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A ferious difpofition and a relish of pleasure, are reckoned opposite to ose another by the generality of fools; who have not reflection enough to obferve that the extafies of pleasure are of all things the most serious. This all fenfible women know. The fools of the fex, who are fometimes as voluptuous as their betters, seem often to be out of this fecret. But pray who is fo grave, or fhews fuch a folemn front, as the hufband of the herd? The wether is an infipid whiffling fellow to the ram; whose dignified gravity abates, and becomes lefs diftinguishable, as foon as the genial season is over. And I have been told by fome ladies of very good fenfe and confiderable experience, that the grave rake is the man."

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SENTENCES, MAXIMS, AND REVERIES.

T HERE are many degrees of mad

nefs on this fide of Bedlam. Thofe too that ftop fhort of it, are by far the most dangerous kinds of insanity; and it would be much happier for the public, as well as for many individuals, if fome people were a little madder than they appear to be.

Molt oddities, I apprehend, Lave a twang of madnels in them; though they are often the excefs of fome good quality.

In education, it is perhaps proper and neceffary for young people to be pushed on to many hard and disagree

able things; efpecially as they are so often unavoidable in life. Had it depended upon one's own choice, who would have dared to have been born? Good God to be received into the world by a frightful old woman of either fex! Hercules himself would have avoided it if he could.

What does a confcience void of all great offences fignify to one who torments himself for every little mifbe haviour, every inattention, of which, abfence, hurry, or a hypochondriacal fit of diffidence, may have made him guilty? For one trifling neglect in point

of

of good manners, may give more pain of mind to a man of much fenfibility, than all the horrible crimes of a molt flagitious life ever gave to fuch a profligate wretch as Cæfar Borgia; whom I take to be the greatest of all modern villains. For the prefent are still out of the question.

Catiline was but half a villain-He ftrikes you only with horror. The compleat villain affects you at the fame time with horror and contempt.

I forget whether it is a reflection of Machiavel's or fome other political writer, that the state or empire must go to ruin in a great hurry, whofe affairs are conducted by fuch people as in low life must have belonged to a gang of thieves, or made perhaps fome figure amongst the banditti.

as fine as a horse. Just as if an aukward, clumfey, dancing bear, should be fmit with the ambition of shining at the Ridotto.

As there are not perhaps, even in this fenfible age, above three or four infallible men in all England; and one of them is fometimes inacceffible from cruel fits of the asthma, and some nasty fcorbutick complaints: I should think it b.ft, in all doubtful critical decifive' fituations, to confult the greatest fool of your acquaintance. And if he advifes a voyage to the East Indies, be fure to throw yourself into the first ship' that is to fail for Jamaica. I am told that fome of the antients used to pay a religious veneration to a certain kind of people; and they must have had fome

reason for it.

It would be a capital joke to observe' how clever and fenfible a fool thinks" himself; if it was not fo very common a fight as it happens to be.

The characters that hiftorians give of fome eminent perfons are not always quite juft. Caligula, for inftance, has been reprefented by most of them as a ́ monster of cruelty. For my part, I When there is the leaft time for decannot help confidering him as the beft liberation, one should never do any thing of emperors; and have always admired in a hurry. A friend of mine, who the humanity of his wifh, that the mob does not want for a reasonable share of of Rome had but one neck, and himself pride, told me fome days ago, that he' a good sharp ax to let drop upon it. A fhould never forgive himself for having tyrant, whofe talte in the virtu led him once, in a fit of abfence and fluttering to bloody exercifes,would naturally have fpirits, too readily executed what was wifhed that every Roman had at leaft propofed, by a very impertinent meffage three heads, that he might never be dif- which came to him from a pair of people, treffed for want of game, Yet, after all, whom he hardly knew further than by I'm afraid that this good-natured fenti- name. Though at the fame time it hap-' ment of Caligula might, by fome fevere pened to be the very thing he had inmoralift, be imputed rather to indolence tended to do; for the fake of avoiding than to real humanity: for fometimes, fuch unreasonable and illiberal reflec to be fure, Decipimur fpecie rectitions as in fome fituations are naturalWe are impofed upon by false appear. ances of virtue.

