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Enter Moody, with a candle and sealing wax.
Moody speaking without. Moody. I have been detained by a sparkish Mooily. But I must and will see him, let him coxcomb, who pretended to visit me, but I fear have what company he will. 'twas to my wife. (Aside.] What, have you done? Lucy. As I hope to be married, Mr Belville, I Peg. Ay, ay, Bud, just now.
hear Mr Moody's voice-Where shall I hide myMoody. Let's see't; what do you tremble for? self ?—if he sees me, we are all undone.
[He opens and reads the first letter. Belo. This is our cursed luck again—What Peg. So I had been served if I had given him the devil can he want here? I have lost my senses this.
(Aside. -get into this closet till he's gone. (Puts LUCY Moody. Come, where's the wax and seal ? into the closet.] This visit means something ; I
Peg. Lord, what shall I do now? Nay, then I am quite confounded-Don't you stir, Lucy-I have it.—[ Aside.] Pray let me see't. Lord, you must put the best face upon the matter-Now think me so arrant a fool, I cannot seal a letter; for it
[Takes a book and reads. I will do't, so I will. (Snatches the letter from him, changes it for the other, seals it, and de
Enter Moody. liders it to him.
Moody. You will excuse me, sir, for breaking Moody. Nay, I believe you will learn that and through forms, and your servant's entreaties, to other things too, which I would not have you. have the honour—but you are alone, sir-your
Peg. So, ha'n't I done it curiously? I think I fellow told me below that you were with comhave there's my letter going to Mr Belville, pany. since he'll needs have me send letters to folks. Belo. Yes, sir, the best company. (Shews his
(Aside. book.] When I converse with my betters, I choose Moody. 'Tis very well, but I warrant you to have 'em alone. would not have it go now?
Movdy. And I chose to interrupt your converPeg. Yes, indeed, but I would, Bud, now. sation ! the business of my errand must plead my
Moody. Well, you are a good girl then. Come, excuse. let me lock you up in your chamber, till I come Belo. You shall be always welcome to me; but back; and be sure you come not within three
you seemn ruffled, sir; what brings you hither, strides of the window, when I am gone; for I and seemingly out of humour? have a spy in the street. (Puts her into the cham Moody. Your impertinency-I beg pardonber.) At least 'tis fit she thinks so ; if we do not your modesty, I mean. cheat women, they'll cheat us.-Now I have se Belv. My impertinency! cured all within, I'll deal with the foe without, Moody. Your impertinency. with false intelligence.
Belv. Sir, from the peculiarity of your characSCENE III.-Changes to Belville's Lodgings. low you great privileges ; but you must consider,
ter, and your intimacy with my uncle, I shall alEnter LUCY and BELVILLE.
youth has its privileges too ; and as I have not the Lucy. I run great risks, to be sure, to serve honour of your acquaintance, I'm not oblig'd to the young lady, and you, sir—but I know you are bear with your ill humours, or your ill manners. a gentleman of honour, and would scorn to be
Moody. They who wrong me, young man, must tray a friend who means you well, and is above bear with both! and if you had not made too being mercenary.
free with me, I should have taken no liberties Beld. As you are not mercenary, Mrs Lucy, I with you, ought to be the more generous-give me leave
Belv. I could have wish’d, sir, to have found to present you with this trifle, [Gives a ring] not you a little more civil, the first time I have the as a reward for your services, but as a small token honour of a visit from you. of friendship.
Moody. If that's all you want, young gentleLucy. Tho' I scorn to be bribed in any cause, man, you will find me very civil indeed! There, yet I am proud to accept it, as a mark of your sir, read that, and let your modesty declare wheregard, and as such shall keep it for your sakem
ther I want either kindness or civility-Look and now to business.
[Gives 'a letter. Belo. But has the dear creature resolved ? Belo. What is it?
