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When thus fitted out there is not a doubt

He'll escape all this laugh and this joke:
Knights, Ladies, and Mayors, and younger surveyors,
All know that he's pure heart of oak.

Tho' in this case he falter'd, the Case will be alter'd
When next to a ball he shall go..

In future, our trust is, he'll do himself Justice,
Nemo omnibus horis, we know.

Ina Don Cossack's dress, most splendid, we guess,
Gabriel Swainson was marching about;
His chin so well smeared with a capital beard,
That at first we could scarce find him out.

Henry Newsham's Cossack, with the belt at his back,
And other appointments so gay,

Were all quite correct, as we well might expect,
And in dancing he figur'd away.

If ever again we should fight the French-men,
We'll send these two heroes to brave 'em ;

With a cloud of Cossacks, such as these at their backs,
Lord help 'em! for nothing could save 'em.

Two knights most renowned, now appear'd on the
ground,

Clough and Parke as De Bauf and Sir Brian ; Tho' the best knights by far, they were not above Parr, The knight with the heart of a lion.

by some it was said, Henry Harrison's head
With the wig of old Syntax was grac'd:

hers, quite at a loss, called him Dr. Pangloss,
But neither quite clearly was trac'd.

He was neither array'd, nor preach'd he, nor pray'd
Like Syntax; and no one would guess
Although LL.D. he might readily be)
He could ever be A, double S.

Mr. Butler Clough was an excellent stuff
Of the order St. Francis, a Friar;
Tho' great was the trial, with much self-denial,
No wine did he ever require.

Friar Tuck, as reported, John Stavert supported,
With his staff, and his beads, and his cross;
Par vobiscum pronounced, as himself he announced,
Yet for something seem'd quite at a loss.

But when the Black Knight, with a keen appetite,
Had joined him; no longer prevented

he pasty to find, Mrs. Aspinall kind

Had to the Committee presented.

he eagerness such is, that both had their clutches
Soon in it; and quickly 'twas clear'd;

Ake the story they tell about Copmanhurst cell,
The venison soon disappear'd.

bree big little Boys made a terrible noise;
However it caus'd no disaster:

t was Crowder's delight to see (flying a kite)

Dick Massie beat Rathbone his Master.

lut talking of Boys, with their marbles and toys,

Just brings to our memory clear;

an Old Boy so famous, that who would not blame us To leave his description out here?

is cock-and-pinch'd hat, with his wig and cravat, And other things tedious to tell;

lis shoes with square toes, little buckles, silk hose, His fine old face all suited well.

By his coat of straight cut, and his walk without strut,
He performed the Old Boy to the life;

And what is yet wanted will quickly be granted,
A nice little conny old wife.

In constant good spirits, and all other merits,
Good-humoured, as all will agree;

The Father of Fancies and all these gay dances,
Richard Harrison here we may see.

Doctor Formby, well drill'd, the character fill'd
Of a very old Soldier, 'tis said;
But by Loftus defied, this old Soldier tried
To pick the eyes out of his head.

Loftus, thinking this cruel, had thoughts of a duel,
Which only more mischief foreboded:

e pitied poor Lof. for his pistol went off,
Without ever having been loaded.

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wore

This dress, it is said; which appears
(Compute it who can) to allow to each man
A hundred and eighty odd years.

On this, to be brief, which exceeds all belief,
The next writ of error will tell us,
Perhaps to divert us, that since Gislebertus,
The race have been long-winded fellows.
Now here let us rest, as for time we are press'd;
But should this excite any laughter,

It is possible when we have run through the men,
We may draw up the ladies hereafter.

TO M. W.

Ah, Mary! when thy sighs were given,
And thy fond prayers aspir'd to heaven,
To meet acceptance there;
For one who pledged his vow, that he,
Whate'er thy chequered lot might be,

That lot with thee would share ;

Inspiring hope, the glistening tear,
To me was rendered doubly dear,
And did my soul sustain,

As on thy gentle lips I prest
The kiss that soothed my ardent breast,
And eas'd my mental pain.

But now, alas! I find too true,
The cup of bliss dash'd from my view,
And joy to sorrow turn;
Though still remembrance loves t'enhance
The magic of thy pensive glance,
On wings of fancy borne.

St. James's-street, March 9, 1821.

RETROSPECTION.

When pensive Memory ling'ring strays,
Mid scenes where hope illusive smil'd,
And o'er the grave of other days
Sheds the sad drops of joy beguil'd,
With tearful eye, their morn she views,
As clust'ring roses gaily dawn;
Sees too, alas! that rosy hues

Are fleeting as the dawning morn.
And past their evenings flatt'ring dream,
That future hours in bliss array'd,
Gone as the meteor's fragile beam;
Delusive as a meteor's aid.

GULI.

For, see where Time, with icy hand,
Hath strewn each flow'ret Hope had wreath'd:
On Lethe's shore, oblivion's strand,
They lie, of every charm bereav'd.
Yet, though reflection wakes the sigh,

And mingling tears responsive flow,
Still dear on Memory's wing to fly,

And trace past scenes of joy or woe:

And feel the soft, the pensive charm,

That lights the Muse's sacred fire, When borne from earth on Fancy's arm, The rapt soul strikes the poet's lyre.