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'How!-Caliban turned critic!'Which Caliban? for they're a numerous family,blefs their sweet bodies' and feveral of them critics.'-'Lord! I mean the great lubberly fea-calf that was found foring with open mouth upon the beach after the laft fpring-tide. O he!'

Yes, a critic to be fure; and, ftupid as you may think him, he may be of excellent ule to a reader who has his cue: for he must be read backwards; as the very reverfe of his opinions will generally, I don't fay always, be just and true.' Most of our prefent critics naturally enough put me in mind of an arch thing that a certain witty gentleman faid upon a fimilar occafion: Optat Ephippia bos piger-The heavy ox" would gladly be

ly to be apprehended from malice or ig

norance.

What d'ye mean by faying always 'fame day, faid day? Can't you fay the fame day, you barbarian? I have often heard you fay lay, where you ought to fay lye. Blefs your body! Why do you put always, inftead of always put, the adverb after the verb? It has a vile effect: but you may fufficiently flatten your language without it; for it is languid and drawling ♦ enough at the best. You have got a despicable habit, too, of saying neither this or that. If you understood even the mechanical rules of grammar, you would fay neither this, nor that, nor any thing. I fuppofe you'll fet about coining new words by and by. But depend upon it you'll never make one F 2

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Impudence, the thriving fon of Stupidity, will make very small talents do great things.

that will find itself admiffible to theters of the utmost consequence to their English language. It will refpue every own precious lives.' word that is iffued from your mint.For my part, as it seems hitherto un⚫ determined whether one fhould fay • never or ever, as in the following inftance-If a patriot was ever fo active in attempting the ruin of his country till this fubtle point is decided, I shall fometimes fay ever, fometimes never, just as it happens to fuit my ear."

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Pray, why don't you roll about in your carriage again, as you did when you were many years younger, and could not fo eafily afford it as now?'

Why, Sir, 1 am, thank Heaven, very able to walk: and without a great ⚫ deal of exercife, I can neither eat nor fleep. Befides, Sir, I always hated that jolting over the ftones; and every good day, when I envied all foot paffengers, I ufed to grudge myfelf the · expence that either my own or other peoples vanity coft me in that article, Now, whenever it rains, or the streets are dirty, I can command a coach or a chair for a mere trifle.'-' But at this rate who will employ you?'- None I hope but a few friends, to whom I molt devoutly with perpetual health; and as foon as this life is grown infipid to them, an eafy and quick paffage to a better; that my tranquillity miv never be interrupted by their dif trefs. Nay, you are welcome to laugh

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at me as long as you ple, fe; but my ⚫ present scheme is to pafs the time as agreeably as I can, and to have no more to do with bufinefs than is confiftent with that fcheme.'-' Well, thou'rt a strange fellow; a most unhappy mixture of ambition, indolence, love of pleasure, and a kind of deli

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cacy very ill calculated to fucceed in the fcramble of life. No, I beg your pardon, I am pretty well cured of my ambition. For when I fee what fort of geniules very commonly make по fmall noife and bustle-But I would not be thought to envy where I have always defpifed-Non equidem invi. deo, miror magis. Though, after all, there is but little room here for wonder, confidering what kind of people ⚫ conttitute the great majority of all ranks in a certain overgrown town: and how eyen many of them, that in other common affairs are not fools, to avoid the trouble of judging for themfelves, often follow the reft in mat

That glaring dim-eyed pug is in fuch vogue, that though I know him to be, in point of understanding, amongst the most vulgar of the human race; I am almoft tempted to impofe fo ftrangely upon my own judgment, as to imagine there is fomething in him.

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Pray, who is that facetious gentle'man? He can't fo much as afk how you do without laughing. He must lead a merry life. D'ye know him?— Upon my word, not I. But I have obferved that the dulleft people generally laugh the moft: from a confcioufnefs, perhaps, of their own infipidity, which they endeavour to disguise by the exercise of laughing.'

