replied the other: "fhe is wafhing your twa fhirts "at the next door, because"-" Fire and fury, "no more of thy ftupid explanations," cried he: Go and inform her we have got company. Were "that Scotch hag," continued he, turning to me, to be for ever in my family, fhe would never "learn politenefs, nor forget that abfurd poifonous accent of her's, or teftify the smallest speci"men of breeding or high life; and yet it is very "furprising too, as I had her from a parliament

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man, a friend of mine, from the Highlands; one "of the politeft men in the world; but that's a "fecret."

We waited fome time for Mrs. Tibbs's arrival, during which interval I had a full opportunity of furyeying the chamber and all its furniture, which confifted of four chairs with old wrought bottoms, that he affured me were his wife's embroidery; a square table that had been once japanned, a cradle in one corner, a lumber cabinet in the other; a broken fhepherdefs, and a mandarine without an head, were stuck over the chimney; and round the walls feveral paltry unframed pictures, which he obferved were all of his own drawing. "What do

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you think, Sir, of that head in the corner, done "in the manner of Grifoni? There's the true "keeping in it; it is my own face; and, though "there happens to be no likeness, a countess of "fered me a hundred for its fellow: I refufed: "her, for, hang it, that would be mechanical, "you know."

The wife, at laft, made her appearance, at once, a flattern

D 3

a flattern and a

coquette; much emaciat carrying the remains of beauty. She m apologies for being feen in fuch an odious but hoped to be excufed, as he had fta Light at Vauxhall Gardens with the Cou was exceffively fond of the horns. "A

my dear," added she, turning to he "his Lordship drank your health in a Poor Jack," cries he, "a dear good-nat ture, I know he loves me. But I hope, you have given orders for dinner: your no great preparations neither; there are of us; fomething elegant, and little w a turbot, an ortolan, or a-" "Or wha "think, my dear," interrupts the wife," pretty bit of ox-cheek, piping hot, an with a little of my own fauce? "thing," replied he; "it will eat beft w fmart bottled beer; but be fure to let the fauce his Grace was fo fond of. I h immenfe loads of meet; that is country a extreme difgufting to those who are in acquainted with high life."

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By this time my curiofity began to abate, appetite to incrcafe. The company of fools firit make us fimile, but at last never fails of re us melancholy. I therefore pretended to r a prior engagement, and, after having fho respect to the house, by giving the old fe piece of money at the door, I took my leave Tibbs affuring me, that dinner, if I staid, be ready at least in less than two hours.

1

Attend to one Profeffion. Conjuror and Taylor, a Story. Fable of the Goofe. The Pond and Mastiff. Steryof a Painter who pleafed every Body and Nobody.

As it hath been obferved, that few are better

qualified to give others advice, than those who have taken the least of it themselves; fo, in this refpect, I find myself perfectly authorized to offer mine; and must take leave to throw together a few obfervations upon that part of a young man's conduct on his entering into life, as it is called.

The moft ufual way among young men who' have no refolution of their own, is first to ask one friend's advice, and follow it for fome time; then to ask advice of another, and turn to that; fo of a third, ftill unfteady, always changing. However,. every change of this nature is for the worse: people may tell' you of your being unfit for fome peculiar occupations in life: but heed them not: whatever employment you follow with perfeverance and affiduity, will be found fit for you; it will be your fupport in youth, and comfort in age. In learning the useful part of every profeffion, very moderate abilities will fuffice: great abilities are generally obnoxious to the poffeffors. Life has been compared to a race; but the allufion ftill ‹ improves, by observing, that the most swift are ever the most apt to ftray from the course.

To know one profeffion only, is enough for one man to know; and this, whatever the profeffors may tell you to the contrary, is foon learned. Be contented, therefore with one good employment; :

for if you understand two at a time, people will give you bufinefs in neither.

A conjurer and a taylor once happened to converfe together. "Alas!" cries the taylor, "what an unhappy poor creature am I! If people ever "take it into their heads to live without clothes, "I am undone; I have no other trade to have re"courfe to." "Indeed, friend, I pity you fin"cerely," replies the conjurer; but, thank "heaven, things are not quite fo bad with me: "for if one trick fhould fail, I have an hundred "tricks more for them yet. However, if at any

time you are reduced to beggary,, apply to me, "and I will relieve you." A famine overfpread the land: the taylor made a fhift to live, because his customers could not be without clothes; but the poor conjure, with all his hundred tricks, could find none that had money to throw away. It was in vain that he promised to eat fire, or to vomit pins; no fingle creature would relieve him: till he was at laft obliged to beg from the very taylor whofe calling he had formerly defpifed.

There are no obftructions more fatal to fortune, than pride and refentment. If you must resent injuries at all, at least fupprefs your indignation till you become rich, and then flow away. The refentment of a poor man is like the efforts of a harmless infect to fting; it may get him crushed, but cannot defend him. Who values that anger which is confumed only in empty menaces?

Once upon a time, a goose fed its young by a pond-fide; and a goofe, in fuch circumftances, is always extremely proud, and'exceffively punctilious.

If

If any other animal, without the leaft defign to offend, happened to pafs that way, the goofe was immediately at it. The pond, fhe faid, was hers, and fhe would maintain her right in it, and support her honour, while she had a bill to hiss, or a wing to. flutter. In this manner fhe drove away ducks, pigs, and chickens; nay, even the infidious cat was feen to fcamper. A lounging mastiff, however, happened" to pass by, and thought it no harm if he should lap. a little of the water, as he was thirsty. The guardian goofe flew at him like a fury, pecked at him with her beak, and flapped him with her feathers. The dog grew angry, and had twenty times a mind to give her a fly fnap; but, fuppreffing his indignation, because his mafter was nigh, "A pox "thee," cries he, "for a fool; fure those who have "neither strength nor weapons to fight, at least "fhould be civil." So faying, he went forward to the pond, quenched his thirst in spite of the goose, and followed his mafter..

take

Another obftruction to the fortune of youth, is, that, while they are willing to take offence from none, they are alfo equally defirous of giving nobody offence. From hence they endeavour to please all, comply with every request, and attempt to fuit them-felves to every company; have no will of their own; but, like wax, catch every contiguous impreffion. By thus attempting to give univerfal fatisfaction, they at last find themselves miferably dif-, appointed: to bring the generality of admirers on our fide, it is fufficient to attempt pleafing a very few.

A painter of eminence was once refolved to. finish a piece which should please the whole world.. D 5 When?