G, F.

Benefit of Health.

Adieu, dear Mary! for your loss I grieve,
Since you your native land so soon must leave;
The choicest blessings Heaven can bestow,
Ever attend you wheresoe'er you go.
That happiness which from fair virtue springs,
Which consciousness of inward merit brings,
May you possess and spotless innocence
Attend your steps, and be a sure defence
Against all evil, in thought, word, or look,
Or bait destructive of temptation's hook.
Be heaven-born truth companion of your way,
And gentle prudence all your actions sway:
Dear girl! that traveling through change of air,
Through God's assistance, and paternal care,
Restore your health, is my most ardent prayer.
When the tempestuous ocean first you cross,
May no rude wind or storm the vessel toss.
Let gentle zephyrs fan th'enlivening gale,
And Providence attend the swelling sail.
While thus the vessel gently cuts its way
Through the smooth waves, you'll with delight survey
(If neither fear nor sickness give you pain)

The various wonders of th'extensive main.
When you've lost sight of England, if you find
A sigh escape for those you've left behind;
If fixed your mind on absent friends should be,
Perhaps among the rest you'll think of me.
When safely landed on a distant shore,
And all alarming fears and dangers o'er,
May those dear relatives to whom you're bound,
In perfect health and happiness be found;
And may your meeting be with pleasure crowned.

Biographical Notices.

AN INGENIOUS MECHANIC.

We give insertion (rerbatim) to the following sketch, at the desire of a correspondent, whose account of H. HEATON we entirely believe, because we have beard the same description of his ingenu. ity from the most respeetable quarters,

RALPH HEATON.

"The person who invented and constructed the ovens, during the siege of Gibraltar, for heating the shells, resides at present in Birmingham; his name is Ralph Heaton. He has also invented a most curious machine for making of button shanks, of so complicated a nature that although he did not obtain a patent for it, and adinits every mechanic readily to see it, there is not one who could ever construct another. He sold one of them to Tomlinson, the great manufacturer, for two thousand pounds; and such is the quickness with which it performs its operations, and the ease with which it is conducted, that although the said Tomlinson manufact tures a considerable quantity of buttons, he is amply supplied with shanks by the numerous nobilty and gentlemen who visit his manufactory, most of whom spend a few minutes in working this ingenious piece of machinery.

"The said Ralph Heaton is also author of many other ingenious inventions, and has made many improvements on the structure of steam-engines, and has by his inventive faculty accumulated a consider able fortune."

Miscellanies.

PUNNING.

The following most extravagant and ludicrous effusion of the celebrated author of Gulliver's Travels is inserted in the Kaleidoscope at the request of a correspondent, rather than from any admiration of the composition itself: not that we have any violent aversion to a good pun; neither have we imbibed the notion, that "the man who will make a pun will pick a pocket ;" a dogma, which, by-the-bye, was fulminated by the sulky cynic Johnson, rather for the sake of the alliteration of the sentence than the truth of the position. It would be affectation in us to say, that we object to a good pun in its proper place; but we do presume to think, that puns ought to be used more sparingly than in the following grotesque specimen. Although a single quince may improve the flavour of the apple-tart, we would

little Tom, though not old, hath paid nature's toll, I do desire to give some advice to those that survive me: first, let gamesters consider, that death is hazard and passage upon the turn of a die: let lawyers consider, tis a hard case; and let punners consider, how hard it As for my Lord Lieutenant, the Earl of Mungomery, is to die jesting, when death is so hard in digesting. I am sure he be-Wales my misfortune, and it would move him to stand by, when the carpenter (while all my coffin. I will make a short affidavid, that if he makes friends grieve and make an odd splutter) nails up my my epitaph I will take it for a great honour; it is a plentiful subject. His Excellency may say, that the art of punning is dead with Tom. Tom has taken all puns away with him; omne tulit pun Tom. May his We never Herberd so good a governor before. Sure Excellency long live tenant to the Queen in Ireland! he Mun go merry home, that has made a kingdom so of my puns: now I do confess, that I have let many a happy. I hear my friends design to publish a collection pun go that did never pungo; therefore, the world must read the bad as well as the good: Virgil has long foretold it, punica mala leges. I have had several forebodings that I should soon die. I have of late been often at committee, where I sat o'er die in diem. I conversed and woe is me dull soul! not to consider they are but dead men's faces stamped over and over, by the living, which will shortly be my condition.

with his work, and observed, that he would not have had that trouble if the Turks had not burned the librar at Alexandria. Hayter answered, “I believe with our Gibbon, that this burning is a mere fable." The other and anı much inclined to think that this library was replied, "I am of the same opinion with Mr. Gibbon; burned by Alexander the Great.

