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Prin. Good wits will be jangling; but, gentles, Who, tend'ring their own worth, from where they agree.
were glass'd, This civil war of wits were much better used Did point you to buy them, along as you pass’d. On Navarre and his book-men, for here 'tis abused. His face's own margin did quote such amazes, Boyet. If my observation, (which very seldom That all eyes saw his eyes enchanted with gazes. Jies,)
I'll give you Aquitain, and all that is his, By the heart's still rhetoric, disclosed with eyes, An you give him for my sake but one loving kiss. Deceive me not now, Navarre is infected.
Prin. Come to our pavilion: Boyet is dispos'dPrin. With what?
Boyet. But to speak that in words, which his eye Boyet. With that which we lovers entitle, af
hath disclos'd. fected.
I only have made a mouth of his eye, Prin. Your reason?
By adding a tongue, which I know will not lie. Boyet. Why, all his behaviours did make their Ros. Thou art an old love-monger, and speak'st retire
skilfully. To the court of his eye, peeping thorough desire : Mar. He is Cupid's grandfather, and learns news His heart, like an agate, with your print im
of him. pressed,
Ros. Then was Venus like her mother, for her Proud with his form, in his eye pride expressed:
father is but grim. His tongue, all impatient to speak and not see, Boyet. Do you hear, my mad wenches ? Did stumble with haste in his eye-sight to be; Mar.
No. All senses to that sense did make their repair, Boyet.
What then, do you see? To feel only looking on fairest of fair.
Ros. Ay, our way to be gone. Methought, all his senses were lock'd in his eye, Boyet.
You are too hard for me. As jewels in crystal for some prince to buy;
Scene I.-- Another part of the Same. out, upon the instant: by heart you love her, because
your heart cannot come by her; in heart you love Enter ARMADO and Moth.
her, because your heart is in love with her; and out Arm. Warble, child: make passionate my sense of heart you love her, being out of heart that you of hearing.
cannot enjoy her. Moth. Concolinel
[Singing Arm. I am all these three. Arm. Sweet air !-Go, tenderness of years: take Moth. And three times as much more, and yet this key, give enlargement to the swain, bring him nothing at all. festinately hither; I must employ him in a letter to Moth. Fetch hither the swain : he must carry me
a letter. Moth. Master, will you win your love with a Moth. A message well sympathised: a horse to French brawl?
be ambassador for an ass. Arm. How meanest thou? brawling in French? Arm. Ha, ha! what sayest thou ?
Moth. No, my complete master; but to jig off a Moth. Marry, sir, you must send the ass upon the tune at the tongue's end, canary to it with your feet, horse, for he is very slow-gaited: but I
go. humour it with turning up your eye-lids; sigh a Arm. The way is but short. Away! note, and sing a note; sometime through the throat, Moth. As swift as lead, sir. as if you swallowed love with singing love; some Arm. Thy meaning, pretty ingenious ? time through the nose, as if you snuffed up love by Is not lead a metal heavy, dull, and slow? smelling love; with your hat penthouse-like, o'er Moth. Minime, honest master; or rather, master, the shop of your eyes; with your arms crossed on your thin belly's doublet, like a rabbit on a spit; or Arm. I say, lead is slow. your hands in your pocket, like a man after the old Moth. You are too swift, sir, to say so: painting; and keep not too long in one tune, but a Is that lead slow which is fir’d from a gun! snip and away. These are complements, these are Arm. Sweet smoke of rhetoric ! humours; these betray nice wenches, that would He reputes me a cannon; and the bullet, that's he:
be betrayed without these, and make them men of I shoot thee at the swain. note, (do you note, men ?) that most are affected to Moth.
Thump then, and I flee. these.
(Erit. Arm. How hast thou purchased this experience ? Arm. A most acute juvenal; voluble and free of Moth. By my penny of observation.
grace! Arm. But 0,—but 0,
By thy favour, sweet welkin, I must sigh in thy face: Moth. the hobby-horse is forgot.
Most rude melancholy, valour gives thee place. Arm. Callest thou my love hobby-horse ? My herald is return'd.
Moth. No, master; the hobby-horse is but a colt, and your love, perhaps, a hackney. But have you
Re-enter Moth, with CoSTARD. forgot your love?
Moth. A wonder, master! here's a Costard broArm. Almost I had.
ken in a shin. Moth. Negligent student! learn her by heart. Arm. Some enigma, some riddle: come,—thy l'enArm. By heart, and in heart, boy.
voy ;-begin. Moth. And out of heart, master : all those three Cost. No egma, no riddle, no l'envoy! no salve in I will prove.
the male, sir : 0, sir, plantain, a plain plantain! no Arm. What wilt thou prove?
l'envoy, no l'envoy: no salve, sir, but a plantain. Moth. A man, if I live: and this, by, in, and with Arm. By virtue, thou enforcest laughter; thy
silly thought, my spleen; the heaving of my lungs fairer name than French crown. I will never buy provokes me to ridiculous smiling. O, pardon me, and sell out of this word. my stars! Doth the inconsiderate take salve for
Enter BIRON. l'envoy, and the word l'envoy for a salve ?
