FINDING that no amount of patience, perseverance, long-suffering, or forbearance, no incitement by examples, no representation of the pleasures of knowledge, could induce my pupils to make a single effort to walk in its flowery paths, and experience the advantages cultivation could bestow, I resolved to give up the attempt. It was a labor which had no reward, and sooner or later it must be evident that there were no fruits, which must be owing to the incapacity of her who taught, or of those who pretended to learn. But how was it possible to tell parents that their children were incapable of learning; or, being too vicious or too indolent for application, were equally beyond the reach of human effort? If there had been any harmony between those who guided the household, there might have been some hope; but the severity of one led to the injudicious leniency of the other, and faults which would prove their destruction if permitted to go unchecked, were studiously concealed to save them from the effects of unbridled passion of the other. The one set an undue value upon acquirements which the other looked upon as useless; and while one was enjoining upon them diligence, and offering every aid and reward to incite them to earnest effort, the other was sneering at learning and the learned, and lending her influence and the practice of every art to free them from restraint and preserve them from the consequences of disobedience. How could there be any hope of reconciling such jarring elements? - and equally impossible would it be for an honest mind to remain in a position which imposed dissimulation and involved false pretences.

Beside this, as great as was the appreciation Monsieur had of knowledge, it was not less so of all that was good for the nourishing of the body, and the preparation of which was Madam's great aversion. She wished, therefore, that whoever initiated the children into the myste

ries of knowledge, should, when not thus employed, devote her time to initiating servants into the mysteries of cooking, doing up sweetmeats, seeing to wardrobes, and similar trifling labors that were necessary to the keeping of the head of the family in good-humor, and which she had neither the taste nor knack of doing. Knowing how useful those are often expected to make themselves who are treated like one of the family in such positions, it had been one of the stipulations in my contract, that the school-room was to be my only scene of labor. But though well understood, it was not the less a disappointment to Madam, on whom were heaped all the reproaches when things were not done. There were plenty of servants, but Monsieur insisted that English matrons carried the keys of their several larders and laundries at their girdles, and silver and china should on no occasion be trusted to menials; but he did not seem to realize the difference between the duties of her who has domestics who are part of the household, attached and faithful, and the inefficient, ignorant, unreliable help, changed every month, which constitutes the corps which an American woman must marshal into service and drill to order. He did not realize either the infinite difference between a woman who has all her life been accustomed to an establishment where the 'go and he goeth, and come and he cometh' there are none to dispute, and her who has been accustomed to the humble requirements of poverty, and not till age has subdued her enthusiasm, and sickness paralyzed her limbs, is called upon to assume the direction and superintend the appointments of a palace. I pitied her but could not help her. I began to lose my zeal for doing good, and to think the world might as well wag its own way. My labors had in them no pleasure because I accomplished nothing; yet I had received benefit, because I had been diverted from one course of thought to another. Misery loves company,' and however miserable one may be, I had found that there was no danger of being alone in it, and there is an endless variety. I had seen abundant evidence to convince me that fortune or misfortune might have placed me in a condition to me more unendurable than any I had experienced. The suffering caused by the separation and absence of those we love is not so great as that caused by the presence of those we hate; and quite impossible it seems to be, for two persons who love each other in youth, to be at all certain that a few years will not find them so dissimilar, developed by circumstances, that hatred takes the place of love. I could now pray fervently: ' May GOD tear every object of affection from my heart, rather than permit me to become the life-companion of one from whom my soul shrinks.'

