bespotted with petty sins and insignificant iniquities. The truest balance may fail, no matter how well it be adjusted; and a few intoxicating drops may sometimes find their way accidentally into the soda of temperance. Some temptations are strong-very strong. If they can't draw an omnibus half a mile, they are strong enough to snap the stoutest halter of resolution ever twisted by the human will. Oh, it is most amazing hard to resist some of the temptations that beset us as we journey through life! If the spirit wrestle with them, there is danger of its getting the worst of it. But I would have you, my friends, give them a try in all cases; for there is no telling what MIGHT be done, since Samson slew the Philistines. So mote it be!

EATING, DRINKING, AND THINKING.

TEXT.-If a man would be dry, let him drink, drink, drink,
If a man would be wise, let him think, think, think,
If a man would be rich, he must work, work, work,
If he would be fat, eat pork, pork, pork.

BUT IF,

A man with ease would study, he must eat, eat, eat,
But little at dinner, of his meat, meat, meat;
And a youth, to be distinguished in his art, art, art,
Must keep the girls away from his heart, heart, heart.

MY HEARERS: To keep continually dry, always wear an oilcloth dress, carry a good umbrella, and practise rum-drinking. The first two articles, however, are only essential in protecting the outside from superabundant moisture; but the latter keeps the inside as dry as a stove-pipe. I never knew a drinker but was eternally dry-dry in all kinds of weather. He goes to bed dry, gets up dry, and keeps himself dry through the day. It's not to be wondered at; for how can he be otherwise than dry, when he keeps the blue blazes of hell constantly burning in his bosom, by pouring double-distilled damnation down his throat? In fact, my brethren, the drunkard is for ever dry. The more he drinks the drier he grows; on his deathbed he calls for "one more drink for the last," and then goes out of the world as thirsty as though he had lived upon salt codfish all the days of his life.

My friends: if you would be wise, you must think, think, think. It's a matter of doubt to me whether flighty fools or intelligent dogs do the most thinking. You, perhaps, think you think as much as the greatest of philosophers; but the deuce of it is, what do you think about, and what does it amount to? The gems of wisdom lie deeply buried, and they can be obtained only by great mental toil. You must dig for them, like a dog for a woodchuck, or you don't get them.

My hearers: if you would be rich you must work-work like new cider. Idleness eats big holes through one's coat, jacket, and trou sers, and never provides means to mend them. You must WORK your way to wealth, or you'll never get it. By bodily and brainly

exertion, remove every obstacle that Doubt and Fear have implanted in your paths-blast, if necessary, the rock of salvation-and you will acquire riches; but look out that you do not bring a plague upon your peace, and lose your own soul at last.

My dear friends: if you would be fat, eat pork and every other kind of adipose matter; and you will get as fat as a hog, and twice as stupid. I have nothing further to say upon this point.

But if, my hearers, you would study with ease, and have the mind as active as a squirrel in a cage, you must be careful not to weary the stomach with an overload of meat and vegetables. The brains and the belly are near neighbours-chum companions. They are so identified, that whatever affects the one is sure to move the other. Fancy wont stay about the premises while a cart-load of roast beef and plum pudding is undergoing the process of digestion: and Imagination takes wing to get out of smelling distance of the disgustful mass. To think clearly, you must eat little and stir your stumps.

My young he friends: if you would make much headway in the world, and arrive at any degree of proficiency in your undertakings, you must keep the girls away from your heart. They are troublesome insects, we all know; but you mustn't let them bother you when business demands your undivided attention. Better marry them at once-commit matrimonial suicide-than allow them to plague you for a moment. So mote it be!

ON ATTRACTION.

TEXT.-Attraction is a curious power,

That none can understand;
Its influence is everywhere,

In water, air, and land.

It operates on everything

The sea, the tide, the weather;

It brings the sexes close, smack up,
And binds them fast together.