Moth. Do the wise men think them other ? is not Biron. O, my good knave Costard ! exceedingly l'entoy a salve ?
well met. Arm. No, page: it is an epilogue, or discourse, Cost. Pray you, sir, how much carnation ribbon to make plain
may a man buy for a remuneration ?
Cost. Marry, sir, half-penny farthing.
Cost. I thank your worship. God be wi' you. There's the moral: now the l'envoy.
Biron. O, stay, slave! I must employ thee: Moth. I will add the l'envoy. Say the moral again. As thou wilt win my favour, good my knave, Arm. The fox, the ape, and the humble-bee, Do one thing for me that I shall entreat. Were still at odds, being but three.
Cost. When would you have it done, sir?
Biron. O! this afternoon.
Cost. Well, I will do it, sir. Fare you well. Now will I begin your moral, and do you follow Biron. O! thou knowest not what it is. with my l'enroy.
Cost. I shall know, sir, when I have done it. The fox, the ape, and the humble-bee,
Biron. Why, villain, thou must know first. Were still at odds, being but three.
Cost. I will come to your worship to-morrow Arm. Until the goose came out of door,
morning. Staying the odds by adding four.
Biron. It must be done this afternoon. Hark, Moth. A good l'enroy, ending in the goose. Would slave, you desire more?
It is but this :Cost. The boy hath sold him a bargain, a goose, The princess comes to hunt here in the park, that's flat.
And in her train there is a gentle lady; Sir, your pennyworth is good, an your goose be fat. When tongues speak sweetly, then they name ber To sell a bargain well, is as cunning as fast and loose,
name, Let me see, a fat l'envoy; ay, that's a fat goose. And Rosaline they call her: ask for her, Arm. Come hither, come hither. How did this And to her white hand see thou do commend argument begin?
This seal'd-up counsel. There's thy guerdon : go. Moth. By saying that a Costard was broken in a
[Gives him money. shin.
Cost. Guerdon.-0! sweet guerdon! better than Then callid you for the l'envoy.
remuneration; eleven-pence farthing better. Most Cost. True, and I for a plantain: thus came your sweet guerdon !- I will do it, sir, in print.-Guerdon argument in ;
[Exit. Then the boy's fat l'envoy, the goose that you bought, Biron. O!—And I, forsooth, in love! I, that have And he ended the market.
been love's whip; Arm. But tell me; how was there a Costard bro A very beadle to a humorous sigh; ken in a shin?
A critic, nay, a night-watch constable Moth. I will tell you sensibly.
A domineering pedant o'er the boy, Cost. Thou hast no feeling of it, Moth: I will Than whom no mortal so magnificent! speak that l'envoy.
This wimpled, whining, purblind, wayward boy; I, Costard, running out, that was safely within, This senior-junior, giant-dwarf, Dan Cupid; Fell over the threshold, and broke my shin. Regent of love-rhymes, lord of folded arms, Arm. We will talk no more of this matter. Th’anointed sovereign of sighs and groans, Cost. Till there be more matter in the shin. Liege of all loiterers and malcontents, Arm. Sirrah Costard, I will enfranchise thee. Dread prince of plackets, king of cod-pieces,
Cost. O! marry me to one Frances ?-I smell Sole imperitor, and great general some l'enroy, some goose, in this.
Of trotting paritors, (O my little heart!) Arm. By my sweet soul, I mean, setting thee And I to be a corporal of his field, at liberty, enfreedoming thy person : thou wert im And wear his colours like a tumbler's hoop! mured, restrained, captivated, bound.
What? I love! I sue! I seek a wife! Cost. True, true; and now you will be my pur A woman, that is like a German clock, gation, and let me loose.
Still a repairing, ever out of frame, Arm. I give thee thy liberty, set thee from And never going aright; being a watch, durance; and, in lieu thereof, impose on thee nothing But being watch'd that it may still go right? but this : bear this significant to the country maid Nay, to be perjur’d, which is worst of all; Jaquenetta. There is remuneration; for the best And, among three, to love the worst of all; ward of mine honour is rewarding my dependents. A whitely wanton with a velvet brow, Moth, follow.
[Exit. With two pitch balls stuck in her face for eyes; Moth. Like the sequel, I.--Signior Costard, adieu. Ay, and, by heaven, one that will do the deed, Cost. My sweet ounce of man's flesh! my incony | Though Argus were her eunuch and her guard : Jew!