6

In my daily walks I had met almost every day a poorly-clad, delicate, melancholy creature, whom the children called Crazy Nell, and at whose name all sneered as at something it was contamination to behold. I had asked her history, but could learn nothing but that she had been a woman of bad reputation, and was now partially if not wholly deranged. She lived in a little hut, if the shelter she had made for herself deserved even this dignified appellation, which nestled beneath a huge rock and over-hanging tree, half-a-mile from any house, at the foot of a little hill. There was only one room, a cot, aud a few of the simplest

utensils required to prepare food for human beings. The materials for her repasts she begged, never allowing herself the luxury of a meal at the tables of her benefactors, and never asking any thing better than the crumbs which fell from rich men's tables, and which were usually not so good as those they threw to their dogs. She was harmless, so that even little children did not run at her coming, but stopped to listen to her murmurings, which were incessant, whether she sat alone in her cell or hurried through the streets, seemingly indifferent to all whom she met or who passed her on the way. Her figure was slight, and there were still upon her features traces of a beauty which it was not difficult to imagine had caused her ruin.

We had noticed that every day, whatever the state of the weather, and however long her walk of necessity, she did not return without prolonging it by turning aside from the common street, and pursuing a winding path, that as far as our eye could see, led only to a solitary wild, and from which she always came back with more hurried step, and wild gesticulations that indicated a spirit in no wise calmed by what she had seen or heard. Curiosity led us to follow her one day, and learn what could be the one only object of interest to a being so forlorn. We saw it, but to us it indicated nothing, being a large white house, evidently the residence of a gentleman of fortune, and whom, on inquiry, we found to be a respected magistrate, holding honorable office under government. Nell did not enter the dwelling, but first walked around it, and then seating herself beneath an arched window, leaned her elbows upon her knees, and her face upon her hands in moody silence for an hour. The caprices of those whom reason has deserted need not surprise, but one could scarcely help the supposition that there must be a cause beside madness for so methodical a caprice as this. Of an old lady, who was neither peasant, serf, nor servant, at whose cottage we often rested and drank a glass of milk, we learned the secret. Poor Nell was not so crazed that wrong was effaced from her memory, or revenge from her settled purposes.

'Poor Nell!' said the old lady, her story is like hundreds of others, except perhaps that insanity saved her from sinking into the depths of vice and degradation. She was once betrothed to the worthy magistrate who flourishes unrebuked in yonder villa. He cruelly betrayed the trust she reposed in him, and deserted her. They then lived in a distant part of the country, which he immediately left, hoping to be free from the danger of meeting her. But she traced his steps, after wandering in bewilderment several years; and when she found him, the law and a solemn ceremony had pronounced another his wife, and both were equally honored and respected, notwithstanding his crimes. She was at first wild with rage, but still possessed of sufficient reason to understand that the only alternative for her was submission, and to make an effort to subdue her anger. For years she has been as you see her, but the daily visit which you noticed has never been omitted, and had for its first object to humble her whom she considered the usurper of her rightful position.

'But the lawful wife is a woman who has no sympathies for the wrongs of woman, and feels only contempt for those who are wronged.

She knew the story, and had not the less respect for her husband, and would have married him all the same had there been a hundred to surround her dwelling with the wailings of despair. Nell was mistaken in thinking her miseries would add a bitter drop to the cup of her rival, for she had not the sensibility to suffer from wounded pride. She at first exclaimed, in her proud rectitude, that the vile creature ought to be sent to the hospital or the work-house, and not be allowed to offend the presence of virtuous wives and daughters:' but the story had become old, and she had become accustomed to her strange freaks, so that now she sometimes sends her bread, of which the poor creature knows not the source; otherwise she would trample it under her feet. This is the way of the world,' said my friend. It is eighteen hundred years since CHRIST came into the world to set a perfect example to men, and though one of His most conspicuous deeds of mercy was to parden and bless a Magdalen, there has not been a single instance yet in which this example has been followed in the true spirit of HIM who said: Neither do I condemn thee, go and sin no more.' It was HE, too, who went among mechanics and fishermen, and chose for his companions the humble dwellers in cottages, and for the objects of his compassion those who were afflicted with leprosy and blindness, and all manner of diseases, and who said, When you make a feast, go out into the highways and hedges and bring in the poor, the halt, and the lame; but who of all those who profess to be His disciples, give feasts, and clothe themselves in purple and fine linen, ever deemed it their duty to go and do likewise? It is a strange world, and will never get righted in my day.'

