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him an imperishable name. Since the days of the illustrious Robert Boyle, few of our patricians have distinguished themselves in the higher sciences, or as experimental philosophers. Boyle, it must be confessed, had an advantage-he was never at college; no more were Newton, Maclaurin, Wallis, Simpson, Napier; nor, in our own more immediate times, Sir Humphrey Davy, and some of our most eminent philosophers.
SCHOOLMASTER–A dealer in boys and birch; often an academical tyrant, who in his utter ignorance of proper management, renders his victims intractable by maltreatment, and then treats them worse for being intractable. Cudgel a little jackass as often as you will, and if he survives your cruelty, he will only end with being a great jackass. Many of our pedagogues, ever ready to ply the birch and the ferula, make no allowance for natural deficiency of talent, while they will often terrify a lad of good abilities, but weak nerves, into an asinine stupidity. The boys from whom they gather their harvest, they seem to consider as so much corn, which must be threshed and knocked about the ears before any grains of sense can be extracted; or perhaps they liken them to walnut trees, which shower down their fruit in return for being well beaten. “ The schoolmaster's joy is to flog,” says Swift; since when a hundred years have elapsed, and it still remains the favourite 'pastime of our pedagogues, who seem to think that boys, as well as syllabubs, are to be raised by flogging. Ships and fishes may make their way when steered by the tail; but when we attempt to guide or impel youngsters by a similar process, we only retard or turn them out of their right line. Flagellation, whether of pupils or of soldiers, invariably hardens and depraves those whom it seeks to reclaim. In nothing is a thorough reform so much wanted as in some of our old-fashioned seminaries and teachers.
An empty-headed youth once boasted that he had been to two of the most celebrated schools in England. Sir," said a bystander, “you remind me of the calf that sucked two
• Why, sir, he
“ And what was the consequence?" was a very great calf.”
SCOTCHMEN.—The inhabitants of every country except their own. “No wonder," says Dean Lockier,
“ that we meet with so many clever Scotchmen, for every man of that country, who has any sense, leaves it as fast as he can."
SCOTT,—Sir Walter.—Twenty-two bad poets have already written epitaphs upon this celebrated author. What a gain would it be to the world if Sir Walter were now writing theirs !
SHOOTING THE LONG-BOW.-Stretching a fact till you have made it as long as you want it. Lord Herbert of Cherbury's tastes have descended to some of our modern nobility, for he tells us in his Auto-biography, “The exercises I chiefly used, and most recommended to my posterity, were, riding the great horse and fencing. I do much approve likewise of shooting in the long-bow." So does our ingenious contemporary, Lord G-, who never suffers himself to be outstripped in the marvellous. The Marquis of H-had engaged the attention of a dinner party, by stating that he had caught a pike, the day before, which weighed nineteen pounds. “ Pooh!” cried Lord G-, “that is nothing to the salmon I hooked last week, which weighed fifty-six pounds." "Hang it," whispered the Marquis to his neighbour, “I wish I could catch my pike again; I would add ten pounds to him directly."
SICKNESS—without reference to the religious impressions it is calculated to awaken, is well worth enduring, now and then, not only for the pleasure of convalescence, but that we may learn a due and grateful sense of the blessing of health. · Every recovery,” says Jean Paul Richter, palingenesia, and bringing back of our youth, making us love the earth, and those that are on it, with a new love."
o is a
SIDE WIND ATTACK.-The not uncommon custom of pelting a friend, after he has left the company, seems to have been derived from the practice of the ancient tribes, who erected a monument to a departed hero, by throwing stones
SILENCE.-A thing which it is often difficult to keep, in exact proportion as it is dangerous not to keep it. So frail that we cannot even speak of it without breaking it, and yet as easily and as completely to be restored as it was destroyed, few people understand the use, or appreciate the value of this mysterious quality. All men when they talk, think that they are conferring pleasure upon others, because they feel it themselves; but none suspect that the same object may sometimes be more effectually obtained by their silence. A good listener is much more rare than a good talker, because the conversation of general society seldom fixes the attention, and thus in the hopelessness of curing the evil, we aggravate it. “When I go into company,” said L
66 I am compelled to become as great a chatterbox as the rest, because I had rather hear my own nonsense than that of other people.” " After all,” observed his niece one day, when he was twitting her with her loquacity," I know many men who talk more than women.”—" Ay,” was the reply, more to the point.”