Lucy. Has shewby, she will run away and Moody. Only a love-letter, sir ;- and from marry you in spite of your teeth, the first moment she can break prison--so you, in your turn,
Belo. How, is it from your wife?-hum and must take care not to have your qualms—I have hum
[Reads. known several bold gentlemen not able to draw Moody. Even from my wife, sir; am I not their swords, when a challenge has come too wonderous kind and civil to you now? But you'll quick upon 'em.
not think her so.
(Aside. Belv. I assure you, Mrs Lucy, that I am no Belo. Ha! Is this a trick of his or hers? [ Aside. bully in love, and Miss Peggy will meet with her Moody. The gentleman's surpris'd, I find. match, come when she will.
What, you expected a kinder letter? Lucy. Ay, so you all say, but talking does no Belo. No, faith, not I; how could I? business—Stay at home till you hear from us. Moody. Yes, yes, I'm sure you did: a man
Belo. Blessings on thee, Lucy, the thought. so young, and well made as you are, must neede
you there, sir.
be disappointed, if the women declare not their Spark. Nay, nay, you shall hear my story out. passiun at the first sight or opportunity.
-She walk'd up within pistol-shot of the Beld. But what should this mean? It seems he church-then twiri'd round upon her heelknows not what the letter contains. [Aside. call’d me every name she could think of; and
Moody. Come, ne'er wonder at it so much. when she had exhausted her imagination, and Belo. Faith, I cann't help it.
tir'd her tongue-no easy matter, let me tell Moody. Now, I think, I have deserv'd your in-you-she call’d her chair, sent her footman to finite friendship and kindness, and have shew'd buy a monkey before my face, then bid me goodmyself sufficiently an obliging kind friend and morrow with a sneer, and left us with our mouths husband-am I not so, to bring a letter from my open in the middle of a hundred people, who wife to her gallant?
were all laughing at us! If these are not tanBelo. Ay, indeed, you are the most obliging trums, I don't know what they are. kind friend and husband in the world ; ha, ha, Moody. Ha, ha, ha! I thank thee, Sparkish, ha, ha! Pray, however, present my humble ser from my soul; 'tis a most exquisite story; I vice to her, and tell her, I will obey her letter to have not had such a laugh for this half yeara tittle, and fulfil her desires, be wliat they will, Thou art a most ridiculous puppy, and I am inor with what difficulty soever I do't; and you shał finitely obliged to thee; ha, ha, ha! be no more jealous of me, I warrant her and you.
(Erit Moody. Moody. Well then, fare you well, and play Spark. Did you ever hear the like, Belville? with any man's honour but mine, kiss any man's Belv. O yes; how is it possible to hear such a wife but mine, and welcome-so, Mr Modes- foolish story, and see thy foolish face, and not ty, your servant.
laugh at 'em ; ha, ha, ha! (As Moody is going out, he is met by SPARKISH. Spark. So, brother-in-law, that was to have
Lucy in the closet, laughs. been, I have follow'd you from home to Bel Spark. Hey-day! what's that? What, have ville's: I have strange news for you.
you raised a devil in the closet, to make up a Moody. What, are you wiser than you were laughing chorus at me? I must take a peep, this morning?
(Going to the closet. Spark. Faith, I don't know but I am, for I Belv. Indeed but you must not. have lost your sister, and I sha'n't cat half an Spark. 'Twas a woman's voice. ounce the less at dinner for it; there's philoso Belo. So much the better for me. phy for you.
Spark. Pr’ythee, introduce me. Moody. Insensibility you mean—I hope you Belr. Though you take a pleasure in exposing don't mean to use my sister ill, sir.
your ladies, I choose to conceal mine. So my Spark. No, sir, she has used me ill; she's in dear Sparkish, lest the lady should be sick by too her tantrums—I have had a narrow escape, sir. long a confinement, and laughing heartily at you
Moody. If thou art endow'd with the smallest -I must entreat you to withdraw-Pr’ythee, exportion of understanding, explain this riddle. cuse me, I must laugh—ha, ha, ha!
Belo. Ay, ay, pr’ythee, Sparkish, condescend to Spark. Do you know that I begin to be angry, be intelligible.
