arch Wag of my Acquaintance used to describe very well, by calling them Sheep in Wolves Cloathing. I have often wondered, that honeft Gentlemen, who are good Neighbours, and live quietly in their own Poffeffions, should take it in their Heads to frighten the Town after this unreasonable Manner. I fhall think myself obliged, if they perfift in fo unnatural a Drefs (notwithstanding any Pofts they may have in the Militia) to give away their Red Coats to any of the Soldiery who fhall think fit to ftrip them, provided the faid Soldiers can make it appear, that they belong to a Regiment where there is a Deficiency in the Cloathing.

ABOUT Two Days ago I was walking in the Park, and accidentally met a Rural 'Squire, cloathed in all the Types above-mentioned, with a Carriage and Behaviour made entirely out of his own Head. He was of a Bulk and Stature larger than ordinary, had a Red Coat, flung open to fhew a gay Calamanco Wastcoat: His Periwig fell in a very confiderable Bush upon each Shoulder: His Arms naturally fwang at an unreasonable Distance from his Sides; which, with the Advantage of a Cane that he brandifhed in a great Variety of irregular Motions, made it unfafe for any one to walkwithin feveral Yards of him. In this Manner he took up the whole Mall, his Spectators moving on each Side of it, whilft he cocked up his Hat, and marched directly for Westminster. I cannot tell who this Gentleman is, ' for my Comfort may say with the Lover in Terence loft.Sight of a fine young Lady: Where-ever thou canst not be long concealed:

St. James's Coffee-boufe, Nove

BY Letters from Paris of the that the French King, the Irin Elector of Bavaria, had l fants.

WHEREAS

That I am in P

but who thou art,

16th we are inform'd es of the Blood, and the tely killed Fifty five Phea

veral have induftriously spread abroad, artnership with Charles Lillie, the PerCorner of Beauford Buildings; I must say with my Friend Partridge, that they are Knaves who re

fumer at the

M 5

ported

ported it. However, fince the faid Charles has promised that all his Cuftomers fhall be mine, I must defire all mine to be his; and dare anfwer for him, that if you ask in my Name for Snuff, Hungary or Orange Water, you shall have the beft the Town affords, at the cheapest Rate.

Illud maxime rarum genus eft eorum, qui aut excellente ingenii magnitudine, aut præclara eruditione atque do&trina, aut utraque re ornati, Spacium deliberandi habuerunt, quem potiffimum vitæ curfum fequi vellent.

Tull. Offic. Thofe Men are very scarce, who, either adorned with an excellent Wit, or extraordinary Learning, or both, have taken Time to deliberate what Course of Life they would particularly follow.

N° 97.

H

Tuesday, November 22, 1709.

From my own Apartment, November 21.

AVING fwept away prodigious Multitudes in my last Paper, and brought a great Destruction upon my own Species, I must endeavour in this to raise fresh Recruits, and, if poffible, to fupply the Places of the Unborn and the Deceased. It is faid of Xerxes, That when he stood upon a Hill, and faw the whole Country round him covered with his Army, he burst out into Tears, to think that not one of that Multitude would be alive an Hundred Years after. For my Part, when I take a Survey of this populous City, I can fcarce forbear Weeping, to fee how few of its Inhabitants are now living. It was with this Thought that I drew up, my Jaft Bill of Mortality, and endeavoured to fet out in it the great Number of Perfons who have perished by a Distemper (commonly known by the Name of Idleness) which has long raged in the World, and deftroys more

251 in every great Town than the Plague has done at Dantzick. To repair the Mischief it has done, and flock the World with a better Race of Mortals, I have more Hopes of bringing to Life those that are young, than of reviving thofe that are old. For which Reason, I fhall here fet down that noble Allegory which was written by an old Author called Prodicus, but recommended and embellished by Socrates. It is the Description of Virtue and Pleasure, making their Court to Hercules under the Appearance of two beautiful Women.