[Exit Moth. And I to sigh for her! to watch for her! Now will I look to his remuneration. Remuneration ! To
for her! Go to; it is a plague O! that's the Latin word for three farthings: three | That Cupid will impose for my neglect farthings, remuneration.—“What's the price of this of his almighty dreadful little might. inkle ? a penny :-No, I'll give you a remuneration :" | Well, I will love, write, sigh, pray, sue, groan; wly, it carries it.-Remuneration !- why, it is a Some men must love my lady, and some Joan. [Erit.
SCENE I.—Another part of the Same.
Prin. Only for praise ; and praise we may afford
To any lady that subdues a lord.
Enter Costard. Prin. Was that the king, that spurr'd his horse Prin. Here comes a member of the commonso hard
wealth. Against the steep uprising of the hill ?
Cost. God-dig-you-den all. Pray you, which is Boyet. I know not; but, I think, it was not he. the head lady? Prin. Whoe'er a' was, a’ show'd a mounting Prin. Thou shalt know her, fellow, by the rest mind.
that have no heads. Well, lords, to-day we shall have our despatch ; Cost. Which is the greatest lady, the highest ! On Saturday we will return to France.
Prin. The thickest, and the tallest. Then, forester, my friend, where is the bush,
Cost. The thickest and the tallest ? it is so; That we must stand and play the murderer in?
truth is truth. For. Hereby, upon the edge of yonder coppice; An your waist, mistress, were as slender as my wit, A stand where you may make the fairest shoot. One o' these maids' girdles for your waist should be Prin. I thank my beauty, I am fair that shoot,
fit. And thereupon thou speak'st the fairest shoot. Are not you the chief woman? you are the thickest For. Pardon me, madam, for I meant not so.
here. Prin. What, what? first praise me, and again Prin. What's your will, sir ? what's your will ?
Cost. I have a letter, from monsieur Biron to one O, short-liv'd pride! Not fair ? alack for woe!
lady Rosaline. For. Yes, madam, fair.
Prin. O, thy letter, thy letter! he's a good friend Prin. Nay, never paint me now:
of mine. Where fair is not, praise cannot mend the brow. Stand aside, good bearer.—Boyet, you can carve; Here, good my glass, take this for telling true.
Break up this capon. [Giving him money.
I am bound to serve.Fair payment for foul words is more than due. This letter is mistook; it importeth none here: For. Nothing but fair is that which you in- It is writ to Jaquenetta. herit.
We will read it, I swear. Prin. See, see! my beauty will be sav'd by Break the neck of the wax, and every one give ear. merit.
Boyet. [Reads.] “By heaven, that thou art fair, O heresy in fair, fit for these days!
is most infallible ; true, that thou art beauteous; A giving hand, though foul, shall have fair praise.— truth itself, that thou art lovely. More fairer than But come, the bow :—now mercy goes to kill, fair, beautiful than beauteous, truer than truth itself, And shooting well is then accounted ill.
have commiseration on thy heroical vassal! The Thus will I save my credit in the shoot :
magnanimous and most illustrate king Cophetua set Not wounding, pity would not let me do't;
eye upon the pernicious and indubitate beggar If wounding, then it was to show my skill, Penelophon; and he it was that might rightly say, That more for praise than purpose meant to kill. veni, vidi, vici ; which to anatomize in the vulgar, And, out of question, so it is sometimes :
(O base and obscure vulgar!) videlicet, he came, Glory grows guilty of detested crimes,
saw, and overcame: he came, one; saw, two; When, for fame's sake, for praise, an outward part, overcame, three. Who came ? the king; Why We bend to that the working of the heart; did he come ? to see; Why did he see? to overAs I for praise alone now seek to spill
come: To whom came he? to the beggar; What The poor deer's blood, that my heart means no saw he ? the beggar; Whom overcame he ? the ill.
beggar. The conclusion is victory: on whose side! Boyet. Do not curst wives hold that self-sove- the king's: the captive is enriched : on whose side ? reignty
the beggar's. The catastrophe is a nuptial: on Only for praise' sake, when they strive to be whose side? the king's ?—no, on both in one, or Lords o'er their lords?
one in both. I am the king, for so stands the com
parison; thou the beggar, for so witnesseth thy Cost. By my troth, most pleasant : how both did lowliness. Shall I command thy love? I may.
fit it! Shall I enforce thy love? I could. Shall I entreat Mar. A mark marvellous well shot, for they both thy love? I will. What shalt thou exchange for did hit [it]. rags ? robes; for tittles ? titles; for thyself? me. Boyet. A mark! O! mark but that mark: a Thns, expecting thy reply, I profane my lips on thy mark, says my lady. foot, my eyes on thy picture, and my heart on thy Let the mark have a prick in't, to mete at, if it every part. - Thine, in the dearest design of industry,
Mar. Wide o' the bow hand : i'faith, your hand “ Don ADRIANO DE ARMADO.
