Claud. Now, signior! what news? D. Pedro. Welcome, signior: You are almost come to part almost a fray. Claud. We had like to have had our two noses snapped off with two old men without teeth. D. Pedro. Leonato and his brother: What think'st thou? Had we fought, I doubt, we should have been too young for them. Bene. In a false quarrel there is no true valour. I came to seek you both. Claud. We have been up and down to seek thee; for we are high-proof melancholy, and would fain have it beaten away: Wilt thou use thy wit? Bene. It is in my scabbard; shall I draw it? D. Pedro. Dost thou wear thy wit by thy side? Claud. Never any did so, though very many have been beside their wit.-I will bid thee draw as we do the minstrels; draw, to pleasure us. D. Pedro. As I am an honest man, he looks pale: Art thou sick or angry? Claud. What! courage, man! What though care killed a cat, thou hast mettle enough in thee to kill care. Bene. Sir, I shall meet your wit in the career, an you charge it against me:-I pray you, choose another subject. Claud. Nay, then give him another staff; this last was broke cross. D. Pedro. By this light, he changes more and more: I think, he be angry indeed. Claud. If he be, he knows how to turn his girdle. Bene. You are a villain; I jest not:-I will make it good how you dare, with what you dare, and when you dare:-Do me right, or I will protest your cowardice. You have killed a sweet lady, and her death shall fall heavy on you: Let me hear from you. To give a challenge. Claud. Well, I will meet you, so I may have good cheer. D. Pedro. What, a feast? a feast? Claud. I'faith, I thank him; he hath bid me to a calf's-head and a capon; the which if I do not carve most curiously, say, my knife's naught.-Shall I not find a woodcock too? Bene. Sir, your wit ambles well; it goes easily. D. Pedro. I'll tell thee how Beatrice praised thy wit the other day: I said, thou hadst a fine wit; True, says she, a fine little one: No, said I, a great wit; Right, says she, a great gross one: Nay, said I, a good wit: Just, said she, it hurts nobody: Nay, said I, the gentleman is wise; Certain, said she, a wise gentleman: Nay, said I, he hath the tongues; That I believe, said she, for he swore a thing to me on Monday night, which he forswore on Tuesday morning; there's a double tongue; there's two tongues. Thus did she, an hour together, trans-shape thy particular virtues; yet, at last, she concluded with a sigh, thou wast the properest man in Italy. Claud. For the which she wept heartily, and said, she cared not. D. Pedro. Yea, that she did; but yet, for all that, an if she did not hate him deadly, she would love him dearly: the old man's daughter told us all. Claud. All, all; and moreover, God saw him when he was hid in the garden. D. Pedro. But when shall we set the savage bull's horns on the sensible Benedick's head? Claud. Yea, and text underneath, Here dwells Benedick the married man. mind ; Bene. Fare you well, boy; you know my I will leave you now to your gossip-like humour: you break jests as braggards do their blades, which, God be thanked, hurt not.-My lord, for your many courtesies I thank you: I must discontinue your • Invited. company; your brother, the bastard, is fled from Messina: you have, among you, killed a sweet and innocent lady: for my lord Lack-beard, there, he and I shall meet; and till then, peace be with him. [Exit Benedick. D. Pedro. He is in earnest. Claud. In most profound earnest; and, I'll warrant you, for the love of Beatrice. D. Pedro. And hath challenged thee? D. Pedro. What a pretty thing man is, when he goes in his doublet and hose, and leaves off his wit! Enter Dogberry, Verges, and the Watch, with Conrade and Borachio. Claud. He is then a giant to an ape: but then is an ape a doctor to such a man. D. Pedro. But, soft you, let be; pluck up, my heart, and be sad! Did he not say my brother was fled? Dogb. Come, you, sir; if justice cannot tame you, she shall ne'er weigh more reasons in her ba. I ance; nay, an you be a cursing hypocrite once, you must be looked to. D. Pedro. How now, two of my brother's men bound! Borachio, one! Claud. Hearken to their offence, my lord! D. Pedro. Officers, what offence have these men done? Dogb. Marry, sir, they have committed false report; moreover, they have spoken untruths; secondarily, they are slanders; sixth and lastly, they have belied a lady; thirdly, they have verified unjust things: and, to conclude, they are lying knaves. D. Pedro. First, I ask thee what they have done; thirdly, I ask thee what's their offence; sixth and * Serious. lastly, why they are committed; and, to conclude, what you lay to their charge. Claud. Rightly reasoned, and in his own division; and, by my troth, there's one meaning well suited. D. Pedro. Whom have you offended, masters, that you are thus bound to your answer? this learned constable is too cunning to be understood: What's your offence? Bora. Sweet prince, let me go no further to mine answer; do you hear me, and let this count kill me. I have deceived even your very eyes: what your wisdoms could not discover, these shallow fools have brought to light; who, in the night, over. heard me confessing to this man, how Don John your brother incensed me to slander the lady Hero'; how you were brought into the orchard, and saw me court Margaret in Hero's garments; how you disgraced her, when you should marry her: my villainy they have upon record; which I had rather seal with my death, than repeat over to my shame: the lady is dead upon mine and my master's false accusation; and, briefly, I desire nothing but the reward of a villain. D. Pedro. Runs not this speech like iron through your blood? Claud. I have drunk poison whiles he utter'd it. D. Pedro. But did my brother set thee on to this? Bora. Yea, and paid me richly for the practice of it. D. Pedro. He is compos'd and fram'd of treachery : And fled he is upon this villainy. Claud. Sweet Hero! now thy image doth appear In the rare semblance that I loved it first. Dogb. Come, bring away the plaintiffs; by this time our Sexton hath reformed signior Leonato of the matter: and masters, do not forget to specify, when time and place shall serve, that I am aur ass. Verg. Here, here comes master signior Leonato, and the Sexton too. Re-enter Leonato and Antonio, with the Sexton. Leon. Which is the villain? Let me see his eyes; That when I note another man like him, I may avoid him: Which of these is he? Bora. If you would know your wronger look on me. Leon. Art thou the slave, that with thy breath hast kill'd Mine innocent child? Bora: Yea, even I alone. Leon. No, not so, villain; thon bely'st thyself? Here stand a pair of honourable men, A third is fled, that had a hand in it: I thank you, princes, for my daughter's death; of it. Can lay upon my sin: yet sinn'd I not, But in mistaking. .D. Pedro. By my soul, nor I; And yet, to satisfy this good old man, I would bend under any heavy weight That he'll enjoin me to. Leon. I cannot bid you bid my daughter live, How innocent she died: and, if your love : F |