Belville? Spurk. Why, you must know, we had settled Belv. I cann't help that; ha, ha, ha! to be married -it is the same thing to me, Spark. My character's at stake-I shall be whether I am married or not— I have no par- thought a damn’d silly fellow I will call Alithea ticular fancy one way or another, and so I told to an account directly.
[Exit. your sister; off or on, 'tis the same thing to me; Belo. Ha, ha, ha! but the thing was fix'd, you know-You and my aunt brought it about I had no hand in
Lucy peeping out. it. And to shew you that I was as willing to Lucy. Ha, ha, ha! 0, dear sir, let me have my marry your sister as any other woman, I suf laugh out, or I shall burst--what an advenfered the law to tie me up to hard terms, and ture !
(Langhs. the church would have finish'd me still to hard Belo. My sweet Peggy has sent me the kindest er--but she was taken with her tantrums! letter -and by the dragon himself-There's Moody. Damn your tantrums -come to the
a spirit for you! point.
Lucy. There's simplicity for you! shew me a Spurk. Your sister took an aversion to the par- town-bred girl with half the genius–Send you son, Frank Harcourt's brother--abused him like love-letter, and by a jealous guardian too! ha, a pick-pocket, and swore 'twas Harcourt himself. ha, ha!—'Tis too much-too much-Ha, ha, Moody. And so it was, for I saw him.
ha!-- -Well, Mr Belville—the world goes as Spark. Why, you are as mad as your sister- it should domy mistress will exchange her I tell you it was Ned, Frank's twin-brother. fool for a wit, Miss Peggy her brute for a pretty Moody. What, Frank told you so?
young fellow : I shall dance at two weddingsSpark. Ay, and Ned too--they were both in a Þe well rewarded by both parties-get a husband story.
myself, and be as happy as the best of you and Moody. What an incorrigible fellow ! so your humble servant.
(Exit. Come, come, I must be gone. Belo. Success attend you, Lucy.
nish you with this, as you deserve. (Lays his hand SCENE I.-Moody's House. PEGGY alone, on his sword.] Write what was to follow-let's leaning on her elbow. A table, pen, ink, and
sec-( You must muke huste and help me auuy paper.
before to-morrow, or else I shall be for ever out Peg. WELL, 'tis e'en so; I have got the Lon- of your reach, for I can defer no longer our)don disease they call love. I am sick of my
what follows our guardian, and dying for Mr Belville ! I have
[PEGGY takes the pen and writes. heard this distemper call'd a fever, but methinks
Peg. Must all out then, Bud ?-Look you it is like an ague; for when I think of my guar
there then. dian, I tremble, and am in a cold sweat; but
Moody. Let's see -(for I can defer no longe when I think of my gallant, dear Mr Belville,
er our wedding-Your slighted Ali hea.) What's my hot fit comes, and I am all in a fever in the meaning of this ? my sister's name to't! speak, deed: my own chamber is tedious to me, and I
unriddle. would fain be removed to his, and then methinks
Peg. Yes, indeed, Bud. I should be very well. Ah! poor Mr Belville!
Moody. But why her name to't? speak Well, I cannot, will not stay here; therefore l'ii speak, I say. make an end of my letter to him, which shall be
Peg. Ay, but you'll tell her again: if you a finer letter than my last, because I have studi
would not tell her agained it like any thing. Oh! sick, sick !
Moody. I will not ; I am stunn'd, my head
turns round. Speak. Enter Moody, who, seeing her writing, steals Peg. Won't you tell her, indeed and indeed ?
softly behind her, and looking over her shoul. Moody. No; speak, I say. der, snatches the paper from her.
Peg. She'll be angry with me; but I had raMoody. What, writing more letters ?
ther she should be angry with me than you, Bud. Peg. Ö, Lord! Bud, why d’ye fright me so?
