Not To People Like Us: Hidden Abuse In Upscale MarriagesThis important book brings the ignored population of abused upper-income women to light, revealing for the first time the depth and severity of "upscale abuse" How is it possible for a highly educated woman with a career and resources of her own to stay in a marriage with an abusive husband? How can a man be considered a pillar of his community, run a successful business and regularly give his wife a black eye? That we can even ask these startling questions proves how convinced we are that domestic abuse is restricted to the lower classes. In "Not to People Like Us" psychotherapist Susan Weitzman dramatically challenges this assumption. It is the first book to explore a previously overlooked population of emotionally and physically battered wives-the upper-educated and upper-income women, who rarely report abuse and remain trapped by their own silence. Weitzman draws on an in-depth study to document the shocking nature and incidence of abuse among the wives of professors, physicians and CEOs-many of them professionals and executives themselves. With keen insight and profound sensitivity, she reveals the unique path taken by the upscale wife-the early warning signs, the dilemmas and decisions, the dangerous desire to cover up and maintain appearances. The first book to condemn the legal and social service system for failing to recognize domestic violence among upper-income families, "Not to People Like Us" offers crucial information to help women find their way out of abusive relationships and toward safety and independence. |
Contents
3 | |
This Doesnt Happen to People Like Us | 17 |
Why Do Women Stay in Abusive Marriages? | 37 |
He Was So Sexy So Powerful | 55 |
I Made My Bed | 79 |
Im Outta Here | 109 |
Arrogance and Insecurity Grandiosity | 131 |
What About the Children? | 159 |
Who Can Help? Therapeutic Interventions | 175 |
How Family Friends | 203 |
Life Goes On | 221 |
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Common terms and phrases
abused upscale abusive husband abusive marriage Allison American Psychological Association asked attorney Bailey battered wife battered wives Battered Woman Syndrome Battered Women become believe Bill borderline personality disorder child Coalition Against Domestic court danger Deborah Tucker divorce domestic abuse domestic violence Dutton emotional emotional abuse experience explained Family Violence fear feel felt friends going happen hotline Ibid Ingrid Irene isolation Julia Kathleen keep learned learned helplessness leave living Marc marital married mother narcissistic narcissistic personality disorder narrative never Newbury Park P.O. Box parents partner percent Phone physical abuse police problem professionals Psychoanalysis Psychological psychotherapy rage reported Rhonda Robert Sally self-esteem selfobject sense situation social spousal abuse spouse stay story talk tell therapist therapy thought told upscale abused wife upscale abused woman upscale batterer upscale violence upscale woman victim Wife Abuse witnessed wives Woman Abuse York