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For she will score your fault upon my pate. Methinks, your maw, like mine, should be your
clock, And strike you home without a messenger. Ant. S. Come, Dromio, come, these jests are out
of season; Reserve them till a merrier hour than this : Where is the gold I gave in charge to thee?
Dro. E. To me, sir? why you gave no gold to me. Ant. S. Come on, sir knaye, have done your
foolishness, And tell me, how thou hast dispos'd thy charge. Dro. E. My charge was but to fetch you from the
mart Home to your house, the Phenix, sir, to dinner; My mistress, and her sister, stay for you.
Ant. S. Now, as I am a christian, answer me, In what safe place you have bestow'd my money ; Or I shall break that merry sconce' of yours, That stands on tricks when I am undispos'd : Where is the thousand marks thou hadst of me? Dro. E. I have some marks of yours upon my
pate, Some of my mistress' marks upon my shoulders, But not a thousand marks between you both. If I should pay your worship those again, Perchance, you will not bear them patiently. Ant. S. Thy mistress' marks! what mistress, slave,
hast thou ? Dro. E. Your worship's wife, my mistress at the
She that doth fast, till you come home to dinner,
you home to dinner. Ant. S. What, wilt thou flout me thus unto my
face, Being forbid? There, take you that, sir knave. Dro. E. What mean you, sir? for God's sake,
hold your hands; Nay, an you will not, sir, I'll take my heels.
[Erit DROMIO, E. Ant. S. Upon my life, by some device or other, The villain is o'er-raught of all my money. They say, this town is full of cozenage; As, nimble jugglers, that deceive the eye, Dark-working sorcerers, that change the mind, Soul-killing witches, that deform the body; Disguised cheaters, prating mountebanks, And many
such like liberties of sin : If it prove so, I will be gone the sooner. I'll to the Centaur, to go seek this slave; I greatly fear, my money is not safe. [Exit,
SCENE I. A publick place.
Enter ADRIANA, and LUCIANA. Adr. Neither my husband, nor the slave return'd, That in such haste I sent to seek his master ! Sure, Luciana, it is two o'clock.
Luc. Perhaps, some merchant hath invited him, And from the mart he's somewhere gone to dinner,
Good sister, let us dine, and never fret :
Adr. Why should their liberty than ours be more?
will. Adr. There's none, but asses, will be bridled so.
Luc. Why, headstrong liberty is lash'd with woe. There's nothing, situate under heaven's eye, But hath his bound, in earth, in sea, in sky: The beasts, the fishes, and the winged fowls, Are their males' subject, and at their controls : Men, more divine, the masters of all these, Lords of the wide world, and wild watry seas, Indued with intellectual sense and souls, Of more pre-eminence than fish and fowls, Are masters to their females, and their lords: Then let your will attend on their accords.
Adr. This servitude makes you to keep unwed, Luc. Not this, but troubles of the marriage bed, Adr. But, were you wedded, you would bear some
But were we burden'd with like weight of pain,
Luc. Well, I will marry one day, but to try;-
Enter DROMIO of Ephesus.
Dro. E. Nay, he is at two hands with me, and that
my two ears can witness. Adr. Say, didst thou speak with him? know'st
thou his mind Dro. E. Ay, ay, he told his mind upon mine ear: Beshrew his hand, I scarce could understand it.
Luc. Spake he so doubtfully, thou couldst not feel his meaning?
Dro. E. Nay, he struck so plainly, I could too well feel his blows; and withal so doubtfully, that I could scarce understand them.3
Adr. But say, I pr’ythee, is he coming home? It seems, he hath great care to please his wife, · Dro. E. Why, mistress, sure my master is horn
mad. Adr. Horn-mad, thou villain ? Dro. E. I mean not cuckold-mad; but, sure, he's
stark mad: When I desir'd him to come home to dinner, He ask'd me for a thousand marks in gold :
si.e. Scarce stand under them.
'Tis dinner-time, quoth I; My gold, quoth he:
Luc. Quoth who?
master : I know, quoth he, no house, no wife, no mistress ;So that my errand, due unto my tongue, I thank him, I bear home upon my shoulders ; For, in conclusion, he did beat me there. Adr. Go back again, thou slave, and fetch him
home. Dro. E. Go back again, and be new beaten home? For God's sake, send some other messenger.
Adr. Back, slave, or I will break thy pate across. Dro. E. And he will bless that cross with other
beating : Between you I shall have a holy head. Adr. Hence, prating peasant; fetch thy master
home. Dro. E. Am I so round with you with
me, That like a football
me thus? You
spurn me hence, and he will spurn me hither: If I last in this service, you must case me in leather.
[Erit Luc. Fye, how impatience lowreth in your face.
Adr. His company must do his minions grace,