And to tell you the truth, 'twas she made me (She offers to run out, he stops her and reads.
write the letter, and taught me what I should Moody. How's this ! nay, you shall not stir,
write. madam. Dear, dear, dear Mr Belville.- Very
Moody. Ha!-I thought the style was somewell, I have taught you to write letters to good what better than her own. [ Asiite.] Could she purpose-but let's see't.-(Reads.]— First, I am
come to you to teach you, since I had locked you
alone? to beg your purdon for my boldness in writing to you, which I'd have you to know I would not
Peg. Oh, thro' the key-hole, Bud. have done, had you not said first you loved me so
Moody. But why should she make you write a extremely; which, if you do, you will never suffer
letter for her to him, since she can write her. mne to be another man's, who I loathe, nauseati,
-for I was and detest—(now you can write these filthy words.) But what follows?-therefore, I hope you wilt unwilling to do it.
-because speedily find some way to free me from this unfor.
Mloody. Because, what tunate match, which wus never, I assure yout, of
Peg. Because, lest Mr Belville, as he was so my choice, but I'm afraid 'tis already too far young, should be inconstant, and refuse her, or gone; however, if you love me, as I do you, you
be vain afterwards, and shew the letter, she will try what you can do ; you must help me
might disown it, the hand not being hers.
Moody. Belville again! -Am I to be des quay before to-morrow, or else, alas ! I shall be for ever out of your reach, for I can defer no
ceived again with that young hypocrite? longer our-our-(what is to follow our-speak, have indeed
Peg. You have deceived yourself, Bud, you what) our journey into the country, I suppose.
-I have kept the secret for my Oh, woman, damn'd woman! and love, damn'd
sister's sake, as long as I couldlove, their old tempter ; for this is one of his mi
must know it and shall know it too. racles: in a moment, he can make those blind
(Cries. that could see, and those see that were blind;
Moody. Dry your eyes, those dumb that could speak, and those prattle
Peg. You always thought he was hankering afthat were dumb before. - But make an end of
ter me-Good lau! he's dying for Alithea, and your letter, and then I'll make an end of you
Alithea for him—they have had private meetings thus, and all my plagues together.
-and he was making love to her before yes
[Draws his sword. terday, from the tavern window, when you thought Peg. O Lord ! O Lord ! you are such a pas
it was me I would have discovered all but sionate man, Bud !
she made me swear to deceive you, and so I have Moody. Come, take the pen, and make an end finely-have not I, Bud? of the letter, just as you intended; if you are
Moody. Why did you write this foolish letter false in a tittle, I shall soon perceive it, and pu
to him then, and make me more foolish to carry if?
Peg. To carry on the joke, Bud-to oblige | a’n't swelled out of her head, she is in such a them.
piteous taking Moody. And will nothing serve her but that Moody. Belville sha'n't use her ill, I'll take great baby?--he's too young for her to marry; care of that—if he has made her a promise,
Peg. Why do you marry me then? 'tis the he shall keep to it--but she had better go first same thing, Bud.
-I will follow her at a distance, that she may Moody. No, no, 'tis quite different-How in- have no interruption: and I will wait in the nocent she is—This changeling could not invent Park before I see them, that they may come to a this lie; but, if she could, why should she? She reconciliation before I come upon 'em. might think I should soon discover it. (Aside.] Peg. Lau, Bud, how wise you are! I wish I --But hark you, madam, your sister went out in had half your wisdom ; you see every thing at the morning, and I have not seen her within since.
-Stand a one side then, and I'll tell Peg. Alack-a-day! she has been crying all her you are gone to your room, and when she day above, it seems, in a corner.
passes by, you may follow her. Moody. Where is she? let me speak with her. Moody. And so I will she sha'n't see me till
Peg. O Lord! then he'll discover all.-(Aside.] | I break in upon her at Belville's. Pray hold, Bud; what, d’ye mean to discover Peg. Now for it.