MY HEARERS: Attraction is a mysterious principle in nature whereby one particle or substance is drawn to, or directed towards another. It bears upon the immaterial as well as the material— upon mind as well as matter-and where or how it obtains its power is yet an unsolved problem in the science of prossleology. The magnetic needle naturally points to the north star, when not swayed by some more immediate influence; and so our thoughts-when unhitched from the heavy cars of care and business, or detached from the lighter vehicles of earthly pleasure—are naturally attracted to a higher world than this.

At night, especially, the imagination is called away, to gambol in the golden sunlight, and gather the unfading flowers of the spiritland. When the shades of evening darken about us, our dormant fancies begin to rise, like white-winged moths from the meadows,

and revel in the starry realms of ideality. They betake themselves upward, as naturally as chickens fly up to roost. Repulsed by the gloom and melancholy that settle upon all things below, and attracted by the cheerfulness of the prospect above, they quit the dull earth, and speed to those silvery isles of the blest that gem the dark blue ocean of heaven-there to transplant a few of the mundane roses of hope, that shall bloom with immortal freshness and beauty, when the young flowers of the heart have all faded, and the blossoms of joy are fast dropping from the fair garland of life. This is all the consequence of attraction, my friends. When Aurora hoists the flood-gates of the morn, and inundates half the world with a deluge of glory, attraction confines our thoughts to the earth; for then terrestrial objects wear such a serene and lovely look, and our spirits are so lively and buoyant, that we feel as if we should like to stay here for ever, and dance an annual jig with old father Time, in commemoration of his happy marriage with Eternity.

The

My friends: you can see the effects of attraction everywhere. Children, like vegetables, are attracted upward in growth by the sun, rain, and atmosphere, till they arrive at maturity; then the earth exerts a counter attraction, and they gradually bow down to the dust, till finally they sink into it, and disappear for ever. drunkard, while reeling homeward from the doggery, is attracted by both sides of the street, which accounts for his diagonal movements; and the hope of a comfortable snooze in his own domicile ahead attracts him onward. One particular side of that fashionable thoroughfare to ruin called Broadway, possesses positive attraction, as any one may see; and that house, in which dwells an adorable and adored young damsel, contains attraction enough to draw a beau of two hundred pounds weight, half a mile out of the direct way from his boarding-house to the counting-room. There is a mysterious, mutual attraction between the sexes that my philosophy can't unravel. They seem bound to approximate by a law of nature; and human law is no more of a barrier in their way than a brush fence is to a mad bull in fly-time, or a mud-puddle to the progress of gospel truth. You might place, my friends, a lot of girls in one part of the labyrinths of Egypt, and a parcel of fellows in another, with the most mazy and difficult windings between-blindfold and mouth-gag them all and leave them to themselves-and my word for it, you would find them all in a heap in less than twenty minutes! Such is the marvellous power of attraction. It operates, as my text says, upon everything the sea, the tides, the weather; but more palpable are its workings upon the he's and she's of humanity. They will get together, as naturally as seeds of allspice floating in a barrel of hot rum. His influence upon a couple of lovers is at first gradual and almost imperceptible; but watch them, and you will find that they keep nearing each other by hitches, with increased warmth and velocity, till, at length, they are brought "smack up" at the altar of Hymen, and fastened together for life-close-riveted, double-pegged, and back-stitched-so firmly adhered to one another,

that no mortal hath power to rip them asunder. Then, as they twain are one flesh, the husband has a perfect right to flog his wife as an atonement for his own sins, and she the privilege of pulling his hair for whatever errors she may commit. Surely, the married are favoured with liberties and comforts which the unwedded never can enjoy !

Now, my dear friends, I want you to let those things influence you the most that are the most attractive in themselves; those are virtue, love, benevolence, morality, justice, and truth. Let these be your objects of admiration through life, and you will lay up large quantities of consolation from the broad platters of peace, amid the trials and tribulations of a vexing world. So mote it be!