THE SKELETON OF THE WRECK,

While Sir Michael Seymour was in the comman of the Amethyst frigate, and was cruising in th Bay of Biscay, the wreck of a merchant ship drow past. Her deck was just above water; her lover board; but there was a cubhouse on deck, which bad masts alone standing. Not a soul could be seen of the appearance of having been recently patched with old canvas and tarpawling, as if to afford shelter to some forlorn remnant of the crew. It blew at this time a strong gale; but Sir Michael, listening

not fall into the mistake of the little boy, who wished much with the usher of the black rod: I saw his medals only to the dictates of humanity, ordered the ship

to have the apple-tart made entirely of quinces.-Edit

Kal.

A LETTER ON THE DEATH OF TOM ASH,

A NOTORIOUS PUNSTER.

Written by Dr. Swift.

SIR,-Tom Ash died last night. It is conceived he was so much puffed up with my Lord Lieutenant's favour, that it struck him into a fever. I here send you his dying speech, as it was exactly taken by a friend in short-hand. It is somewhat long, and a little incoherent; but he was many hours of delivering it, and with several intervals. His friends were about the bed, and he spoke to them thus:

"Tell Sir Andrew Fountaine I ran clear to the bottom, and wish he may be a late a river where I am going. He used to brook my compliments: may his sand be long a running, not quick sand like mine. Bid him avoid poring upon monuments and books, which is in reality but running among rocks and shelves to stop his course. May his waters never be troubled with mud or gravel, nor stopped by any grinding-stone. May his friends be all true trouts, and his enemies laid as flat as flounders. I look upon him as the most fluent of his race, therefore let him not despond. I foresee his black rod will advance to a pike, and destroy all our ills.

grasp

to be put about, and sent off a boat with iestre-
there was any being still surviving whom the help
tions to board the wreck, and ascertain whether
of his fellow-man might save from the
death. The boat rowed towards the drifting mase;
and while struggling with the difficulty of getting
through a high-running sea close alongside, the
crew shouting all the time as loud as they could,
an object like in appearance to a bundle of clothes
was observed to roll out of the cubhouse against
the lee shrouds of the mast. With the end of s
boat-hook they managed to get hold of it, and
hauled it into the boat when it proved to be the
trunk of a man, bent head and knees together, and

so wasted away as scarce to be felt within the ample

clothes which had once fitted it in a state of life and strength.-The boat's crew hastened back to the Amethyst with this miserable remuant of mortality: and so small was it in bulk, that a lad of fourteen years of age was able with his own hands to t it into the ship. When placed on deck, it showed

"But I am going: my wind in lungs is turned to a winding sheet. The thoughts of a pall begin to "My friends,It is time for a man to look grave, apall me: life is but a vapour, car elle va pour la moindre when he has one foot there. I once had only a punnick cause.-Farewell! I have lived ad amicorum fastidifear of death, but of late I have pundered it more seri-um, and now behold how fast I di-um !” ously. Every fit of coughing hath put me in mind of my coffin; though dissolute men seidomest think of dissolution. This is a terrible alteration: I, that supported myself with good wine, must now be supported by a small bier. A fortune-teller once looked on my hand, and said, 'This man is to be a great traveler: he will soon be at the diet of Worms, and from thence go to Rot is bone'-but now I understand his double meaning. I desire to be privately buried, for I think a public funeral looks like Bury fair; and the rites of the dead too often prove wrong to the living: methinks the word itself best expresses the number, neither few nor all. A dying man should not think of obsequies, but ob se quies. Little did I think you would so soon see poor

Here his breath failed him, and he expired. must be pardoned in a dying man. There are some false spellings here and there, which for the first time, to the astonishment of all, siges

Tom stown under a tombstone. But as the mole crumbles

the mold about her, so a man of my small mold, before I am old, may molder away. Sometimes I've rav'd that I should revive; but physicians tell us, that when once the great artery has drawn the heart awry, we shall find the core die all, in spite of the highest cordial. Brother, you are fond of Daffy's elixir; but, when death comes, the world will see, that, in spite of Daffy, DOWN Dilly. Whatever doctors may design by their Medicine, a man in a dropsie, drops he not, in spite of Goddard's drops, though none are reckoned such high drops. I find death smells the blood of an English man: a fee faintly fumbled out, will be a weak defence against his fee fa fum. P T are no letters in death's alphabet; he has not half a bit of either: he moves his scythe, but will not be moved by all our sighs. Every thing ought to put us in mind of death: physicians affirm, that our very food breeds it in us; so that in our dieting we may be said to die eating. There is something ominous, not only in the names of diseases, as Diarrhæ, Diabetes, Dysentery, but even in the drugs designed to preserve our lives, as Diacodion, Diapente, Diascordium. I perceive Dr. Howard (and I feel how hard) lay thumb on my pulse, then puls it back, as if he saw Lethum in my face. I see as bad in his; for sure decease before the day cease: but before I die, before there is no physick like a sick phy. He thinks I shall the bell hath toll'd, and Tom Tollman is TOLD that

A nick-name of Ash's. + The Bishop of Clogher,

WHIMSICAL ORTHOGRAPHY.