[Exit PEGGY. me! she'll know I have told you then. Pray, Moody. My case is something better-for supBud, let me talk with her first.
pose the worst-should Belville use her ill-I Moody. I must speak with her, to know whe- had rather fight him for not marrying my sister, ther Belville ever made her any promise, and than for debauching my wife, for I will make her whether she will be married to Sparkish or no. mine absolutely to-morrow; and of the two I
Peg. Pray, dear Bud, don't, till I have spoken had rather find my sister too forward than my with her, and told her that I have told you all; wife: I expected no other from her free educafor she'll kill me else.
tion, as she calls it, and her passion for the town. Moody. Go then and bid her come to me. Well, wife and sister are names which make us Peg. Yes, yes, Bud.
expect love and duty, pleasure and comfort; but Moody. Let me see
we find 'em plagues and torments, and are equalPeg. I have just got time to know of Lucy, ly, tho' differently, troublesome to their keeper. who first set me to work, what lie I shall tell But here she comes.
(Steps on one side. next; for I am e'en at my wit's end.
[ Aside, and exit.
Enter PEGGY, dress'd like ALITHEA; and as Moody. Well, I resolve it, Belville shall have she passes over the stage, seems to sigh, sob, her: I'd rather give him my sister, than lend
and wipe her eyes. him my wife; and such an alliance will prevent Peg. Heigho!
(Erit. his pretensions to my wife, sure—I'll make him Moody. (Comes forward.] There the poor deof kin to her, and then he won't care for her.
vil goes, sighing and sobbing; a woful example Peg. (Re-enters] O Lord, Bud, I told you what of the fatal consequences of a town education anger you would make me with my sister.
—but I am bound in duty, as well as inclinaMoody. Won't she come hither?
tion, to do my utmost to save her—but first I'll Peg. No, no, she's asham'd to look you in the secure my own property. [Opens the door and face; she'll go directly to Mr Belville, she says calls.1-Peggy! Peggy !--my dear!-I will re
-She must speak with him, before she disco turn as soon as possible—do you hear me? Why vers all to you-or even sees you. She says too, don't you answer? You may read in the book i that you shall know the reason by and by: Pray bought you 'till I come back-As the Jew says let her have her way, Bud -she won't be paci- in the play, Fast bind, fast find. [Locks the door. fied if you don't -and will never forgive me This is the best, and only security for female af-For my part, Bud, I believe, but don't tell fections.
Erit. any body, they have broken a piece of silver between them, or have contracted one another, as SCENE II.— The Purk before BELVILLE's Door. we have done, you know, which is the next thing to being married.
Enter SPARKISH, fuddled. Moody. Pooh! you fool -she ashamed of Spurk. If I can but meet with her, or any body talking with me about Belville, because I made that belongs to her, they will find me a match the match for her with Sparkish! but Sparkish for 'em -When a man has wit, and a great is a fool, and I have no objection to Belville's deal of it-Champagne gives it a double edge
; family or fortune
and nothing can withstand it'tis a lighted Peg. I will, Bud.
[Going. natch to gunpowder--the mine is sprung, and Movdy. Stay, stay, Peggy let her have the poor devils are toss'd heels uppermost in an her own way—she shall go to Belville herself, and instant. I was right to consult my friends, and I'll follow her that will be best — let her they all agree with Moody, that I make a damu’d have her whim.
ridiculous figure, as matters stand at present. Peg. You're in the right, Bud--for they I'll consult Belville—this is his house--he's my have certainly had a quarrel, by her crying and friend too—and no fool. It shall be so-damn hanging her head so—İ!!! be hang'd if her eyes it, I must not be ridiculous. (Going to the door,
-tell her so.
sees PEGGY coming.] Hold! hold ! if the Cham man of so little taste is not worth fighting for pagne does not hurt my eye-sight, while it shar- she's not worth my sword ! but if you'll fight me pens my wit, the enemy is marching up this way to-morrow morning for diversion, I am your -Come on, Madam Alithea ; now for a smart man. fire, and then let's see who will be ridiculous. Moody. Relinquish your title in the lady to
Belville peaceably, and you may sleep in a whole Enter PEGGY.
skin. Peg. Dear me, I begin to tremble—there is Spark. Belville ! he would not have your sisMr Sparkish, and I cann't get to Mr Belville's ter with the fortune of a nabob; no, no, his house without passing by him-he sees me—and mouth waters at your country tid-bit at home will discover me he seems in liquor too!-bless much good may it do him. me !