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For Heaven's fake, my dear friend, 'don't make a trade of laughing. If your aim is to be witty every hour of the day, you'll turn out a teazing, dif ' agreeable companion. When the wea ther or the company is against you, keep yourfelf quiet; and never be afhamed to be dull amongst block. heads, let them be never fo noify. In converfation, wit fhould be accidental; otherways you must naturally despise it's vanity and affectation. Meantime, after mangling a joke that has thrown ten or a dozen fenfible people into a hearty fit of laughing, don't be fo cruel as to doubt whether it really was a joke or not; and to conclude, be'cause you cannot recollect all the circumftances, that the mirth it produced muft have been owing to the manner of faying it. Befides, that fometimes a very good joke can hardly be re peated without lofing it's fpirit; the beft jokes, though they are felt imme diately by people of proper fenfations, are not always eafily explained as to the mode of titillation, with which they affect the rifible faculty; except perhaps by fome phlegmatic metaphyfical connoiffeur in wit, who never once felt a good joke in his life.-Pray, what is it that pleafes you in the fmell of a jonquil, a rofe, or a gilly-flower? If 'you're refolved not to enjoy their fia grance till that is explained, you may as well fhut up your note for ever,'

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I have feen a moft unnatural extravagant piece of abfurdity received with

great

great applaufe; while flashes of true wit have paffed without the leaft notice. It is fo eafy to tickle fools with blafphemy, petulance, and any kind of indecent ribaldry, that thefe are the common refources of every crazy impudent fellow who would pafs for a

wit.

You never meet with any impertinence in the company of well-bred people while you are decent and inoffenfive yourfelf, you have no difagreeable behaviour in any shape to apprehend from them. And the more wit any man has, you will, almost without exception, find him the lefs apt to be petulant.

There is nothing fo provoking as the impertinent compliments of a fool who wishes you well; who fhocks you while he thinks he is doing you a pleasure.

It happened, as I have been informed, that several years ago a gentleman, whofe name I cannot at present recollect, obferved to Mr. T. that Mr. B. though he passed for a man of genius, was rather a hum-drum companion, and feldom fail any thing very remarkable. To which Mr. M. told me that Mr. T. replied- Aye, but he never fails to improve what you fay. This feemed to be performing the part of rather a cold back friend. For I have known Mr. T. fhine whole evenings together upon hints, in a manner whispered to him by the forefaid Mr. B-; while he happened to be either too modeft or too indolent to purfue them himself. But a man of ticklish fenfations may find it impoffible to be happy and in good humour in the company of certain particular people, whom at the fame time he may perhaps regard for fome good qualities.

I forgot who told me that Mr. T. fhould once upon a time have asked how a certain gentleman, whose name has flipt through my memory, could poffibly be a poet, as he had never once feen a hill. Now I apprehend that M. T. must have been mifinformed here; for I remember to have met the very gentleman in question one Sunday evening, I think it might have been towards June or July, upon the utmost fummit of Conflitution Hill.

One evening, after the rest of the

company were gone, that most delightful companion Mr. Q. who should have died hereafter, told an acquaintance of mine, that in cafe he outlived him, he would do a friendly office to his memory; and asked him where he would chufe to have his buft fet up. • Any where,' replied the other, after thanking Mr. Q. for the great honour he intended him, but in Weftmin'fter Abbey.'

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To come to an end with anecdotes of this kind. One who had published fome things with tolerable fuccefs, told me, that his having passed for a poet, had done him more mischief than any fenfible perfon could easily conceive; but at the fame time he could not help owning, that it had oftener than once procured him the honour of a bow, in paffing along the Strand or Fleet Street, from a gentleman with whom he never had any further acquaintance. I have, oftener than once heard the fame perfon mention one circumftance with particular regret; that he had never been able to difcover or guess amongst all his acquaintances, to whom he was obliged for an elegant prefent, left at his lodgings fome years ago by a gentleman who did not leave his name; and to whom, of courfe, he could not exprefs his due acknowledgments for a favour which he highly values.

