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Sir And. But it becomes me well enough, does 't not?
Sir To. Excellent! it hangs like flax on a diftaff ; and I hope to fee a house-wife take thee between her légs, and spin it off.
Sir And. Faith, I'll home to-morrow, Sir Toby; your. niece will not be seen, or, if she be, it's four to one she'll none of me: the Duke himself here, hard by, wooes her:
Sir To. She'll none o'th'Duke, she'll not match-above her degree, neither in estate, years, nor wit; I have heard her swear it. Tut, there's life in't, man. Sir And. I'll stay a month longer. I am
a fellow o'th' ftrangest mind i'th' world: I delight in masks and revels sometimes altogether.
Fir To. Art thou good at these kick-haws, Knight?
Sir And. As any man in Illyria whatsoever he be, under the degree of my betters ; and yet I will not. compare with an old man.
Sir To. What is thy excellence in a galliard, Knight?
Sir And. And, I think, I have the back: trick, fim. ply as strong as any man in Hlyria..
Sir To. Wherefore are these things hid ? wherefore have these gifts a curtain before 'em are they like to: take duft, like Mistress Mall's picture? why doft thou: not go to church in a galliard, and come home in a. coranto ? my very walk
should be a jig! I would not so much as make water, but in a sink-a-pace : what doft chou mean? is it a world to hide virtues in? I did.
I cannot pass over the remarkable conundrum betwixt Sir Andrew wishing he had follow'd the Arts, and Sir Toby's application of ihis. to the using art in improving his bair: because I would observe, what i variety and what a contrast of character the Poet has preserv'd in this pair of ridiculous Knights. Sir Toby has moderate natural parts, and a finattering of education ; which makes him always to be running his wit, and gives him a predominance over the other. Sir Androw: is a block head by nature, and unimproved by any acquirements from art, and so is made the very aavil to imposition and ridicule.
think, by the excellent conftitution of thy leg, it was form'd under the star of a galliard.
Sir And. Ay, 'tis strong, and it does indifferent welt in a fame-colour'd fockingShall we set about some revels ?
Sir To. What shall we do else: were we not born under Taurus?
Sir Anda Taurus? that's sides and heart.
Sir To. No, Sir, it is legs and thighs. Let me see thee caper; ha! higher: ba, ha! excellent.
SCENE changes to the Palace.
Enter Valentine, and Viola in man's attire,
Cesario, you are like to be much advanced; he hath known you but three days, and already you are no ftranger.
Vio. You either fear his humour, or my negligence, that
you call in question the continuance of bis love. Is he incontant, Şir, in his favours?
Val. No, believe me,
Enter Duke, Curio, and Attendants.
Kio. I thank you : here comes the Duke.
kio. Sure, my noble Lord,
Duke. Be clamorous, and leap all civil-bounds, Rather than make unprofited return.
Vio. Say, I do speak with her, my Lord; what then?
Duke. O, then, unfold the passion of my love,
Dio. I think not so, my Lord..
Duke. Dear lad, believe it:
best To woo your Lady ; yet, a barful ftrife!: Who-e'er I woo, 'myself would be his wife. (Exeunta! SCENE changes to Olivia's House.
Enter Maria and Clown. Mar.
or I will not open my lips fo wide as bristle may enter, in way of thy'exçase; my Lady will hang thee for thy absence.
Clo.. Let her hang me; he, that is well hang'd in this world, needs fear no colours,
Mar. Make that good. Clo. He thall see none to fear. Mar. A good lenten anfwer: I can tell thee where that faying was born, of, I fear no colours,
Clo. Where, good mistress Mary??
Mar. In the wars, and that may you be bold to say in your foolery
Clo. Well, God give them wisdom that have it; and those that are fools, let them use their talents.
Mar. Yet you will be hang'd for being so long ab. fent, or be turned away ; is not that as good as a hang: ing to you?
Clo. Marry, a good hanging prevents a bad marriage; and for turning away, let summer bear it out.
Mar. You are resolute then?
Clo. Not so neither, but I am resolv'd on two points.
Mar. That if one break, the other will hold; or, if both break, your gafkins fall.
Clo. Apt, in good faith ; very apt: well, go thy way, if Sir Toby would leave drinking, thou wert as wiity a piece of Eve's fesh as any in Illyria.
Mar. Peace, you rogue, no more o’that: here comes my Lady; make your excuse wisely, you were best.
[Exit; Enter Olivia, and Malvolio. Clo. Wit, and't be thy will, put me into good fooling! those wits, that think they have thee, do very oft prove fools; and I, that am sure I lack thee, may pass for a wise man. For what says Quinapalus, better a witty fool than a foolish wit. God bless thee, Lady!
Oli. Take the fool away.
Oli. Go to, y'are a dry fool; I'll no more you ; besides, you grow dishonest
Clo. Two faults, Madona, that drink and good counset will amend; for give the dry fool drink, then is the fool not dry: bid the dishonest man mend himself; if he mend, he is no longer dishonest; if he cannot, let the botcher mend him. Any thing, that's mended, is but patch'd ; virtue, that transgresses, is but patch'd with fin; and fin, that amends, is but patch'd with virtue. If that this simple syllogism will serve, so; if
the Lady of
it will not, what remedy? as there is no true cuckold but calamity, so beauty's a flower: the Lady bade take away the fool, therefore, I say again, take her away.
Oli. Sir, I bade them take away you.
Cl. Misprifion in the highest degree.---Lady, Cucullus non facit monachum; that's as much as to say, I wear not motley in my brain : good Madona, give me leave to prove you a fool.
Oli. Can you do it?
Clo. I must catechize you for it, Madona ; good my mouse of virtue, answer me.
Oli. Well, Sir, for want of other idleness, I'll bide your proof.
Cl. Good Madona, why mourn'st thou ?
Clo. The more fool you, Madona, to mourn for your brother's foul being in heav'n: take away the fool, gentlemen.
Oli, What think you of this fool, Malwolio, doth he not mend?
Mal. Yes, and shall do, 'till the pangs of death fake him. 'Infirmity, that decays the wise, doth ever make better the fool.
Clo. God send you, Sir, a speedy infirmity, for the better increafing your folly! Sir Toły will be fworn, that I am no fox; but he will not pass his word for two pence,
you are no fool. tê Oli. How say you to that, Malvolio?
Mal. I marvet, your Ladyship takes delight in such a barren rascal ; I saw him put down the other day' with an ordinary fool, that has no more brain than a ftone. Look you now, he's out of his guard already; unless you laugh and minister occasion to him, he is gagg'd. I protest, I take these wise men, that crow fo at these fet kind of fools, no better than the fools Zanies.