Or for love's sake, a word that loves all men ; King. Saint Cupid, then! and, soldiers, to the Biron. Advance your standards, and upon them, Pell-mell, down with them! but be first advis'd, Long. Now to plain-dealing; lay these glozes by: Biron. First, from the park let us conduct them Then, homeward every man attach the hand We will with some strange pastime solace them, no corn; And justice always whirls in equal measure: Light wenches may prove plagues to men forsworn; If so, our copper buys no better treasure. ACT V. [Exeunt. SCENE I-Another part of the same. Hol. Satis quod sufficit. Enter Nath. I praise God for you, sir: your reasons' Hol. Bone?-bone, for benè: Priscian a little scratch'd; 'twill serve. Enter Armado, Moth, and Costard. Nath. Videsne quis venit ? [To Moth. Hol. Quare Chirra, not sirrah? Cost. O, they have lived long in the alms-basket Moth. Peace; the peal begins. Arm. Monsieur, [To Hol.] are you not letter'd? Moth, Yes, yes; he teaches boys the hornbook:What is a, b, spelt backward, with a horn on his head? Hol. Ba, pueritia, with a horn added. Moth. Ba, most silly sheep, with a horn:-You hear his learning. Hol. Quis, quis, thou consonant? Moth. The third of the five vowels, if you re peat them; or the fifth, if I. Hol. I will repeat them, a, e, i.— Moth. The sheep: the other two concludes it; o, u. Arm. Now, by the salt wave of the Mediterra neum, a sweet touch, a quick venew of wit: snip, snap, quick and home; it rejoiceth my intellect: true wit Moth. Offer'd by a child to an old man; which is wit-old. Hol. What is the figure? what is the figure? Hol. Thou disputest like an infant: go, whip thy gig. Moth. Lend me your horn to make one, and I will whip about your infamy circùm circà; A gig at dinner have been sharp and sententious; plea-of a cuckold's horn! sant without scurrility, witty without affection, Cost. An I had but one penny in the world, audacious without impudency, learned without thou should'st have it to buy gingerbread: hold, opinion, and strange without heresy. I did con- there is the very remuneration I had of thy master, verse this quondam day with a companion of the thou half-penny purse of wit, thou pigeon-egg of king's, who is intituled, nominated, or called, Don discretion. O, an the heavens were so pleased, that Adriano de Armado. thou wert but my bastard! what a joyful father Arm. Arts-man, præambula; we will be singed Arm. At your sweet pleasure, for the mountain, Hol. Novi hominem tanquam te: His humour is lofty, his discourse peremptory, his tongue filed, his eye ambitious, his gait majestical, and his general behaviour vain, ridiculous, and thrasonical, He is too picked,4 too spruce, too affected, too odd,| as it were, too perigrinate, as I may call it. Nath. A most singular and choice epithet, [Takes out his table-book. Hol. He draweth out the thread of his verbosity finer than the staple of his argument. I abhor such fanatical phantasms, such insociable and point-devise' companions; such rackers of orthography, as to speak, dout, fine, when he should say doubt; det, when he should pronounce debt; d, e, b, t; not d, e, t: he clepeth a calf, cauf; half, hauf; Hol. The posterior of the day, most generous neighbour, vocatur, nebour; neigh, abbreviated, sir, is liable, congruent, and measurable for the This is abhominable (which he would call afternoon: the word is well cull'd, chose; sweet abominable,) it insinuateth me of insanie; Ne and apt, I do assure you, sir, I do assure. intelligis domine? to make frantic, lunatic. ne: Nath. Laus deo, bone intelligo. Arm. Sir, it is the king's most sweet pleasure and affection, to congratulate the princess at her pavilion, in the posteriors of this day; which the rude multitude call the afternoon. Arm. Sir, the king is a noble gentleman; and my familiar, I do assure you, very good friend : (6) A small inflammable substance, swallowed in a glass of wine, (7) A hit, (8) Free-school, For what is inward1 between us, let it pass:-I do Prin. Nothing but this? yes, as much love in beseech thee, remember thy courtesy-I beseech rhyme Ros. That was the way to make his god-head wax; For he hath been five thousand years a boy. thee, apparel thy head; and among other importu- As would be cramm'd up in a sheet of paper, nate and most serious designs,-and of great im- Writ on both sides the leaf, margent and all;" port, indeed, too;-but let that pass:-for I must That he was fain to seal on Cupid's name. tell thee, it will please his grace (by the world) sometime to lean upon my poor shoulder; and with his royal finger, thus, dally with my excrement, with my mustachio: but sweet heart, let that pass. By the world, I recount no fable; some certain special honours it pleaseth his greatness to impart to Armado, a soldier, a man of travel, that hath Kath. He made her melancholy, sad, and heavy; seen the world: but let that pass.