of remaining life; it tried to move, and next » moment muttered in a hollow sepulchral tone. "there is another man." The instant these words were heard, Sir Michael ordered the boat to shore The following singular letter was lately sent to a re-off again for the wreck. The sca having now be spectable horse-doctor in this town:-Trawsfynyold, come somewhat smoother, they succeeded this te near Barmouth, Feb. 22, 1821. Dear Doitor-I have in boarding the wreck; and looking into the cab take this Pleasure of Inform you that my Legis rather house, they found two other human bodies, wasted better evry Day and almost quite well-and so I am like the one they had saved, to the very buses, but very much oblige to you, and very Glad that I meet without the least spark of life remaining. They with you, and I shall not forget you in my life-and I will give youar Carictor to evry body that is in my power were sitting in a shrunk up posture, a hand of one and I do say that I never see such good Doctor never resting on a tin pot, in which there was about a -and If any thing in my power to do to you I will with gill of water; and a hand of the other reaching to willing and easly make it-I do Geive my best respect the deck, as if to regain a bit of salt beef, of the to my Dear Doctor and to Miss and all youar good the size of a walnut, which had dropped from its famely-this from the Walce woman that you have nerveless grasp. Unfortunate men! they had starved Cuareed-youar Wellissher on their scanty store, till they had not strength re maining to lift the last morsel to their mouths! The boat's crew having completed their last mel the attentions of the ship's company engrossed by choly survey, returned on board, where they found their efforts to preserve the generous skeleton, whe seemed to have just life enough left to breathe the remembrance that there was still "another man

GWEN ELLIS.

pointments under the Population Act, the following
Amongst the numerous written applications for ap-

were handed in:

"Sir-I propos to tak the Censures of the Enhabytans of this City myself.

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"Sir-I offer myselve to take the senses of the people under the Act of Parliament."-Limerick Chron.

Anecdotes.

"

his companion in suffering, to be saved. Captai S. committed him to the special charge of the spr geon, who spared no means which humanity or skil could suggest, to achieve the noble object of creating anew, as it were, a fellow-creature, whom famine bad stripped of almost every living energy. For three weeks he scarcely ever left his patient, giving him When Mr. Hayter (then chaplain to the Prince of nourishment with his own hand every five or ten culanean MSS. he one day met at the shop of the cele-deck of the Amethyst; and, to the surprise of th Wales) was at Naples, to examine and copy the Her-minutes; and at the end of three weeks more, brated bookseller Terres (famous for his library and who recollected that he had been lifted nature of skeleton of the wreck" was seen walking on the great collection of prints) a Neapolitan, with many ship by a cabin boy, presented the stately figure of learned titles, who asked him how he was getting on a man nearly six feet high!

the

Fashions for April.

up on the board, in order that the worms, going | may move to any other square which the knight, at naturally up, may begin to make the silk ball, present in abeyance, may bear upon; in which case, PROMENADE-A high dress of cambric muslin; which being made (1 deem useless to mention it inust be absurd in him to have announced check. bottom of the skirt trimmed with a very deep flounce of what becomes of the worm, because the REARER work, above which is a fulness of thin jaconet muslin and my readers will be undoubtedly acquainted with let in in a broad wave, at the edge of which is a row of it) is kept about fifteen or twenty days, until the embroidery. High body, tight to the shape, without same worm, which has been all the time inside, collar, finished at the throat with a full trimming of makes a hole on the top of the ball, from whence it work. Plain long sleeve, terminated with a triple fall of work. Pelisse worn over this dress is composed of comes out in the shape of a butterfly. This lavender-coloured zephyrcene, lined with white sars-lives only four or five days; after which time it dies, net; the bottom of the skirt trimmed with two folds of leaving a great quantity of eggs, which are kept satin to correspond, each fold adorned with a silk cord for the next year. I suppose, that the Rearer of at the edge. The pelisse wraps a little to the right, fas-silk-worms is quite informed, not only of many obtened down with full bows of zephyreene, corded at theservations I have made in this solution, but likewise edges with satin. Plain tight body; waist rather long, of those that I think proper to omit, I will therefore and finished in middle of the back with a full bow and conclude it by assuring you that will feel myself ends of zephyreene High collar, very much sloped in front. Long sleeve is finished at the bottom with a ful-very happy, if they meet your approb: tin. 18th March, 1821. L. COLLOMELLUS. nes ef satin, above which are satin folds. Half sleeve uncommonly novel and pretty.

HEAD DRESS.-A bonnet of same material as pelisse, mixed with satin: of a moderate size; the zephyreene laid fall on the crown, the top of which is adorned with hells the brim is fluted, finished at the edge with satin anis, inte mixed with small bows; it is lined with pale ink zephyreene. A full plume of round ostrich feaers, Lavender and white, is placed to one side; a broad bon to correspond ties it under the chin. British lace il in imitation of Brussels. Half boots lavender loured kid, and Limerick gloves.

