Just. No more? We need no more. Sirrah, be drawing Just. Whether you are or no, confess; Merc. If I were Guilty, your rhetoric could not fetch it forth. But tho' I am innocent, I confess, that if I Were a stander-by, these circumstances urg'd, Which are true, would make me doubtless believe [he is) The accused parties to be guilty. Merc. I say no such thing. parties, Just. Write it down, I say; we'll try that. Pray God you did not kill him for my love! My husband lives, I know it, and I see him. Maria. No, as I hope for mercy. [that this Just. No, and 't been better For you too, an you had never known him. Maria. Why then, you did not know the world's chief joy: His face so manly as it had been made To fright the world; yet he so sweetly-temper'd, That he would make himself a natural fool, He was a man whose name I'll not out-live, Ant. And I will quit thy kindness. [Aside. Just. Before me, she has made the tears Stand in mine eyes! but I must be austere. Gentlewoman, you must confess this murder. Maria. I cannot, sir; I did it not. But I desire to see Those examinations which this gentleman [letters? But letters you say you had; where are those Mariu. Sir, they are gone. From me than you have. You examine an Gentleman and gentlewoman here. "Tis pity Such fools as you should be i'th' commission. Just. Say you so, post? take away that post! whip him, [post. And bring him again quickly. I'll hamper you, Merc. Tis Antonio; I know him now as What an irregular fool is this! [wellAnt. Whip me? hold off! [murmuring Maria. Oh, good sir, whip him! By his He should know something of my husband's death, [out! That may quit me: for God's sake, fetch it Just. Whip him, I say! [Antonio throws off his disguise. Ant. Who is't dares whip me now? Maria. Oh, my lov'd husband! Merc. My most worthy friend! Where have you been so long? Aut. I cannot speak for joy! [shall not Just. Why, what's the matter now? and Law then have her course? Andr. It shall have no other course Than it has, I think. Just. It shall have other course Before I go, or I'll beat my brains: and I say It was not honestly done of him to discover Himself before the parties accus'd were executed, That law might have had her course; for then The kingdom flourishes. [man; Ant. But such a wife as thou had never any And such a friend as he, believe me, wife, Shall never be! Good wife, love my friend; Friend, love my wife. Hark, friend! Just. Mark, Just. "Tis no matter; then the jailor shall be hang'd. Andr. You are deceiv'd in that too, sir; 'twas known To be against his will, and he hath got You shall stay dinner; I've a couple of brawling Neighbours, that I'll assure you won't agree, And you shall have the hearing of their matJust. With all my heart. [ter. Merc. Go, gentlemen, go in. Ric. Oh, Viola, that no succeeding age Might lose the memory of what thou wert! But such an overswayed sex is yours, That all the virtuous actions you can do Are but as men will call them: and I swear, 'Tis my belief, that women want but ways To praise their deeds, but men want deeds to praise. [Exeunt omnes. EPILOGUE. Tis ended; but my hopes and fears begin : In me to wish it favour. If this night I have my ends: and may such, for their grace Vouchsaf'd to this, find theirs in every place! 002 WIT WIT AT SEVERAL WEAPONS. A COMEDY. This Play is ascribed to Fletcher by the Commendatory Verses of Gardiner; the Epilogue, however, speaks of it as the production of both Authors. The first publication of it was in the folio of 1657. It was brought on the stage, altered by Colley Cibber, about the beginning of the present century, under the title of the Rival Fools, but without any success. Enter Sir Perfidious Oldcraft and Wittypate. Witty. SIR, I'm no boy; I'm deep in one and twenty, The second year's approaching. A youth to live by his wits then, I should think, thee, Olde. Ay, wits, sir; if it be so strange to I'm sorry spent that time to get a fool, I might have employ'd my pains a great deal better: [wits. Thou know'st all that I have I ha' got by my And yet to see how urgent thou art too! It grieves me thou art so degenerate To trouble me for means; I never offer'd it My parents from a school-boy; past nineteen once, (See what these times are grown to) before twenty [like I rush'd into the world, which is indeed much The art of swimming, he that will attain to't Must fall plump, and duck himself at first, And that will make him hardy and advent'rous; And not stand putting in one foot, and shiver, And then draw t'other after, like a quakebuttock; Well he may make a padler in the world, From hand to mouth, but never a brave swimmer, Borne up by th' chin, as I bore up myself, With my strong industry that never fail'd me; For he that lies borne up with patrimonies, Looks like a long great ass that swims with bladders: Come but one prick of adverse fortune to him, He sinks, because he never tried to swim, When him. When wit plays with the billows that choak'd Olde. Yes; if he mean to spoil him, This age's dullness! When I scarce writ man, The first degree that e'er I took in thriving, I lay intelligencer close for wenching: Could give this lord or knight a true certificate Of all the maidenheads extant; how many lay 'Mongst chambermaids, how many 'mongst exchange wenches (Tho' never many there, I must confess, They have a trick to utter ware so fast); I knew which lady had a mind to fall, Which gentlewoman new divorc'd, which tradesman breaking, The price of every sinner to a hair, And where to raise each price; which were the termers [gowns, That would give velvet petticoats, tissue Which pieces, angels, suppers, and half crowns: I knew how to match, and make my market; Could give intelligence where the pox lay lege, And then to see the lechers shift a point "Twas sport and profit too; how they would shun [fully, Their ador'd mistress' chambers, and run fearLike rats from burning houses; so brought I My clients o' the game still safe together, And noble gamesters lov'd me, and I felt it. Give me a man that lives by his wits, say I, And's never left a groat! there's the true gallant. When I grew somewhat pursy, I grew then In men's opinions too, and confidences; They put things call'd executorships upon me, The charge of orphans, little senseless creatures, [feltmakers, Whom in their childhoods I bound forth to To make 'em lose, and work away their gentry, [tom, Disguise their tender natures with hard cusSo wrought 'em out in time; there I rose ungently. Nor do I fear to discourse this unto thee; [courage The next best wit I can hear of, carries 'em : For since in my time and knowledge so many rich children Of the city conclude in beggary, I'd rather Make a wise stranger my executor Than a foolish son my heir, and have my lands call'd after [nature. My wit than after my name; and that's my Witty. 'Tis a strange harsh one! Must I still shift then? I come, brave cheats! once to my trade again! And I'll ply't harder now than e'er I did for't'. You'll part with nothing then, sir? Olde. Not a jot, sir. [go, sir, Witty. If I should ask you blessing ere I I think you would not give't me. Olde. Let me but hear thou liv'st by thy wits once, [mine else! Thou shalt have any thing; thou'rt none of Then why should I take care for thee? Witty. Thank your bounty! [Exit. Oldc. So wealth love me, and long life, I beseech it, As I do love the man that lives by his wits, He comes so near my nature! I'm grown old now, And even arriv'd at my last cheat, I fear me; But 'twill make shift to bury me, by daylight too. And discharge all my legacies, 'tis so wealthy, I have plac'd a trusty watchful guardianess, Fop of Fop-Hall he writes himself, (I take it, The ancient'st fop in England) with whom I've privately Compounded for the third part of her portion, Enter Sir Gregory Fop and Cunningham. And she seems pleas'd; so two parts rest with [he, sir? me. He's come. And we all strive to have him; nay 'tis certain Olde. I hope when you're married, sir, Greg. Why, what do you take me to be, ■ Than e'er I did for't.] Sympson reads, Than e'er I did before. Old |