as often at me; and she did not tremble as she filled No. 216. Tea, till she came to the Circumstance of Armstrong's Wednes writing out a Piece of Tully for an Opera Tune: Then day, Nov. 7, she burst out she was exposed, she was deceived, she 1711, I was wronged and abused. The Tea-Cup was thrown in the Fire; and without taking Vengeance on her Spouse, she said of me, that I was a pretending Coxcomb, a Medler that knew not what it was to interpose in so nice an Affair as between a Man and his Wife, To which Mr. Freeman; Madam, Were I less fond of you than I am I should not have taken this Way of writing to the SPECTATOR, to inform a Woman whom God and Nature has placed under my Direction with what I request of her; but since you are so indiscreet as not to take the Hint which I gave you in that Paper, I must tell you, Madam, in so many Words, that you have for a long and tedious Space of Time acted a Part unsuitable to the Sense you ought to have of the Subordination in which you are placed. And I must acquaint you once for all, that the Fellow without, ha Tom! (here the Footman entered and answered Madam) Sirrah don't you know my Voice; look upon me when I speak to you; I say, Madam, this Fellow here is to know of me my self, whether I am at Leisure to see Company or not I am from this Hour Master of this House; and my Business in it, and every where else, is to behave my self in such a Manner as it shall be hereafter an Honour to you to bear my Name; and your Pride that you are the Delight, the Darling, and Ornament of a Man of Honour, useful and esteemed by his Friends; and I no longer one that has buried some Merit in the World, in Compliance to a froward Humour which has grown upon an agreeable Woman by his Indulgence, Mr. Freeman ended this with a Tenderness in his Aspect and a downcast Eye, which shew'd he was extremely moved at the Anguish he saw her in; for she sat swelling with Passion, and her Eyes firmly fixed on the Fire; $ when I fearing he would lose all again, took upon me to provoke her out of that amiable Sorrow she was in to fall upon me; upon which I said very seasonably for my Friend, that indeed Mr. Freeman was become the common No. 216. day, Nov. 7, 1711 common Talk of the Town; and that nothing was so Wednes much a Jest as when it was said in Company Mr. Freeman had promised to come to such a Place. Upon which the good Lady turned her Softness into down right Rage, and threw the scalding Tea-Kettle upon your humble Servant; flew into the Middle of the Room, and cried out she was the unfortunatest of all Women: Others kept Family Dissatisfactions for Hours of Privacy and Retirement: No Apology was to be made to her, no Expedient to be found, no previous Manner of breaking what was amiss in her; but all the World was to be acquainted with her Errours without the least Ad monition. Mr. Freeman was going to make a softening Speech, but I interposed. Look you, Madam, I have nothing to say to this Matter, but you ought to consider you are now past a Chicken; this Humour, which was well enough in a Girl, is unsufferable in one of your Motherly Character. With that she lost all Patience, and flew directly at her Husband's Periwig. I got her in my Arms, and defended my Friend: He making Signs at the same time that it was too much; I beckening, nodding, and frowning over her Shoulder that he was lost if he did not persist In this Manner she flew round and round the Room in a Moment, till the Lady I spoke of above and Servants entered, upon which she fell on a Couch as breathless. I still kept up my Friend; but he, with a very silly Air, bid them bring the Coach to the Door, and we went off, I forced to bid the Coachman drive on We were no sooner come to my Lodgings but all his Wife's Relations came to inquire after him; and Mrs. Freeman's Mother Writ a Note, wherein she thought never to have seen this Day, and so forth. In a Word, Sir, I am afraid we are upon a thing we have not Talents for; and I can observe already my Friend looks upon me rather as a Man that knows a Weakness of him that he is ashamed of, than one who has rescued him from Slavery, Mr. SPECTATOR, I am but a young Fellow, and if Mr. Freeman submits, I shall be looked upon as an Incendiary, and never get a Wife as long as I breathe. He has indeed sent Word home he shall lie at Hampstead to Night; but I believe Fear Fear of the first Onset after this Rupture has too great No. 216. a Place in this Resolution. Mrs. Freeman has a very Wednes day, - pretty Sister; suppose I delivered him up, and articled Nov. 7, with the Mother for her for bringing him home. If he 1711, has not Courage to stand it, (you are a great Casuist) is it such an ill thing to bring my self off as well as I can? What makes me doubt my Man, is, that I find he thinks it reasonable to expostulate at least with her, and Captain SENTREY will tell you, if you let your Orders be disputed you are no longer a Commander, I wish you could advise me how to get clear of this Business handsomely. T Yours, No. 217. Tom Meggot' Thursday, November 8. I -Tunc foemina simplex, Et pariter toto repetitus clamor ab antro.