Sir, fays one, this piece, even if all the parts could be well perform ́ed, would hardly fucceed here. It 'might, perhaps, at Paris; where every one that goes to the play, is as ferioufly attentive as the most devout people here are to a fermon. But in fome places natural and unexagge• rated representations of life are not felt; the audience must be kept awake with fhew, noife, and bustle. Here the genteeler part of the company are indeed merely spectators; they go to fee, and difplay themfelves to one another. And what other reasonable motive can they have-confidering what kind of entertainment the stage for the most part exhibits at present?' I tell you, Sir,' fays another upon different occafion, this is ftupid, indecent, villainous trafh. But have you read it? Yes, above a dozen lines. That's hardly enough; read the whole, and then judge. God forbid!-muft I eat a whole

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a whole faddle of mutton before I have a right to lay it is vile rotten ftuff?' That a writer with very middling, and even contemptible parts, may do a great deal more mischief than thofe of the first abilities can do good, is too evident. How much more fuccessful have a parcel of indecent, profligate, lying, inflammatory fcribblers, been of late years, in ftupifying, and brutalizing a whole nation; than thofe elegant, genteel moral writers, who shone about the beginning of this century, were in refining and polishing it!-But it is much easier to fet fire to a palace cr a temple, than to white-wafh a cottage.

Some of thofe black guard gen ufes are Poets too, God wot!-With crazy, ftupid heads, and bad hearts; without one fpark of imagination; without either fenie, verlification, or language, they are Poets; and the fittelt indeed to gain the applaufe of the vulgar, great and jmall, bigh and low. For they icribble juit fuch trath as any of the rabble would that could fcribble at all. Their works are truly adapted to the meanest capacities. Their poetry is the dulleit prote spurred up into an aukward, hobbing afs-trot. Quite oppolite to Or phous, and thofe real poets, whofe moral harmony first humanized the woodland

favages, and tamed them into focial life; thefe nightingales of Newgate, thefe black fwans of Fleet Ditch, these infernal fcreech owls, ing nothing but fongs of difcord, and fedition, and treafon. But not all the rage and fury of the most rancorous hearts can route the

poetical impotence of thofe bards to any thing above the infipidity of flat unmannerly abufe, which they and their admirers call fatire. However, they cannot last long. One may venture to prophefy a fhort life, and an infamous memory, to the ftupid ditties of all fuch Poets; and it is an indifputable truth that no Muse ever yet dwelt in the breaft of a scoundrel.

Several of these detached Sentences and Reveries were fet down as materials for a poetical fatire; but as the general run of readers here do not underitand verfe, except it is fo itupid as none but a muse-bit blockhead can poffibly write, it is faving fome needlets pains to send them out in their present shape. So let them go: and if our noble matters the Mobility do not relish them, fo much the better. They are the more likely to procure the approbation of those few judges to whole praise alone one would chufe to afpire.

T

SKETCH XLVI,

A PLAN OF A DEDICATION,

HE late Mr. Cibber addreffed the Apology for his Life To a cer. tain Gentleman; whereas I LAUNCELOT TEMPLE prefume to addrels my

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impudent quackery in every shape, meets with encouragement, I appear to you, whom I have always deemed the confummate judge of literary merit: and I fly in a Huttering hurry to your protec tion. It woud offend your modeity, Sir, fhould I give way to the enthufiaim with which I have conftantly admired your amiable behaviour in private life; in the various characters of ion, father, brother, hufband, uncle, confin, lovet, friend, debtor, creditor, master. &c. &c. together with your † juperlative powers

of

This compliment was made, feveral years ago, by a writer of uncommon genius and ilities, in a Dedication to a certain distinguished perfonage; though fome fay it has never yet appeared upon what foundation.

This is one of many news-paper compliments which I am credibly informed fome Patriots from day to day have flily made to themfelves, with great fuccefs, among it a parcel of blind, ignorant, credulous people, who never will learn to fmell a rat, but where there

is none.

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