FULL DRESS. A round dress of English lace over a hite satin slip; bottom of the skirt trimmed with a lounce of lace, headed by a broad rouleau of white un, and surrounded by demi lozenges of lace, edged ath rouleaus of satin. Plain tight body, cut square and the bust; a full plaiting of net goes round; ree rows behind, only one in front; it is quilled, so a art stands up and shades the bosom. A broad white in sash is tied behind in short bows and long ends. The Leeve is composed of white lace over white satin; the ormer is disposei in demi-lozenges; there are two rows tranged in such a manner as to form a singularly pretty keve. The hind part is plaited, and brought round he crown of the head; and the front hair disposed ringlets, rather low at the sides, and much parted, as to display the forehead. Head dress, a pearl escent, over the forehead, but very far back, and a ry full plume of ostrich feathers on left side. Necke and ear-rings, pearls. White satin shoes, and fite kid gloves.

Natural history.

SILK WORMS.

lution to the Question of the Rearer of Silkworms, proposed in the Kaleidoscope, No. 39, P 312.

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TO THE EDITOR.

But there is, so far as concerns J. B. P.'s objection, a correct, and, if possible to J. B. P. a more conclusive mode of reasoning to be built on the one he has adopted, and which is, "If the white queen lose her power of giving check," or of moving so as to uncover check," because she is herself covering a check from the black bishop," then, the black queen's bishop's power loses its power of taking the knight, or of moving so as to uncover check, because it is itself covering check from the white queen: so that upon J. B. P.'s own showing, he could not prolong the game by playing the black queen's bishop's power. For, if the attack of the black bishop paralizes the white queen, the previous attack of the white queen, when moved to 6-3, must have paralized the black queen's bishop's power; playing the black bishop to 5-4 could in no way reinstate the power in the right it lost of moving, by the queen's attack at 6—3.

Warrington, 21st March, 1821.

THE YOUNG OBSERVER.

To the curious in natural history it will be interesting to learn, that four or five specimens of one of our rarest British fishes have been cast on shore this last year, at I shall be happy if my remarks offer any satisfacdifferent times, on the sand and rocks between Whit-tion to J. B. P. or any of your other amateurs of burn and South Shields. The fish is named by authors, chess. the Toothed Gilt Head. [Sparus Raji of Donovan. Sp. Niger of Turton.] It was first described by Mr. Ray, from a specimen cast on shore at the mouth of the Tees, in 1681; and for a century after is not known to have been again seen. Other specimens are, however, since then recorded. One singularity of the fish is learnt from these late specimens, which perhaps was not known before to any collector, viz. the exquisite quality of the food, both as to the flavour and firmness. It is a very flat fish, but compressed vertically, with a large eye. Our ingenious neighbour, Mr. Bewick, has made a correct drawing from one specimen, which probably will be published, if he should extend his works on natural history to the department of fishes. This specimen is in length 224 inches; breadth, 74; thickness, 2; weight, 44lbs.-Newcastle Courant.

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NO. II.

TO THE EDITOR.

"Si monumenta requiras, circumspice."

Epitaph.

SIR, The country has generally been considered the most eligible situation for a person of contemplative. habits. Philosophers and poets have expatiated on its advantages; and almost led the world to believe that a man can be neither virtuous nor wise but when immersed in its delightful solitude.

But surely the society and conversation of our fellow mortals need not eradicate those sentiments which do honour to our nature. The review of his army drew tears from the tyrant Xerxes: and does the sight of numbers render the citizen callous? or, does he feel less acutely or less tenderly than the peasant? No! Virtue is the growth of a social as well as a secluded life; and must not be confined within the pale of retirement.

Nor is it less in one's power to be serious than to be innocent in a town, which, to the thinking mind, will present alternate subjects for regret and joy, for gaiety and pensiveness.

SIR,-I have had many opportunities of seeing The eggs, alias seeds, of the silk-worms, the best players of chess in Paris-several very (as the interrogator, in all probability, is aware good ones in London, and I have never seen one al) smaller than the head of a pin. There are lowed, under any circumstances, to place his king Nay; it may be contended that a town life affords any ways of hatching them; and to prevent my in check; the obligation to do so, constituting a more forcible lessons on the instability of human affairs lution being too diffuse, I will mention only three. stale mate. In my opinion, neither the queen nor The first is, to put them in some cotton rolled in any other piece, until actually removed by the ad- than one spent in the country. "Nil enim quiescit." piece of rag; but in England I think this is not the versary's pieces, can lose their rights. On the cou-To-day differs from yesterday; and to-morrow may t method; the air is not warm enough. The se- trary, I have always seen, that a piece or pawn be still more different. Next week I may walk through nd (which, if I am not mistaken, is the best) is to covering check, may, at the same time, give check the streets I have just traversed and meet no one of the pose them to the sun, spread on a board. The to the adversary's king; and therefore it follows, crowd I have seen this morning; nay, ere then, such ird (which very few persous will like to execute, that the king cannot lay himself open to a check by is the rage for improvements, the very appearance of twithstanding that in Portugal it is the most use) the movement of a piece or a pawn, seeing, that, if the street may be so altered, that a stranger could with by rolling them in a rag, and keeping them for the piece or pawn had not intervened, "the king r some days under the arm-pit, until after a few would have been in check by the piece or pawn codifficulty recognise it. ays (there is no certain time) they produce very vering the previous check. Suppose, that, in the Whereas there seems to exist this distinction between all worms, which must, on the same day, be put course of the game, the black queen give the white the changes of the country and those of the town, a board, over some mulberry tops (which is the king check, and the white cover with a knight which that in the former, the same objects very frequently aly leaf they eat) that must be changed (whilst shall, at the same time, place the black king in recur; but, in the latter, seldom or never. In winte ey are so small) every three days. But having check, must the player, in this last instance, an- I see the trees of my favourite field stripped of their tained almost its full size (that is an inch nounce check or not? if he must, then one of two n) they require new leaves every day. Being things will happen; either the queen will take the foliage; the flowers are dead; the feathered songsters ir full size (that is an mch and a half long, l-knight, and possibly at the sacrifice of a superior mute. In spring I revisit it; the trees have regained le more or less) the REARER is to give himself the for an if rior piece, or the king must move; but their leaves, and afford me their wonted shade; I find rouble of puting a sprig of any tree, standing if J. B. P.'s objection avail (Kal, No. 32.) the king the primrose and the violet under their accustomed

