Bianca. What will you wear then, my lord? Biliofo. Velvet too! marry, it fhall be embroider'd; because I'll differ from the fool fomewhat. I am horribly troubled with the gout; nothing grieves me, but that my doctor hath forbidden me wine, and you know your ambaffador muft drink. Didit thou ask thy doctor what was good for the gout? Bianca. Yes; he said, ease, wine, and women, were good for it. Bilicfo. Nay, thou haft fuch a wit; what was good to cure it, faid he? Bianca. 54 Why, the rack, All your empiricks could never do the like cure upon the gout the rack did in England, or your Scotch boot. The French harlequin will instruct you. Biliofo. Surely I do wonder, how thou, having for the most part of thy life-time been a country body, should'st have so good a wit. Bianca. Who, I? why, I have been a courtier thrice two months. Biliofo. So have I this twenty years, and yet there was a gentlemanufher call'd me coxcomb t'other day, and to my face too: was't not a back-biting ratcal? I would I were better travelled, that I might have been better acquainted with the fafhions of feveral countrymen: but my fecretary, I think, he hath sufficiently inftructed me. 54 your Scotch boot] The torturing-boots are mentioned by Swift, vol. xiii. 1768, p. 314, to have been hung out in terrorem to Captain Creichton in 1689. N. 66 The boot was an inftrument of torture formerly ufed in Scotland. Bishop Burnet, in his Hiftory of his own Times, vol. I. p. 332. edit. 1754, mentions one Maccail, a preacher, who, being fufpected of treafonable practices, underwent this punishment in 1666: “-- he was put to the torture, which in Scotland they call the boots; for they put a pair of "iron boots clofe on the leg, and drive wedges between thefe and the "leg. The common torture was only to drive thefe in the calf of the leg but I have been told they were fometimes driven upon the thin "bone." 66 Biliejo. Biliofo. Marry, my good lord, quoth he, your lordship shall ever find amongst an hundred Frenchmen forty hot fhots; amongst an hundred Spaniards, threefcore braggarts; amongst an hundred Dutchmen, fourfcore drunkards; amongst an hundred Englishmen, fourfcore and ten madmen; and amongst an hundred Welchmen But fince you go about a fad embassy, I would have you go in black, my lord. Biliofo. Why, do'ft think I cannot mourn, unless I wear my hat in cypress like an alderman's heir? that's vile, very old, in faith. Bianca. I'll learn of you fhortly; O we should have a fine gallant of you, fhould not I inftruct you: how will you bear yourself when you come into the duke of Florence's court? Biliofo. Proud enough, and 'twill do well enough; as I walk up and down the chamber, I'll fpit frowns about me, have a strong perfume in my jerkin, let my beard grow to make me look terrible, falute no man beneath the fourth button, and 'twill do excellent. Bianca. But there is a very beautiful lady there, how will you entertain her? Biliofo. I'll tell you that, when the lady hath entertain'd me; but to fatisfy thee, here comes the fool: fool, thou shalt ftand for the fair lady. Enter Paffarello. Pafarello. Your fool will stand for your lady moft willingly and most uprightly. I'll falute her in Latin. Biliofo. Paffarello. Why then if your lady take down your fool, your fool will ftand no longer for your lady. Biliofo. A peftilent fool: 'fore God I think the world be turn'd upfide down too. Paffarello. O no, fir; for then your lady and all the ladies in the palace fhould go with their heels upward, and that were a ftrange fight you know. Biliofo. There be many that will repine at my preferment. Paffarello. aye, like the envy of an elder fifter, that hath her younger made a lady before her. Bilicfo. The duke is wond'rous discontented. Paffarello. Aye, and more melancholy-like than a ufurer having all his money out at the death of a prince. Biliojo. Didft thou fee madam Floria to-day? Paffarello. Yes, I found her repairing her face to-day; the red upon the white fhewed as it her cheeks fhould have been ferved in for two dishes of barberries in stew'd broth, and the flesh to them a woodcock. Biliofo. A bitter fool! Come, madam, this night thou shalt enjoy me freely, and to-morrow for Florence. Paffarello. What a natural fool is he that would be a pair of boddice to a woman's petticoat, to be truis'd and pointed to them? Well, I'll dog my lord, and the word is proper: for when I fawn upon him he feeds me; when I inap him by the fingers, he fpits in my mouth. If a dog's death were not ftrangling, I had had rather be one than a ferving-man: for the corruption of coin is either the generation of a ufurer, or a lousy beggar. [Exeunt Bianca and Paffarello. ACTUS III. SCENA II. Enter Malevole in fome freeze gown, while Biliofo reads his ICANNOT patent. Malevole, CANNOT fleep, my eyes ill-neighbouring lids The ftooping fcythe-man, that doth 55 barb the field, Repines and quarrels: alas, he's goodman tell-clock, Biliojo. Malevole! Malevole. Elder of Ifrael, thou honeft defect of wicked nature and obftinate ignorance, when did thy wife let thee lie with her? Bilinfo. I am going ambaffador to Florence. Malevole. Ambaffador! Now for thy country's honour, pr'ythee do not put up mutton and porridge in thy cloak-bag. Thy young lady wife goes to Florence with thee too, does the not? $5 barb the field i. e. mow it. See Note on Coriolanus, A, edit. 1773. S. At the palace! Now difcretion fhield man; for God's love let's ha' no more cuckolds! Hymen begins to put off his faffron robe; keep thy wife in the state of grace. Heart-atruth, I would fooner leave my lady fingled in a Bordello, than in the Genoa palace; fin there appearing in her fluttish shape Would foon grow loathfome, even to blushes fenfe, Make the foul scent the rotten breath of luft. When in an Italian lafcivious palace, a lady guardianlefs, The strongest incitements to immodesty, To have her bound incenfed with wanton fweets, O Ithacan! the chafteit Penelope cannot hold out, |