-The very all of And so she died: had she been light, like you, all is,-but, sweet heart, I do implore secrecy,-Of such a merry, nimble, stirring spirit, that the king would have me present the princess, She might have been a grandam ere she died: sweet chuck,' with some delightful ostentation, or And so may you; for a light heart lives long. show, or pageant, or antic, or fire-work. Now, Ros. What's your dark meaning, mouse," of this understanding that the curate and your sweet self, are good at such eruptions, and sudden breaking out of mirth, as it were, I have acquainted you withal, to the end to crave your assistance. light word? Kath. A light condition in a beauty dark. out. Hol. Sir, you shall present before her the nine worthies. Sir Nathaniel, as concerning some en-Therefore, I'll darkly end the argument. tertainment of time, some show in the posterior of this day, to be rendered by our assistance,-the king's command, and this most gallant, illustrate, and learned gentleman,-before the princess; I say, none so fit as to present the nine worthies. Nath. Where will you find men worthy enough to present them? Kath. You'll mar the light, by taking it in snuff;' Ros. Look, what you do, you do it still i' the dark. Hol. Joshua, yourself; myself, or this gallant gentleman, Judas Maccabæus; this swain, because of his great limb or joint, shall pass Pompey the great; the page, Hercules. Arm. Pardon, sir, error: he is not quantity enough for that worthy's thumb: he is not so big as the end of his club. Hol. Shall I have audience? he shall present Hercules in minority; his enter and exit shall be strangling a snake; and I will have an apology for that purpose. Moth. An excellent device! so, if any of the audience hiss, you may cry well done, Hercules! now thou crusheth the snake! that is the way to make an offence gracious; though few have the grace to do it. Arm. For the rest of the worthies ? Hol. We attend. Arm. We will have, if this fadge not, an antic. I beseech you, follow. Hol. Via, good man Dull! thou has spoken no word all this while. Dull. Nor understood none neither, sir. Dull. I'll make one in a dance, or so; or I will play on the tabor to the worthies, and let them dance the hay. Hol. Most dull, honest Dull, to our sport, away. [Exeunt. SCENE II-Another part of the same. Before the Princess's Pavilion. Enter the Princess, Katharine, Rosaline, and Maria. Ros. Great reason; for, Past cure is still past care. Ros. I would, you knew. I Ros. Much, in the letters; nothing in the praise. My red dominical, my golden letter: O, that your face were not so full of O's! Kath. A pox of that jest! and beshrew all shrows! Prin. But what was sent to you from fair Dumain? Kath. Madam, this glove. Prin. Mar. This, and these pearls, to me sent Longe The letter is too long by half a mile. Prin. I think no less: Dost thou not wish in The chain were longer, and the letter short? part, Prin. We are wise girls, to mock our lovers so. Prin. Sweet hearts, we shall be rich ere we depart, That same Birón I'll torture ere I go. If fairings come thus plentifully in: A lady walled about with diamonds!- Confidential. (2) Beard. O, that I knew he were but in by the week! (7) Formerly a term of endearment, (8) In anger, Prin. Here comes Boyet, and mirth is in his face. Boyet. O, I am stabb'd with laughter! Where's her grace? Prin. Thy news, Boyet? That charge their breath against us? say, scout, say. Making the bold wag by their praises bolder. Cry'd, Via! we will do't, come what will come : Prin. But what, but what, come they to visit us? Unto his several mistress; which they'll know Prin. And will they so? the gallants shall be task'd: For, ladies, we will every one be mask'd; Hold, Rosaline, this favour thou shalt wear; Ros. But shall we dance, if they desire us to't! Prin. No; to the death, we will not move a foot: Nor to their penn'd speech render we no grace; But, while 'tis spoke, each turn away her face. Boyet. Why, that contempt will kill the speaker's heart, And quite divorce his memory from his part. Prin. Therefore I do it; and, I make no doubt, The rest will ne'er come in, if he be out. There's no such sport, as sport by sport o'erthrown; To make theirs ours, and ours none but our own: So shall we stay, mocking