Moody. And you think so, puppy-ha, ha, ha! Spark. O ho! she stands at bay a little-she Spark. Yes, I do, mastiffha, ha, ha! don't much relish the engagement. The first Moodly. Then thy folly is complete_ha, ha, ha! blow is half the battle. I'll be a little figurative Spurk. Thine will be so, when thou hast marwith her. (Approaching her.) I find, madam, ried thy country innocence—ha, ha, ha! you like a solo better than a duet. You need
[They laugh at each other. not have been walking alone this evening, if you had been wiser yesterday—What, nothing to
Enter HARCOURT. say
for yourself? Repentance, I suppose, makes Moodly. Who have we here? you as awkward and as foolish as the poor coun Spark. What, my boy Harcourt ! try girl your brother has lock'd up in Pall Mall. Moody. What brings you here, sir? Peg. I'm frighten’d out of my wits.
Hur. I follow'd you to Belville's, to present a
(Tries to pass him. near relation of yours, and a nearer one of mine, Spark. Not a step farther shall you go, 'till
(Exit. you give me an account of your behaviour, and Spurk. What's the matter now? make me reparation for being ridiculous. What, dumb still-then, if you won't by fair means, I
Re-enter HARCOURT with ALITHEA. must squeeze you to a confession. (As he goes Har. Give me leave, gentlemen, without of. to seize her, she slips by him ; but he catches hold fence to either, to present Mrs Harcourt to you. of her before she reaches BELVILLE's door.] Not Spark. Alithea ! your wife! -Mr Moody, quite so fast, if you please. Come, come, let are you in the clouds too? me see your modest face, and hear your soft Moody. If I am not in a dream-I am the tongue or I shall be tempted to use you ill. most miserable waking dog, that ever run mad
with his misfortunes and astonishment ! Enter MOODY.
Har. Why so, Jack ?
-can you object to my Movdy. Hands off, you ruffian-how dare you happiness, when this gentleman was unworthy use a lady, and my sister, in this manner? of it?
(Moody walks about in a rage. [Moody takes her from SPARKISH. Spark. This is very fine, very fine indeed Spark. She's my property, sir-transferred to where's your story about Belville now, Squire me by you—and though I would give her up to Moody? Pr’ythee don't chafe, and stare, and any body for a dirty sword-knot, yet I won't be stride, and beat thy head, like a mad tragedy poet bullied out of my right, tho' it is not worth that -but out with thy tropes and figures.
(Snaps his fingers. Moody. Zounds! I cann't bear it. Moody. There's a fellow to be a husband (Goes hastily to Belville's door, and knocks hard. you are justified in despising him, and flying from Ali. Dear brother, what's the matter? him-I'll defend you with my purse and my Moody. The devil's the matter ! the devil and sword knock at the door, and let me speak woman together. (Knocks again.) I'll brcak the to Belville.-(PEGGY knocks al the door ; ühen door down if they won't answer. [Knocks again. the footman opens it, she runs in.)- Is your master at home, friend?
Footman appears in the balcony. Fool. Yes, sir.
Foot. What would your honour please to Moody. Tell him then that I have rescued that have ? lady from this gentleman, and that by her desire, Moody. Your master, rascal ! and my consent, she flies to him for protection; Fout. He is obeying your commands, sir, and if he can get a parson, let him marry her this the moment he is finished he will do himself the minute; tell him so, and shut the door. (Exit pleasure to wait upon you. Footman.)-And now, sir, if your wine has given Moody. You sneering villain you—If your you courage, you had better shew it upon this master does not produce that she devil, who is occasion, for you are still damn’d ridiculous. now with him, and who, with a face of inno
Spark. Did you ever hear the like! cence, has cheated and undone inc, I'll set fire Look ye, Mr Moody, we are in the Park, and to his house,
(Exil Foot. to draw a sword is an offence to the court-50 Spark. Gad so! now I begin to smoke the you may vapour as long as you please. A wo business. Well said, simplicity, rural simplicity!