hedge; the blackbird or the throstle repeats the notes to which I have so often listened; and nature wears her usual look. If I continue to visit it at either of these seasons, the face of things is again restored; and beauty and desolation reign by turns.

It is not so in town. There, a moralist (like Jacques) might find matter for a thousand similies from the shifting scene before him. To such an one, the too common notice "This house to be let," would speak as strongly as an escutcheon; the transient duration of all sublunary things be as much indicated by the flutter of the auctioneer's flag, as by the nodding plumes of the hearse; and, even in our busiest and most lively thoroughfares, he might point to every thing around him, and exclaim, "Si monumenta requiras, circumspice."

A word at parting with you, Mr. Editor. I have been told that you have known pretty well the misery which is inseparable from a bachelor's life: there is none to weep when we weep, nor to rejoice when we rejoice; and here I sit, with a poultice on my shin and a wounded heart: but a ray of hope gleams o'er my imagination when I think that the publishing of this letter may bring relief, "for heaven tempers the wind even to the shorn lamb ;" and why should it not do so to HENRY?

March 30, 1821.

P. S.-I have heard it said that nothing delights you so much as the sight of merry faces; I like heartily to see them myself. If you insert this letter, and the lady should consent to take me for better and for worse, you shall come to the wedding; and you shall have I purpose to resume this topic in a future paper; and, bride's cake enough to serve you for bread for the in the interim, remain

Your obedient servant,

PYRUS, P. S.-In my last No. page 1, for "fraternity" read « tribe."

TO THE EDITOR.

whole week.

POMPOUS LANGUAGE.

A person, who kept a ferry on the river Potamac, was fond of pompous language; and in common discourse used it to such a degree, that few people understood the meaning. A gentleman inquiring after his father's health, he answered as follows:

SIR, I am a disconsolate bachelor, much in want of "Sir, the intense frigidity of the circumambient ata helpmate and you will confer an obligation on me mosphere has so congealed the pellucid aqueous fluid by inserting this letter. Yesterday at noon, as the of the enormous river Potamac, that, with the most clock was striking twelve, I was passing St. James's eminent and superlative reluctance, I was constrained to procrastinate my premeditated egress into the palatine church, when my attention was riveted upon a young province of Maryland, for the medical, chemical, and lady passing on the other side of the street: I am sure, galonical coadjustancy and co-operation of a distinfrom the manner in which she blushed, that my no-guished sensitive son of Esculapius, until the peccant, deleterious matter of the arthritis had pervaded the cratice of her must have exceeded the limits of good nium, into which it had ascended and penetrated from breeding, but for this I was severely punished; for, in the inferior pedestrical major digit of my parental relacrossing the street, I ran against a watchman with a tive in consanguinity, whereby his morbosity was magwheelbarrow full of mud. My shins were broken nified so exorbitantly as to exhibit an absolute extinguishment of vivification." against the wheelbarrow; and part of the mud was upset upon me. I did not care a fig for this; but the wicked creature laughed at my misfortune, as if she was highly delighted. It was my intention to watch her to her dwelling, but this unfortunate encounter with the confounded wheelbarrow prevented me; and, as I am in expectation of leaving this neighbonrhood in a short time, I dare not trust to chance for an opportunity of becoming acquainted with her.

It is scarcely possible for any other fair one to think herself the object of my inquiry; but it may prevent mistakes if I give some description of her person. She is tall, and a handsome figure; she was dressed in a blue pelisse, trimmed with a plain, broad, velvet border; she wore a Leghorn bonnet, with a long poke, under which was a countenance, though not regularly handsome, yet it beamed with an expression and a witchery more captivating than beauty. It is unnecessary to give any description of myself; the adventure of the wheelbarrow and the unfortunate sufferer must be fresh in the lady's recollection. If her affections are not already engaged, it would be the object and pride of my life to make her happy, and to share my fortune with her, which, though not very large, is sufficient to support her in that elegant sphere of life in which she appears to move.