-Juv. Sat. 6. SHALL entertain my Reader to day with some Letters from my Correspondents. The first of them is the Description of a Club, whether real or imaginary I cannot determine; but am apt to fancy, that the Writer of it, whoever she is, has formed a kind of Nocturnal Orgie out of her own Fancy; whether this be so, or not, her Letter may conduce to the Amendment of that kind of Persons who are represented in it, and whose Characters are frequent enough in the World. 'Mr. SPECTATOR, In some of your first Papers you were pleased to give the Publick a very diverting Account of several Clubs and nocturnal Assemblies; but I am a Member of a Society which has wholly escaped your Notice: I mean a Club of She-Romps. We take each a Hackney Coach, and meet once a Week in a large upper Chamber, which we hire by the Year for that Purpose; our Landlord and his Family, who are quiet People, con stantly contriving to be abroad on our Club-night We are no sooner come together than we throw off all that 1711, No. 217, that Modesty and Reservedness with which our Sex Thursday, are obliged to disguise themselves in publick Places. Nov. 8, I am not able to express the Pleasure we enjoy from ten at Night till four in the Morning, in being as rude as you Men can be, for your Lives. As our Play runs high the Room is immediately filled with broken Fans, torn Petticoats, Lappets of Head-dresses, Flounces, Furbelows, Garters, and Working-Aprons. I had forgot to tell you at first, that besides the Coaches we come in our selves, there is one which stands always empty to carry off our dead Men, for so· ⚫ we call all those Fragments and Tatters with which the Room is strewed, and which we pack up together in Bundles, and put into the aforesaid Coach, It is no small Diversion for us to meet the next Night at some Member's Chamber, where every one is to pick out what belonged to her, from this confused Bundle of Silks, Stuffs, Laces, and Ribbands. I have hitherto given you an Account of our Diversion on Ordinary Club Nights; but must acquaint you farther, that once Month we Demolish a Prude, that is, we get some queer formal Creature in among us, and unrig her in an instant. Our last Month's Prude was so armed and fortified in Whale-bone and Buckram that we had much ado to come at her, but you would have died with laughing to have seen how the sober awkard Thing looked, when she was forced out of her Intrenchments. In short, Sir, 'tis impossible to give you a true Notion of our Sport, unless you would come one Night amongst us; and tho' it be directly against the Rules of our Society to admit a Male Visitant, we repose so much Confidence in your Silence and Taciturnity, that 'twas agreed by the whole Club, at our last Meeting, to give you Entrance for one Night as a Spectator, I am Your Humble Servant, Kitty Termagant. P. S. We shall Demolish a Prude next Thursday. present present find in my self any Inclination to venture my No. 217, Person with her and her romping Companions. I should Thursday, Nov, 8, regard my self as a second Clodius intruding on the 1711. Mysterious Rites of the Bona Dea, and should apprehend being Demolished as much as the Prude. The following Letter comes from a Gentleman, whose Taste I find is much too delicate to endure the least Advance towards Romping. I may perhaps hereafter improve upon the Hint he has given me, and make it the Subject of a whole Spectator; in the mean time take it as it follows in his own Words. 'Mr. SPECTATOR, She It is my Misfortune to be in Love with a young Creature who is daily committing Faults, which though they give me the utmost Uneasiness, I know not how to reprove her for, or even acquaint her with. is pretty, dresses well, is rich, and good-humoured; but either wholly neglects, or has no Notion of that which Polite People have agreed to distinguish by the Name of Delicacy. After our Return from a Walk the other Day, she threw her self into an Elbow Chair, and professed before a large Company, that she was all over in a Sweat. She told me this Afternoon that her Stomach aked, and was complaining yesterday at Dinner of something that stuck in her Teeth. I treated her with a Basket of Fruit last Summer, which she eat so very greedily, as almost made me resolve never to see her more. In short, Sir, I begin to tremble whenever I see her about to speak or move, As she does not want Sense, if she takes these Hints, I am happy. If not, I I am more than afraid, that these things which shock me even in the Behaviour of a Mistress, will appear insup portable in that of a Wife, I am, Sir. Yours, &c My next Letter comes from a Correspondent whom I cannot but very much value, upon the Account which she gives of herself. 'Mr. |