WHEN Hercules, fays the divine Moralift, was in that Part of his Youth, in which it was natural for him to confider what Courfe of Life he ought to pursue, he one Day retired into a Defart, where the Silence and Solitude of the Place very much favoured his Meditations. As he was mufing on his prefent Condition, and very much perplexed in himself on the State of Life he fhould chufe, he faw two Women of a larger Stature than ordinary approaching towards him. One of them had a very noble Air, and graceful Deportment; her Beauty was natural and easy, her Perfon clean and unfpotted, her Eyes caft towards the Ground with an agreeable Reserve, her Motion and Behaviour full of Modefty, and her Raiment as white as Snow. The other had a great deal of Health and Floridnefs in her Countenance, which fhe had helped with an artificial White and Red, and endeavoured to appear more graceful than ordinary in her Mien, by a Mixture of Affectation in all her Gestures. She had a wonderful Confidence and Affurance in her Looks, and all the Variety of Colours in her Dress that he thought were the most proper to fhew her Complexion to an Advantage. She call her Eyes upon herself, then turned them on thofe that were prefent, to fee how they liked her, and often looked on the Figure fhe made in her own Shadow. Upon her nearer approach to Hercules, the stepped before the other Lady, (who came forward with a regular compofed Carriage) and running up to him, accofted him after the following Manner.

MY dear Hercules (fays fhe) I find you are very much divided in your own Thoughts upon the Way of Life that you ought to chufe: Be my Friend,

and

I HAVE tranflated this Allegory for the Benefit of the Youth of Great Britain; and particularly of those who are still in the deplorable State of NonExistence, and whom I moft earnestly entreat to come into the World. Let my Embrio's fhew the least, Inclination to any fingle Virtue, and I fhall allow it to

ftruggling towards Birth. I don't expect of 'em that, like the Hero in the foregoing Story, they should go about as foon as they are born, with a Club in their Hands, and a Lion's Skin on their Shoulders, to root out Monsters, and deftroy Tyrants; but as the finest Author of all Antiquity has faid upon this very Occafion, Though a Man has not the Abilities to distinguish himfelf in the most fhining Parts of a great Character, he has certainly the Capacity of being just, faithful, modest, and temperate.

N° 98.

I

Thursday, November 24, 1709.

From my own Apartment, November 23.

READ the following Letter, which was left for me this Evening, with very much Concern for the Lady's Condition who fent it, who expreffes the State of her Mind with great Franknefs, as all People ought who talk to their Phyficians.

Mr. Bickerstaff,

T

HOUGH you are fricken in Years, and have had great Experience in the World, I believe you will fay, there are not frequently fuch difficult Occafions to act in with Decency as thofe wherein I am entangled. I am a Woman in Love, and that will allow to be the most unhappy of all Circumstances in human Life: Nature has formed us with a firong Reluctance against owning fuch a Paffion, and Custom has made it criminal in

you

us

us to make Advances. A Gentleman, whom I will call Fabio, has the entire Poffeffion of my Heart. I am fo intimately acquainted with him, that he makes no Scruple of communicating to me an ardent Affection he has for Cleora, a Friend of mine, who also makes me her Confident. Moft Part of my Life I am in Company with the one or the other, and am always entertained with his Paffion, or ber Triumph. Cleora is one of thofe Ladies, who think they are virtuous, if they are not guilty; and without any Delicacy of Choice, refolves to take the best Offer which shall be made to her. With this Profpect he puts off declaring berfelf in Favour of Fabio, till she fees what Lovers will fall into her Snares, which he lays in all Publick Places with all the Art of Gefture and Glances. This Refolution She has herself told me: Though I love him better than Life, I would not gain him by betraying Cleora, or com-. mitting fuch a Trefpafs against Modefty, as letting him know myself that I love him. You are an Aftrologer, What shall I do?

Diana Doubtful.

THIS Lady has faid very juftly, that the Condition of a Woman in Love is of all others the most miserable. Poor Diana! How muft fhe be racked with Jealousy, when Fabio talks of Cleora? How with Indignation when Cleora makes a Property of Fabio? A Female Lover is in the Condition of a Ghost, that wanders about its beloved Treasure, without Power to speak, till it is spoken to. I defire Diana to continue in this Circumftance; for I fee an Eye of Comfort in her Cafe, and will take all proper Measures to extricate her out of this unhappy Game of Crofs Purposes. Since Cleora is upon the Catch with her Charms, and has no particular Regard for Fabio, I fhall place a Couple of fpecial Fellows in her Way, who fhall both addrefs to her, and have each a better Estate than Fabio. They are both already taken with her, and are preparing for being of her Retinue the enfuing Winter.

TO Women of this Worldly Turn, as I apprehend Cleora to be, we must reckon backward in our Computation of Merit; and when a fair Lady thinks only of making her Spouse a convenient Domeftick, the Notion

of