the heart continually cries gammon, is of no more use than talking Choctaw to Chinese.

7. Heaven understands no gibberish; it knows only the pure, simple language of the spirit-the soul's vernacular. So, when you pray, do it in as simple a manner as possible, but with red hot earnestness, and your souls will find rest wherever you are -whether nibbling at a crust in Poverty Hollow, or half starving in California, while endeavoring to transmogrify a bag of gold dust into an Indian meal pudding.

LESSON XXIX.

ONE GOOD TURN DESERVES ANOTHER.

MRS. GILMAN.

1. WILL WAG Went to see Charley Quirk,
More famed for his books than his knowledge,
In order to borrow a work

He had sought for in vain over college.

2. But Charley replied, "My dear friend,

You must know I have sworn and agreed,
My books from my room not to lend,

But you may

sit by my fire and read.

3. Now it happened by chance on the morrow,
That Quirk, with a cold, quivering air,
Came, his neighbor Will's bellows to borrow,
For his own they were out of repair.

4. But Willy replied, "My dear friend,

I have sworn and agreed, you must know,
That
my bellows I never will lend,

But you may sit by my fire and blow."

LESSON XXX.

ORATOR PUFF.

ANONYMOUS.

1. MR. ORATOR PUFF had two tones in his voice,
The one, squeaking thus, and the other down so;
In each sentence he utter'd he gave you your choice,
For one half was B alt, and the rest G below.

Oh! oh! Orator Puff,

One voice for an orator's surely enough.

2. But he still talked away, spite of coughs and of frowns, So distracting all ears with his ups and his downs, That a wag once, on hearing the orator say,

"My voice is for war," ask'd him, "Which of them, pray?' Oh! oh! &c.

3. Reeling homeward one evening, top-heavy with gin, And rehearsing his speech on the weight of the crown, He tripp'd near a saw-pit, and tumbled right in,

"Sinking fund,” the last words as his noddle came down. Oh! oh! &c.

4. "Good Lord!" he exclaimed, in his he-and-she tones, "Help me out! help me out! I have broken my bones! "Help you out?" said a Paddy, who pass'd, "what s bother!

Why, there's two of you there; can't you help cne an· other?"

Oh! oh! Orator Puff,

One voice for an orator's surely enough.

LESSON XXXI.

THE GRAHAM SYSTEM.

ANONYMOUS.

1. On! wondrous age, surpassing ages past! When mind is marching at a quick-step pace; When steam and politics are flying fast,

When roads to rails, and wine to tea give place; When great reformers race, and none can stay 'emOh! Jackson, Tappan, Symmes, Sam Patch and Grahain 2. The last shall be the first-'twere shame to think

That thou, starvation's monarch, could'st be beaten; Who proved that drink was never made to drink, Nor food itself intended to be eaten : That Heaven provided for our use instead, The sand and saw-dust which compose thy bread. A startling truth!-we question while we stare— A ling'ring doubt still haunts the imagination, That God ne'er meant to stint us in our fare;

No doubt a prejudice of education;

For fact is fact—this ought to make us humble-
Our brains confess it, though our stomachs grumble.

4. But why on us pursue thy cruel plan?

Oh, why condemn us thus to bread and water?
Perchance thou countest all the race of man,

As rogues and culprits who deserve no quarte
And 'tis thy part to punish, not to spare,
By putting us upon state-prison fare.

5. All flesh is poison, in thy sapient eyes;

No doubt thou'rt right, and all mankind are wrong, But still, in spite of us, the thought will rise, How, eating poison, men have lived so long;

Mayhap thou meanest a slow poison, then,
Which takes effect at three-score-years-and-ten.

6. Our table treasures vanish one by one,

Beneath thy wand, like Sancho's, they retire; Now steaks are rare, and mutton-chops are done, Veal's in a stew, the fat is in the fire; Fish, flesh, and fowl are ravish'd in a trice— "Insatiate Graham! could not one suffice?"

7. When wine was banished by the cruel fates,
Oh, gentle tea, for thee I trembled then;
"The cup which cheers but not inebriates,"
Not even thou must grace our boards again!
Imperial is dethroned, as I forboded;
Bohea is dish'd, gunpowder is exploded!

8. Venison is vile, a cup of coffee curst,

And food that's fried, or fricasseed, forgot; Duck is destruction, wine of woes is worst, Clams are condemned, and poultry's gone to pot Pudding and pork are under prohibition, Mustard is murder, pepper is perdition!

9. But dread'st thou not some famished foe may rise, With vengeful arm, and break thy daring jaw? Thou robber of our vitals' best supplies,

Beware!"there is no joking with the maw," Nor hope the world will in thy footsteps follow, Thy bread and doctrine are too hard to swallow.

23

LESSON XXXII.

MADE TO SELL.

ANONYMOUS.

1. A FELLOW. in a market-town,

Most musical, cried razors, up and down,
And offered twelve for eighteen-pence;
Which, certainly, seem'd wondrous cheap,
And, for the money, quite a heap,

That every man would buy, with cash and sense.

2. A country bumpkin the great offer heard;
Poor Hodge who suffer'd by a broad, black beard,
That seemed a shoe-brush stuck beneath his nose,
With cheerfulness the eighteen-pence he paid,
And proudly to himself in whispers said-
"This rascal stole the razors, I suppose.

3. "No matter if the fellow be a knave,
Provided that the razors shave;

It certainly will be a monstrous prize."
So home the clown, with his good fortune, went
Smiling, in heart and soul content,

And quickly soaped himself to ears and eyes.

4. Being well lathered from a dish or tub, Hodge now began with grinning pain to grub, Just like a hedger cutting furze;

'Twas a vile razor! — then the rest he tried; All were impostors. "Ah!" Hodge sighed,

"I wish my eighteen-pence was in my purse."

5. In vain, to chase his beard, and bring the graces,

He cut, and dug, and whined, and stamped, and swore; Brought blood, and danced, blasphemed, and made wry faces,

And cursed each razor's body o'er and o'er.