I was learning that it was a strange world. Some new phase was developed every day, but I was not permitted to learn in this sphere any longer, and I was not compelled to the necessity of making known the resolution I had formed, or definitely stating the useless nature of my labors. I was suddenly stupefied by the announcement that my father was at the point of death. A paralysis, or some affection of the heart, had in an instant deprived him of the power of motion and the knowledge of what was passing about him. I was encouraged to hope if I came immediately I might find him alive, but his days were numbered. Without stopping for an hour's rest in travelling a day and two nights, I reached home and found myself at the bed of death. No sign of life returned after the first moment of prostration, and only a slight pulsation indicated the presence of the spirit till it took its flight a few moments before I arrived. What would I not have given for one word from those pale, cold lips—one look from those glazed and colorless eyes. That they had scarcely ever looked upon me but in sternness was now forgotten, and I pressed my lips to the icy brow, upon which the hot tears fell and rolled off as from a marble statue. I had never seen that form even in the repose of sleep. What a transition! I had seen him last in the vigor and stature of health, and now cold and lifeless in shroud and winding-sheet. It seemed like a terrible dream, and I moved about scarcely less cold and dead myself. Then followed the coffin and the solemn train, accompanied by the pomp and parade which custom bids attend on grief, and I was again alone with the past and its weight of woes, the present and its poignant suffering, and

the future more dark and fearful in its void, like a chasm over which one must walk without seeing a foot-hold or distinguishing its boundary. When pecuniary matters became the subject of investigation, there was revealed a fearful tale of speculations and losses, and death had probably been caused by sudden reverses and fear of approaching ruin. Man's disappointments are different from those of woman, and often more fatal, for his stern nature does not bend to the blow, but breaks. We cannot say we consider this a misfortune.

My own little fund was safe, though I had never till then known where it was deposited. The quarterly payment had never failed to reach me on the very day and hour it was due, and this was all which it was necessary for me to know. Not a single form of business had ever been taught me, but this I could easily learn, and I had enough to enable me to live, with the economy which had been the most thorough lesson of my life, and therefore would not now become a new affliction. At present I could not form plans, and the good old lady who fulfilled her promise of giving me no care, seemed scarcely to regret an event that compelled me to become her companion.

We soon settled quietly into our old ways with this important difference, that I was now sole arbitrator. The cottage, the garden, and green hill-side were mine to till and adorn, and though put in possession of it by a sad calamity, I could not help feeling, how sweet is liberty! But it did not overcome the other longing of planning and executing. I still found myself unable to be content with the life of the lilies of the field, which take no thought for the morrow. To eat, and drink, and clothes for the body, are called the absolute wants of nature, but there is another not less absolute in all natures richly endowed with vitality, and this is activity. I had more than ever before food for reflection, for had seen the world, and from my description of it, Aunt Ida was sure I ought never to want to see any more. How could any body ever want to live among such wicked folks?'

Alas! I did not dare to reveal to her my psychological state, for she would have concluded I had taken unto myself seven devils worse than the first,' and consequently resolve to flee from my presence.

The neighbors wondered I had not picked up some body' in my wanderings who was willing to take me for better or for worse; that so likely and capable a girl had not got married before now, was really a mystery; only that she was remarkably plain, and now that she was getting along in years, it was n't likely she ever would. One old lady had heern tell that she had been kind o' disappointed,' and another had been told that she had wanted some body once that she could n't get, and all in solemn conclave had wondered how any woman could be guilty of such a thing; for their parts, they thought girls better wait till they're asked. I had plenty of documentary evidence to prove that this had been my policy decidedly, and that all their guessing and conjecturing were not at all to the point, but did not choose to avail myself of my abundant means of defence, for I should thereby have deprived them of a great source of entertainment, and had there not been another sufficiently conspicuous to interest their benevolence and enlist their sympathies in behalf of her happiness for life, there would have been an