Dost thou laugh still?

Per. I must laugh, prithee pardon me,
I shall laugh terribly!

Cac. I shall be angry, terribly angry, I have

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sure,

Do you mark their waters?

Cac. Quicksand choak their waters,

And hers that brought 'em too! but I shall find her.

Per. And so shall I, I hope, but do not hurt her. You cannot find in all this kingdom, (If you have need of cozening, as you may have, For such gross natures will desire it often, 'Tis at some time too a fine variety,) A woman that can cozen ye so neatly. She has taken half mine anger off with this trick, [Exit.

Cac. If I were valiant now, I would kill this
fellow.

I have money enough lies by me at a pinch
Το pay for twenty rascal's lives that vex me.
I'll to this lady, there I shall be satisfied. [Exit.
Enter LEON and MARGARITA.

Leon. Come, we'll away unto your country-
house,

And thore we'll learn to live contentedly;
This place is full of charge, and full of hurry,
No part of sweetness dwells about these cities.
Marg. Whither you will, I wait upon your
pleasure;

Live in a hollow tree, sir, I'll live with ye.

Leon. Ay, now you strike a harmony, a true one, When your obedience waits upon your husband, And your sick will aims at the care of honour. Why now I doat upon ye, love ye dearly, And my rough nature falls like roaring streams, Clearly and sweetly into your embraces. O what a jewel is a woman excellent, A wise, a virtuous, and a noble woman! When we meet such, we bear our stamps on both sides,

And through the world we hold our current vir

tues.

Alone we are single medals, only faces,
And wear our fortunes out in useless shadows;
Command you now, and ease me of that trouble,
I'll be as humble to you as a servant.

Bid whom you please, invite your noble friends,
They shall be welcome all, visit acquaintance,
Go at your pleasure, now experience
Has link'd you fast unto the chain of goodness:
What noise is this, what dismal cry ?

[Clashing swords. A cry within, down
with their swords.

Marg. 'Tis loud too.

Sure there's some mischief donc i' th' street; look out there.

Leon. Look out and help!

Enter a Servant.

Serv. Oh, sir, the duke Medina !Leon. What of the duke Medina? Serv. Oh, sweet gentleman, is almost slain. Marg. Away, away, and help him, all the house help. [Exit Servant. Leon. How, slain? why Margarita, Why, wife! sure some new device they have on foot again,

Some trick upon my credit; I shall meet it.
I had rather guard a ship imperial

Alone, and in a storm, than rule one woman !

Enter Duke, MARGARITA, SANCHIO, ALONZO,

Servant.

Marg. How came ye hurt, sir?
Duke. I fell out with my friend, the noble co-
lonel,

My cause was nought, for 'twas about your honour:
And he that wrongs the innocent ne'er prospers,
And he has left me thus; for charity,
Lend me a bed to ease my tortur'd body,
That ere I perish I may show my penitence;
I fear I am slain.

Leon. Help, gentlemen, to carry him;
There shall be nothing in my house, my lord,
But as your own.

Duke. I thank ye, noble sir,

Leon. To bed with him, and, wife, give your at

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And paid some desperate debts you never look'd for?

Marg. You have done handsomely, I must con

fess, sir.

Leon. Have I not kept thee waking like a hawk? And watch'd thee with delights to satisfy thee, The very tithes of which had won a widow? Marg. Alas, I pity thee!

Leon. Thou wilt make me angry, Thou never saw'st me mad yet. Marg. You are always,

You carry a kind of bedlam still about ye.
Leon. If thou pursu'st me further, I run stark
mad.

If you have more hurt dukes or gentlemen,
To lye here on your cure, I shall be desperate;
I know the trick, and you shall feel I know it;
Are ye so hot that no hedge can contain ye?
I'll have thee let blood in all the veins about thee,
I'll have thy thoughts found too, and have them
open'd,

Thy spirits purg'd, for those are they that fire ye;
Thy maid shall be thy mistress, thou the maid,
And all those servile labours thou shalt reach at,
And go through cheerfully, or else sleep empty:
That maid shall lye by me to teach you duty,
You in a pallet by to humble ye,
And grieve for what you lose.

Marg. I have lost myself, sir,

And all that was my base self, disobedience.

[Kneels. My wantonness, my stubbornness I have lost too, And now by that pure faith good wives are crown'd with,

By your own nobleness

Enter ALTEA.

Leon. I take ye up, and wear ye next my heart; See you be worth it:-Now what with you? Alt. I come to tell my lady,

There is a fulsome fellow would fain speak with her.

Leon. 'Tis Cacafogo, go and entertain him, And draw him on with hopes.

Marg. I shall observe ye.

Leon. I have a rare design upon that gentleman, And you must work too-

Alt. I shall, sir, most willingly.

Leon. Away then both, and keep him close in

some place

From the duke's sight; and keep the duke in too: Make 'em believe both, I'll find time to cure 'em. [Exeunt.

Enter PEREZ, and ESTIFANIA, with a Pistol and a Dagger.

Per. Why how dar'st thou meet me again, thou rebel,

And know'st how thou hast used me thrice, thou rascal?

Were there not ways enough to fly my vengeance,
No holes nor vaults to hide thee from my fury,
But thou must meet me face to face to kill thee?
I would not seek thee to destroy thee willingly,
But now thou com'st to invite me,
And com'st upon me.

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