intended game; And they, well mock'd, depart away with shame. [Trumpets sound within. Boyet. The trumpet sounds; be mask'd, the maskers come. The ladies mask. Enter the King, Biron, Longaville, and Dumain, in Russian habits, and masked; Moth, musicians, and attendants. Moth. All hail! the richest beauties on the earth! The ladies turn their backs to him. That ever turn'd their-backs-to mortal views! Boyet. True; out, indeed. Moth. Out of your favours, heavenly spirits, vouchsafe Not to behold Biron. Once to behold, rogue. Moth. Once to behold with your sun-beamed eyes,with your sun-beamed eyes Boyet. They will not answer to that epithet; You were best call it, daughter-beamed eyes. Moth. They do not mark me, and that brings me out. Biron. Is this your perfectness? be gone, you rogue. Ros. What would these strangers? know their minds, Boyet: If they do speak our language, 'tis our will Boyet. What would you with the princess? Boyet. Nothing but peace, and gentle visitation. Ros. Why, that they have; and bid them so be gone. Boyet. She says, you have it, and you may be gone. To tread a measure with you on this grass. Is in one mile: if they have measur'd many, Boyet. If, to come hither you have measur'd miles, Biron. Tell her, we measure them by weary steps. How many weary steps, Biron. We number nothing that we spend for you, Our duty is so rich, so infinite, That we may do it still without accompt. Ros. My face is but a moon, and clouded too. King. Blessed are clouds, to do as such clouds do! Vouchsafe, bright moon, and these thy stars, to shine (Those clouds remov'd,) upon our wat'ry eyne. Ros. O vain petitioner! beg a greater matter; Thou now request'st but moonshine in the water. King. Then, in our measure do but vouchsafe one change: soon. Thou bid'st me beg; this begging is not strange. Ros. Play, music, then: nay, you must do it [Music plays. Not yet;-no dance:-thus change I like the moon. King. Will you not dance? How come you thus estrang'd? Ros. You took the moon at full; but now she's chang'd. King. Yet still she is the moon, and I the man. The music plays; vouchsafe some motion to it. Ros. Our ears vouchsafe it. King. But your legs should do it. Ros. Since you are strangers, and come here by chance, : We'll not be nice: take hands;-we will not dance. Ros. Your absence only. King. That can never be. Ros. Then cannot we be bought: and so adieu; Twice to your visor, and half once to you! King. If you deny to dance, let's hold more chat. Ros. In private then. King. I am best pleas'd with that. [They converse apart. Biron. White-handed mistress, one sweet word with thee. Prin. Honey, and milk, and sugar; there is three. Biron. Nay then, two treys (an if you grow so nice,) Metheglin, wort, and malmsey ;-Well run, dice! There's half a dozen sweets. Prin. Seventh sweet, adieu! Since you can cog, I'll play no more with you. Biron. One word in secret. Prin. Let it not be sweet. Biron. Thou griev'st my gall. Prin. Biron. Gall? bitter. Therefore meet. [They converse apart. Dum. Will you vouchsafe with me to change a word? Say you so? Fair lord,Please it you, Take that for your fair lady. As much in private, and I'll bid adieu. [They converse apart. Kath. What, was your visor made without a tongue? Long. I know the reason, lady, why you ask. And would afford my speechless visor half. No, a fair lord calf. No, I'll not be your half: Will you give horns, chaste lady? do not so. cry. Boyet. The tongues of mocking wenches are as keen As is the razor's edge invisible, Cutting a smaller hair than may be seen; Above the sense of sense: so sensible Seemeth their conference; their conceits have wings, Fleeter than arrows, bullets, wind, thought, swifter things. Ros. Not one word more, my maids; break off, break off. Biron. By heaven, all dry-beaten with pure scoff! King. Farewell, mad wenches; you have simple wits. [Exeunt King, Lords, Moth, music, and attendants. Prin. Twenty adieus, my frozen Muscovites.Are these the breed of wits so wonder'd at? Boyet. Tapers they are, with your sweet breaths puff'd out. Ros. Well-liking wits they have; gross, gross fat, fat. Prin. O poverty in wit, kingly-poor flout! Will they not, think you, hang themselves to-night? Or ever, but in visors, show their faces? This pert Birón was out of countenance quite. Ros. O they were all in lamentable cases! The king was weeping-ripe for a good word. Prin. Birón did swear himself out of all suit. Mar. Dumain was at my service, and his sword: No point, quochI: my servant straight was mute. Kath. Lord Longaville said, I came o'er