I hope and trust this letter will be interpreted in the manner in which I am anxious it should be. As a serious proposition to the lady in question, there are many explanations which a person so applied to would require, and which I shall readily give to any person duly authorised to receive them; but it would prevent a great deal of trouble if the lady would favour me with her address, or give me, otherwise, an opportunity of personally explaining myself to her. A line left at your office would be promptly attended to.

To Correspondents.

PLAGIARISTS.-We entirely approve of the suggestion
of HONESTUS, that whenever we detect a hoax si-
milar to those lately exposed in the Mercury and
Kaleidoscope, it would be a good plan to post up the
manuscript conspicuously in our office window, or in
some such public place, which might lead to a de-
tection, if not of the principal delinquent, at least of

some of his auxiliaries.

PLAGIARISMS.-We have now before us a letter al-
luded to last week, and to which we pledged ourselves
to reply, to the satisfaction of any reasonable person;
or to acknowledge that we ourselves merited the re-
proaches we have recently and so unceremoniously
cast upon certain detected plagiarists. Our correspon.
dent who makes his approaches under the specious
garb of FAIR PLAY, is, in all probability, some dis-
appointed poet, with whom it has been our misfortune
to differ, as to the pretensions of his muse. Be this

as it may, he appears to chuckle at the thought that
he has us on the hip," if we may judge by the
profusion of italics and other significant hints inter-
spersed throughout his letter. The sum of his charge
is briefly this: that, whilst we have been taxing others
with plagiarisms, we have ourselves been guilty of
foisting upon the public a narrative of the Siege of La.
thom House, as having been originally published in
the Kaleidoscope, although it had appeared previ-
ously in the European Magazine. Now, it is a
matter of little comparative consequence, whether the
interesting narrative in question had been previously
published or not; but it is of the utmost consequence
that good faith should be preserved, both in our pri-
vate and public transactions; and if, as FAIR PLAY

the unknown friend from whom we received our MS copy through the post, was equally unapprized of the fact; but believed, as he states in his letter, that his copy, transcribed from the original, was the first that had ever been consigned to the editor of any public journal. We received our copy post paid, under cover and seal, which we shall not describe, as our correspondent, in one of his notes marked 'private,' says, "If at any period of the communications, a curiosity should be excited to know who the collector of these fragments may be, I beg you will not lend yourself to its grati fication." If FAIR PLAY will turn to our 19th num ber he will find the note with which our corespondert prefaced the narrative, which he states "has never bee printed." In this it appears he was mistaken; ta• withstanding which we have not a doubt that our c was actually transcribed from the MS. in the Ashr lean library. For some reason which we could not divine, we were requested to suspend the appearance of the notes for some time, until we should hear aga from our correspondent, who has not yet favoured us with further instructions. We trust we have end enough upon the subject to clear ourselves from the slightest imputation of a wish to mislead the puber; but before we take leave of our correspondent, we beg to define the word PLAGIARIST, in order to prove that, even on his own showing, he has made out no case. A PLAGIARIST, in the general acceptation of the word, is one who steals or appropriates the ideas or language of another which he passes off as his own. Now, our correspondent, although he appears to have been in error in supposing his was the first copy from the original MS., did not attempt to palm himself is its AUTHOR; on the contrary, he styles himsel te "collector of these fragments." We shall y add, by way of apology for this protracted expl tion, that it is of consequence to us to repel y insinuation which may tend to diminish the confidence with which we have been uniformly honoured by our friends. If this note should attract the notice of X. L. D. we may perhaps hope to hear further from him on the subject.

mere

EPITAPHS.-We thank K-y for the pains he has take to copy out an epitaph, although it has very little p tension to novelty; and we take this occasion to ob serve, that we have a large stock of contributions in this department, of which we shall probably avail our selves on some future occasion.

Our very industrious friend has omitted to name the author of the Essay on Taste he has taken the pa to transcribe for our use.

The paper on the Facial Angle, together with the
trative engraving, shall be given in our next.
The length only of the Cantos to which we before ace

interferes with their insertion. We had some
of making a selection from them, when the fine on
the Fancy Ball interrupted our design.

The lines by the late Mrs. Robinson, with the pre
nary note of H. St. J-, shall appear in the Mera
as early as convenient, if our correspondent apres
of the transfer: if not, they shall await his orders
the office. They are not at all adapted to the toe
the Kaleidoscope.

We think we have already acknowledged several con

munications from IGNATO.