Cost. Indeed, a' must shoot nearer, or he'll ne'er * Thus dost thou hear the Nemean lion roar
hit the clout. 'Gainst thee, thou lamb, that standest as his
Boyet. An if my hand be out, then belike your prey ;
hand is in. Submissive fall his princely feet before,
Cost. Then will she get the upshot by cleaving And he from forage will incline to play: But if thou strive, poor soul, what art thou then! Mar. ome, come, you talk greasily; your lips Food for his rage, repasture for his den.” Prin. What plume of feathers is he that indited Cost. She's too hard for you at pricks, sir : this letter?
challenge her to bowl. What vane! what weather-cock ? did you ever hear Boyet. I fear too much rubbing. Good night, my better?
good owl. [Exeunt Boyer and Maria. Boyet. I am much deceiv'd, but I remember the Cost. By my soul, a swain! a most simple style.
clown! Prin. Else your memory is bad, going o'er it | Lord, lord! how the ladies and I have put him ere-while.
down! Boyet. This Armado is a Spaniard, that keeps O’my troth, most sweet jests! most incony vulgar here in court.
wit! A phantasm, a Monarcho, and one that makes sport When it comes so smoothly off, so obscenely, as it To the prince and his book-mates.
were, so fit. Prin.
Thou, fellow, a word. Armado o' the one side,-0, a most dainty man! Who gave thee this letter ?
To see him walk before a lady, and to bear her fan! Cost.
I told you; my lord. To see him kiss his hand! and how most sweetly Prin. To whom shouldst thou give it?
a' will swear! Cost.
From my lord to my lady. And his page o' t other side, that handful of wit ! Prin. From which lord, to which lady?
Ah, heavens, it is a most pathetical nit! Cost. From my lord Biron, a good master of mine, Sola, sola! [Shouting within.] [Exit CoSTARD. To a lady of France, that he call'd Rosaline. Prin. Thou hast mistaken his letter.—Come,
SCENE II.-The Same. away: Here, sweet, put up this: 'twill be thine another
Enter HOLOFERNES, Sir NATIANIEL, and Dull. day.
(Exeunt PRINCESS and train. Nath. Very reverend sport, truly; and done in Boyet. Who is the suitor ? who is the suitor ? the testimony of a good conscience. Ros.
Shall I teach you to know? Hol. The deer was, as you know, sanguis,-in Boyet. Ay, my continent of beauty.
blood; ripe as the pomewater,—who now hangeth Ros.
Why, she that bears the bow. like a jewel in the ear of cælo,—the sky, the welkin, Finely put off!
the heaven; and anon falleth like a crab, on the Boyet. My lady goes to kill horns; but if thou face of terra,—the soil, the land, the earth. marry,
Nath. Truly, master Holofernes, the epithets are Hang me by the neck, if horns that year miscarry. sweetly varied, like a scholar at the least: but, sir, Finely put on!
I assure ye, it was a buck of the first head. Ros. Well then, I am the shooter.
Hol. Sir Nathaniel, haud credo. Boyet.
And who is your deer? Dull. 'Twas not a haud credo, 'twas a pricket. Ros. If we choose by the horns, yourself: come Hol. Most barbarous intimation! yet a kind of
insinuation, as it were, in via, in way of explication; Finely put on, indeed!
facere, as it were, replication, or, rather, ostentare, Mar. You still wrangle with her, Boyet, and she to show, as it were, his inclination,-after his unstrikes at the brow.
dressed, unpolished, uneducated, unpruned, untrainBoyet. But she herself is hit lower. Have I hit ed, or rather unlettered, or, ratherest, unconfirmed her now?
fashion,—to insert again my haud credo for a deer. Ros. Shall I come upon thee with an old saying, Dull. I said, the deer was not a haud credo: 'twas that was a man when king Pepin of France was a a pricket. little boy, as touching the bit it?
Hol. Twice sod simplicity, bis coclus !—0, thou Boyei. So I may answer thee with one as old, monster ignorance, how deformed dost thou look! that was a woman when queen Guinever of Britain Nath. Sir, he hath never fed of the dainties that was a little wench, as touching the hit it.
are bred in a book; he hath not eat paper, as it Ros. Thou canst not hit it, hit it, hit it,
were ; he hath not drunk ink : his intellect is not Thou canst not hit it, my good man. replenished; he is only an animal, only sensible in Boyet. An I cannot, cannot, cannot,
the duller parts; An I cannot, another can.
And such barren plants are set before us, that we [Exeunt Ros. and Kath. thankful should be