his heart; And trow you, what he call'd me? Prin. Kath. Yes, in good faith. Prin. Qualm, perhaps. Go, sickness as thou art! Ros. Well, better wits have worn plain statutecaps. But will you hear? the king is my love sworn. Prin. And quick Birón hath plighted faith to me. Kath. And Longaville was for my service born. Mur. Dumain is mine, as sure as bark on tree. Boyet. Madam, and pretty mistresses, give ear: Immediately they will again be here (3) Better wits may be found among citizens. In their own shapes; for it can never be, Boyet. They will, they will, God knows; And leap for joy, though they are lame with blows: Therefore, change favours; and when they repair, Blow like sweet roses in the summer air. Prin. How blow? how blow? speak to be understood. Boyet. Fair ladies, mask'd, are roses in their bud: Dismask'd, their damask sweet commixture shown, Are angels veiling clouds, or roses blown. Prin. Avaunt, perplexity! What shall we do, If they return in their own shapes to woo? Ros. Good madam, if by me you'll be advis'd, Let's mock them still, as well known, as disguis'd: Let us complain to them what fools were here, Disguis'd like Muscovites, in shapeless? gear; And wonder what they were; and to what end Their shallow shows, and prologue vilely penn'd, And their rough carriage so ridiculous, Should be presented at our tent to us. Boyel. Ladies, withdraw; the gallants are at hand. Prin. Whip to our tents, as roes run over land. [Exeunt Princess, Ros. Kath. and Maria. Enter the King, Biron, Longaville, and Dumain, in their proper habits. King. Fair sir, God save you! Where is the princess? Boyet. Gone to her tent: Please it your majesty, Command me any service to her thither? King. That she vouchsafe me audience for one word. Boyet. I will; and so will she, I know, my lord. [Exit. Biron. This fellow pecks up wit, as pigeons peas; And utters it again when God doth please: King. blister on his sweet tongue, with my heart, That put Armado's page out of his part! Biron. See where it comes!-Behaviour, what wert thou, Till this man show'd thee? and what art thou now? King. All hail, sweet madam, and fair time of day! King. Construe my speeches better, if you may. Prin. Then wish me better, I will give you leave. King. We came to visit you; and purpose now To lead you to our court: vouchsafe it then. Prin. This field shall hold me; and so hold your VOW: Nor God, nor I, delight in perjur'd men. King. Rebuke me not for that which you provoke ; The virtue of your eye must break my oath. Prin. You nick-name virtue: vice you should have spoke; For virtue's office never breaks men's troth. Now, by my maiden honour, yet as pure As the unsullied lily, I protest, A world of torments though I should endure, I would not yield to be your house's guest; So much I hate a breaking cause to be Of heavenly oaths, vow'd with integrity. King. O, you have liv'd in desolation here, Unseen, unvisited, much to our shame. Prin. Not so, my lord; it is not so, I swear. We have had pastimes here, and pleasant game; A mess of Russians left us but of late. King. How, madam? Russians? Prin. Ay, in truth, my lord; Trim gallants, full of courtship, and of state. Ros. Madam, speak true :-It is not so, my lord; My lady (to the manner of the days,) In courtesy, gives undeserving praise. We four, indeed, confronted here with four In Russian habit: here they stay'd an hour, And talk'd apace; and in that hour, my lord, They did not bless us with one happy word. I dare not call them fools; but this I think, When they are thirsty, fools would fain have drink. Biron. This jest is dry to me-Fair, gentle sweet, Your wit makes wise things foolish; when we greet eye, Biron. I am a fool, and full of poverty. Ros. But that you take what doth to you belong, It were a fault to snatch words from my tongue. Biron. O, I am yours, and all that I possess. Ros. All the fool mine? Biron. I cannot give you less. Ros. Which of the visors was it, that you wore? Biron. Where? when? what visor? why demand you this? Ros. There, then, that visor; that superfluous case, That hid the worse, and show'd the better face. King. We are descried: they'll mock us now downright. Ros. Help, hold his brows! he'll swoon! Why look you pale? Sea-sick, I think, coming from Muscovy. Biron. Thus pour the stars down plagues for perjury. Can any face of brass hold longer out?Here stand I, lady; dart thy skill at me; Bruise me with scorn, confound me with a flout; Thrust thy sharp wit quite through my ignorance; Cut me to pieces with thy keen conceit; (5) The tooth of the horse-whale. |