The Humans: A NovelThe bestselling, award-winning author of The Midnight Library offers his funniest, most devastating dark comedy yet, a “silly, sad, suspenseful, and soulful” (Philadelphia Inquirer) novel that’s “full of heart” (Entertainment Weekly). When an extra-terrestrial visitor arrives on Earth, his first impressions of the human species are less than positive. Taking the form of Professor Andrew Martin, a prominent mathematician at Cambridge University, the visitor is eager to complete the gruesome task assigned him and hurry home to his own utopian planet, where everyone is omniscient and immortal. He is disgusted by the way humans look, what they eat, their capacity for murder and war, and is equally baffled by the concepts of love and family. But as time goes on, he starts to realize there may be more to this strange species than he had thought. Disguised as Martin, he drinks wine, reads poetry, develops an ear for rock music, and a taste for peanut butter. Slowly, unexpectedly, he forges bonds with Martin’s family. He begins to see hope and beauty in the humans’ imperfection, and begins to question the very mission that brought him there. Praised by The New York Times as a “novelist of great seriousness and talent,” author Matt Haig delivers an unlikely story about human nature and the joy found in the messiness of life on Earth. The Humans is a funny, compulsively readable tale that playfully and movingly explores the ultimate subject—ourselves. |
Contents
1 | |
8 | |
18 | |
Human Clothes | 25 |
Mad People | 32 |
The World as Will and Representation | 39 |
Campion Row | 47 |
A Stranger | 54 |
Where We Are From | 95 |
Grigori Perelman | 104 |
Isobels Dance | 110 |
I Held aJewel in My Fingers | 121 |
The Rhythm of Life | 187 |
Australian Wine | 193 |
The Intruder | 203 |
The Art of Letting Go | 210 |
Primes | 61 |
Glory | 68 |
Emily Dickinson | 77 |
Dishwasher | 81 |
Daniel Russell | 88 |
Platykurtic Distribution | 217 |
Places Beyond Logic | 225 |
Acknowledgments | 281 |
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Common terms and phrases
actually alien Andrew Andrew Martin Anyway asked beautiful become believe body called close clothes confused course Daniel dark dead didn’t door Earth everything eyes face fact feel felt fucking give going Gulliver hair hand happened head hear heard human idea important inside Isobel It’s kill kind knew laughed leave light Listen living looked mathematics matter mean meant mind mother mouth never Newton night numbers opened pain person planet possible prime Professor question rain realized remember road seemed seen sense side smiled someone sound species stand started stayed stood stop strange talking tell things thought told tried trying turned understand universe voice waited walked wasn’t watched wearing wondered worry