- was once overturned in a carriage with his niece, who, finding after all her screams, that she had received no hurt, asked her uncle how, in such an imminent danger, he could have preserved so perfect a silence.
Because I was tolerably sure that death would not be frightened away by my making a noise."
Socrates, when a chatterbox applied to him to be taught rhetoric, said that he must pay double the usual price, because it would first be necessary to teach him to hold his tongue. We may be sometimes gainers by ractising this difficult art, even at a festive meeting. Silence," exclaimed an epicure
to some noisy guests, "you make so much noise that we don't know what we are eating."
SILK. -The refuse of a reptile, employed to give distinction and dignity to the lord of the creation. Compare the caterpillar in its coccoon, with the king's counsel in his silk gown, and in adjusting the claims of the rival worms, the palm of ingenuity must be conceded to the former, because it spins and fashions its own covering, whereas the latter can only spin out the thread of empty elocution, and weave a web of sophistry. The Abbé Raynal calls silk, “l'ouvrage de ce ver rampant, qui habille l'homme de feuilles d'arbres élaborées dans son sein.” Hear how the pompous Gibbon gives the same information. “I need not explain that silk is originally spun from the bowels of a caterpillar, and that it composes the golden tomb, whence a worm emerges in the form of a butterfly.” There is an Arabian proverb which conveys the same fact in a much more moral and poetical form. “ With patience and perseverance, the leaf of the mulberry tree becomes satin."
SLANDERER.-A person of whom the Greeks showed a due appreciation, when they made the word synonymous with devil. Slanderers are at all events economical, for they make a little scandal go a great way, and rarely open their mouths, except at the expense of other people. We must allow that they have good excuse for being defamatory, if it be their object to bring down others to their own level. It may be further urged in their extenuation, that they are driven to their trade by necessity; they filch the fair character of others, because they have none of their own; and with this advantage, that the stolen property can never be found upon them. There is a defence also for their covert and cowardly mode of attacking you, for how can you expect that backbiters should meet you face to face? Nay, they have even a valid plea for being so foul-mouthed, considering how often
they have been compelled to eat their own words. Hang them! let us do the fellows justice!
SLAVE-DRIVER.-A white brute employed to coerce and torture black men. Old Fuller calls Negroes, "images of God carved in ebony.” May we not say of their white task-masters, that they are images of the devil carved in ivory?
SNUFF.-Dirt thrust up the nostrils with a pig-like snort, as a sternutatory, which is not to be sneezed at. The moment he has thus defeated his own object, the snuffling snufftaker becomes the slave of a habit, which literally brings his nose to the grindstone; his Ormskirk has seized him as St. Dunstan did the devil, and if the red hot pincers could occasionally start up from the midst of the rappee, few persons would regret their embracing the proboscis of the offender. Lord Stanhope has very exactly calculated that in forty years, two entire years of the snuff-taker's life will be devoted to tickling his nose, and two more to the agreeable processes of blowing and wiping it, with other incidental circumstances. Well would it be if we bestowed half the time in making ourselves agreeable, that we waste in rendering ourselves offensive to our friends. Society takes its revenge by deciding, that no man would thrust dirt into his head, if he had got anything else in it.
SOCIETY.-If persons would never meet except when they have something to say, and if they would always separate when they have exhausted their pleasant or profitable topics, how delightful, but alas! how evanescent would be our social assemblages.
SOLDIER.-A man machine, so thoroughly deprived of its human portion, that at the breath of another man machine, it will blindly inflict or suffer destruction. Divested of his