ILLS IN MAN'S ESTATE.

TEXT.-Though trouble springs not from the dust,
Nor sorrow from the ground,
Yet ills on ills, by heaven's decree,
In man's estate are found.

As sparks in close succession rise,

So man, the child of woe,

Is doomed to endless care and toils,
Through all his life below.

MY HEARERS: Trouble, generally speaking, does not spring from the dust; and yet I have known that element to produce it in large quantities. I drive on the Third Avenue of a dry afternoon, with a slow horse and a FAST woman, which will attest the fact for to be covered with dust and indignity produces feelings that cause the ants of trouble to crawl about the heart in a most industrious manner. To carry superfluous dust upon your shoes into a parlour causes trouble to the lady of the house-and kicking up a dust at a political caucus creates troubles enough to dim the fair prospect of an election. Mosquitoes, fleas, and bedbugs are troubles that try both the flesh and the spirit, which, if they don't spring from the dust, are generated by mud and filth, its first cousins. So you perceive, my friends, that troubles, despite the text, do sometimes originate from dust; and, since it is our lot to be disturbed by them, we must endeavour to bear them with as good a face as possible-ay, as philosophers while submitting to a toothpulling operation.

My hearers: Sorrow also arises from the ground: the tares in our wheat-fields cause sorrow to many-the miasmas bred by swamps are sources of sickness and sorrow to more-and the sorrows that came from the ground upon Egypt of old were a sore trial for thousands. But, my dear hearers, these are nothing to the ills sprinkled upon us from the hand of heaven. These fall so thickly around us, that to attempt to escape them were like dodging between the rain-drops of a summer shower. When I think of the

multiplied, multifarious, and multitudinous ills that lie in wait for us all, I can't help wondering how so many as there are do contrive to reach the summit of life's hill, comparatively unscratched. Headaches, corn-aches, tooth-aches, bel-stomach-aches, sores, wounds, bruises, gout, rheumatism, cramps, spasms, convulsions, wens, corns, cancers, consumption, a choice variety of fevers, and hosts of other bodily complaints, render the road of existence a rough one at the best. Then inwardly we have care, that pricks the bosom with its porcupine quills-grief, that soaks and dissolves India-rubbersorrow, that flings deep and gloomy shadows along the once bright vista of memory-disappointment, that embitters the sweet cup of anticipation-doubt, that keeps the mind in a fog, and plucks many a feather from the wings of Hope-and despair, that wraps the soul in midnight darkness, thick enough to work at with a pickaxe and spade.

Such, my friends, are a few of the ills that abound in man's estate. They spring up around him as sparks in close succession rise; and no sooner is one extinguished than another makes itself distinguished. [I was attacked and almost assassinated, last night, by a ferocious bedbug; but, as he was without accessories, I eventually managed to despatch him.] But, as I have said before, and to speak superlatively, the best way for us to do is to face them courageously-put up with their petty annoyances, and defend ourselves as well as we can from their fatal stabs. However, since we are born of woman, we must expect that our days will be few and full of trouble: for, by woman's sin came death into the world, with all its preliminary arrangements, and by her transgression, the primitive poison still circulates in the veins of posterity. Since, then, the fountain of humanity was rendered corrupt by the power of the devil and the weakness of woman, we must expect that the whole waters of our lives will be more or less muddy. Physical ills, as well as mental diseases, will attack us in dreadful array, down to the generation that shall bare its bosom to the general judgment. Moral infirmities will continue to increase with the growth of wealth, fashion, and REFINEMENT: these will beget bodily ailments; and careful ills will produce an unhealthy action of the mental and intellectual organs. Such a direfully downward progress must certainly, if continued, eventuate in the destruction of all that inhabit the earth. As for me, myself, I give up all for lost; but the saving power of Providence, and what little is left of moral saltpetre, may yet wonderfully effect a salvation-which is ardently to be hoped for, but very little expected. So mote it be!