The unexpected appearance of Lord Byron's Letter, which we were not aware until a few days since, obliged us to defer some communications intended this day's publication. They shall, however, be jected to as little delay as possible. Amongst the fri with whom we have made free, on this occasion, AMICUS--T-1-M.-H.-AN ANTIQUARYMANCHESTER SUBSCRIBER-TOMMY TURTON— T. R.-AN ASTRONOMER-E. F.-M. B. of M cheter-Z.-and W. S. H.-and several others pr ously acknowledged.

probably believes, we had copied from the European Printed, published, and sold by E. SMITH and (

Magazine, and at the same time professed to follow
an original manuscript, we should have been guilty of
LYING (for that detestable propensity ought always
to be called by its proper name.) The fact, however,
is, that we were not aware that this document had
ever appeared in print; and we feel convinced, that

54, Lord-street, Liverpool Sold also by J. Bywater and Co. Pool-lane; Evans, Ch win & Hall, Castle-st.; T. Smith, Paradise-st.; T.W brick, Public Library, Lime-st.; E. Willan, Beld-6: and J. Smith, St. James's-road, for ready money and

OR,

Literary and Scientific Mirror.

"UTILE DULCI."

This familiar Miscellany, from which religious and political matters are excluded, contains a variety of original and selected Articles; comprehending Literature, Criticism, Men and Manners, Amusement, Elegant Extracts, Poetry, Anecdotes, Biography, Meteorology, the Drama, Arts and Sciences, Wit and Satire, Natural History, Monthly Diary, Fashions, &c. &c.; forming a handsome Annual Volume, with an Index and Title-page-Regular supplies are forwarded to the following

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Biographical Notices.

BRIEF MEMOIR

OF THE

LATE DR. JAMES GREGORY,

OF EDINBURGH.

It is seldom our lot to record the death £ sa individual so universally esteemed, or those loss will occasion so irreparable a lank both in the academical celebrity of ais city, and the national distinction of the untry. He has long been at the head th of the medical school and the Medical actice of Edinburgh, and to his great lents and distinguished character much, t only of the eminence of the University, t also of the prosperity of the city, is to ascribed. For above 30 years he has nually taught the medical students of the iversity the most important part of their ofessional duties; and an admiration for abilities, and reverence for his character, ve, in consequence, extended not only as as the English language is spoken, but far as the light of civilization has spread the world. Perhaps there is no scientific in now in existence whose name is so iversally revered, or whose instructions ve diffused over so wide a sphere the ans of relieving human distress.

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talent may be combined with the elegance of English accomplishments.

singular felicity of classical language with
which it was written. In the year 1790 he
was appointed, in consequence of the death He was one of the last of that illustrious
of Dr. Cullen, to the chair of the Practice body of literary and scientific men, whose
of Physic, the most important medical pro- labours gave distinction to their country
fessorship in the University and, for 32 during the latter part of the last century;
years, he sustained and increased the cele- and among the names of his intimate friends
brity which the eminence of his predecessor may be ranked those of almost all his con-
had conferred upon the office. During this temporaries, who will be remembered in
long period, the fame which his talents had future ages as men of science or learning ;
acquired had attracted students from all of Cullen and Black, of Reid, and Smith,
parts of the world to this city, all of whom and Stewart; and we will venture to say,
returned to their homes with a feeling of that the spot where his remains now lie in-
reverence for his character, more nearly terred, beside those of Adam Smith, will
resembling that which the disciples of an-long be visited by the admirers of Scottish
tiquity felt for their instructors than any genius, as fitted to awaken no common re-
thing which is generally experienced in the collections.
present situation of society.

a

Great, however, as was his reputation as Of the estimation in which his scientific a Professor, and as a man of science and merits were held throughout Europe, it is a literature, it was yet inferior to that which sufficient proof, that he is one of the few his character had acquired among his perof our countrymen who have been honoured sonal friends. Descended by the father's with a seat in the Institute of France; aside from a long and memorable line of andistinction which is only conferred upon cestors, among whom the friend and convery small and select number of foreigners. temporary of Newton is numbered; and As a literary man he has long enjoyed a by the mother's from one of the most very high reputation. His acute and dis- ancient noble families of Scotland, his chacriminating mind was early devoted to the racter was early formed on an elevated study of Metaphysics; and in the Literary model, and throughout his whole life he and Philosophical Essays, which he pub-combined, in a degree seldom equaled, the lished in the year 1792, is to be found one studies and acquirements of a man of sciof the most original and forcible refutations ence, with the taste and honourable feelHe was appointed in the year 1776, at of the dangerous doctrine of Necessity, ings of a high-born gentleman. While e early age of 23, to the professorship of which has ever appeared. To his reputa- his name, in consequence, was respected e Theory of Physic, and he continued to tion as an accomplished scholar all the well-throughout Europe, his society was sought eh this class, with great distinction, for informed persons in both parts of the island after by the first persons of rank and emiyears. As a text-book for his lectures, published, in the year 1782, his ConspecMedicine Theoretica, which soon beme a work of standard reputation over Europe, not only in consequence of the

can bear testimony; he was one of the few nence in the country; and, like his lamented men who have rescued this country from friend Mr. Playfair, he maintained, in no the imputation of a deficiency in classical ordinary degree, the important communitaste, which is thrown upon it with too much cation between the aristocracy of rank and justice by our southern neighbours, and he of talent. The brilliancy of his wit, and ientific merige which it possessed, but the demonstrated, that the vigour of Scottish the epigrammatic force of his conversation,

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