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INFORMATION TO INTENDING EMIGRANTS.

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of all the necessary and useful kinds, to supply those of linen and woollen goods for sale, has been several cultivators of the earth with houses, and with furniture times attempted in different provinces; but those proand utensils of the grosser sorts, which cannot so well jects have generally failed, goods of equal value being be brought from Europe. Tolerably good workmen in imported cheaper. And when the governments have any of those mechanic arts, are sure to find employ, been solicited to support such schemes by encourageand to be well paid for their work, there being no re- ments in money, or by imposing duties on importation straints preventing strangers from exercising any art of such goods, it has been generally refused, on this they understand, nor any permission necessary. If principle, that if the country is ripe for the manufacture, they are poor, they begin first as servants or journey- it may be carried on by private persons to advantage; men; and if they are sober, industrious, and frugal, and, if not, it is folly to think of forcing nature. Great tbey soon become masters, establish themselves in establishments of manufactures require great numbers business, marry, raise families, and become respectable of poor to do the work for small wages; those poor are citizens.

to be found in Europe, but will not be found in America, Also, persons of moderate families and capitals, who, till the lands are all taken up and cultivated, and the having a number of children to provide for, are desi- excess of people who cannot get land want employment. res of bringing them up to industry, and to secure The manufacture of silk, they say, is natural in France, states to their posterity, have opportunities of doing it as that of cloth in England, because each country proa America which Europe does not afford. There they duces in plenty the first material; but if England will may be taught and practise profitable mechanic arts, have a manufacture of silk as well as that of cloth, and rithout incurring disgrace on that account; but, on the France of cloth as well as that of silk, these unnatural centrary, acquiring respect to such abilities. There operations must be supported by mutual prohibitions, wall capitals laid out in lands, which daily become more or high duties, on the importation of each other's goods; valuable by the increase of people, afford a solid pro- by which means the workmen are enabled to tax the spect of ample fortunes thereafter for those children. home consumer by greater prices, while the higher The writer of this has known several instances of large wages they receive makes them neither happier nor tracts of land bought on what was then the frontiers of richer, since they only drink more and work less. Pennsylvania, for ten pounds per hundred acres, which, Therefore the governments in America do nothing to after twenty years, when the settlements had been encourage such projects. The people by this means extended far beyond them, sold readily, without any are not imposed on either by the merchant or mechanic: improvement made upon them, for three pounds per if the merchant demands too much profit on imported acte

. The acre in America is the same with the Eng- shoes, they buy of the shoemaker; and if he asks too Ish acre, or the acre of Normandy.

high a price, they take them of the merchant: thus Those who desire to understand the state of govern- the two professions are checks on each other. The nent in America, would do well to read the constitu- shoemaker, however, has on the whole a considerable ions of the several States, and the articles of confedera- profit upon his labour in America, beyond what he had tion which bind the whole together for general purposes, in Europe, as he can add to his price a sum nearly under the direction of one assembly, called the Congress. equal to all the expenses of freight and commission, risk Those constitutions have been printed, by order of Con- or assurance, &c., necessarily charged by the merchant. Teks, in America; two editions of them have been And the case is the same with the workman in every printed in London; and a good translation of them in other mechanic art. Hence it is, that the artizans French has lately been published at Paris.

generally live better and more easily in America than Several of the princes of Europe have of late, from in Europe; and such as are good economists make a an opinion of advantage to arise by producing all com-comfortable provision for age, and for their children. modities and manufactures within their own dominions, Such may, therefore, remove with advantage to America. ) as to diminish or render useless their importations, In the old long-settled countries of Europe, all arts, endeavoured to entice workmen from other countries, trades, professions, farms, &c., are so full, that it is difby high salaries, privileges, &c. Many persons, pre- ficult for a poor man who has children to place them tending to be skilled in various great manufactures, where they may gain, or learn to gain, a decent liveliimagining that America must be in want of them, and hood. The artizans, who fear creating future rivals that the Congress would probably be disposed to imitate in business, refuse to take apprentices, but upon conthe princes above mentioned, have proposed to go over ditions of money, maintenance, or the like, which the en condition of having their passages paid, lands given, parents are unable to comply with. Hence the youth salaries appointed, exclusive privileges for terms of are dragged up in ignorance of every gainful art, and years, &c. Such persons, on reading the articles of obliged to become soldiers, or servants, or thieves, for tanfederation, will find that the Congress have no power a subsistence. In America, the rapid increase of inemmitted to them, or money put into their hands, for habitants takes away that fear of rivalship, and artizans sech

purposes ; and that, if any such encouragement is willingly receive apprentices from the hope of profit by even, it must be by the government of some separate their labour, during the remainder of the time stipulated, state. This, however, has rarely been done in Ame- after they shall be instructed. Hence it is easy for poor nica; and when it has been done, it has rarely succeeded families to get their children instructed ; for the artizans was to establish a manufacture, which the country was are so desirous of apprentices, that many of them will 1st yet so ripe for, as to encourage private persons even give money to the parents, to have boys from a set it up; labour being generally too dear, and 10 to 15 years of age bound apprentices to them till the bands difficult to be kept together, every one desiring age of 21; and many poor parents have, by that means,

a be a master, and the cheapness of land inclining on their arrival in the country, raised money enough any to leave trades for agriculture. Some indeed to buy land sufficient to establish themselves, and to

bave met with success, and are carried on to advan- subsist the rest of the family by agriculture. These age; but they are generally such as require only a contracts for apprentices are made before a magistrate, v hands, or wherein great part of the work is per- who regulates the agreement according to reason and kormed by machines. Goods that are bulky, and of so justice ; and, having in view the formation of a future szall a value as not well to bear the expense of freight, useful citizen, obliges the master to engage by a written Bay often be made cheaper in the country than they indenture, not only that, during the time of service an be imported; and the manufacture of such goods stipulated, the apprentice shall be duly provided with till be profitable wherever there is a sufficient demand. meat, drink, apparel, washing, and lodging, and at its The farmers in America produce indeed a good deal of expiration with a complete new suit of clothes, but also,

Fool and flax, and none is exported—it is all worked up; that he shall be taught to read, write, and cast accounts; but it is in the way of domestic manufacture, for the and that he shall be well instructed in the art or proise of the family. The buying up quantities of wool fession of his master, or some other, by which he may ad flax, with the design to employ spinners, weavers, afterwards gain a livelihood, and be able in his turn to 4e

. and form great establishments, producing quantities raisc a family. A copy of this indenture is given to the

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80

THOUGHTS ON COMMERCIAL SUBJECTS.

course.

AND UPON MANUFACTURES.

OF AN OPEN TRADE.

apprentice or his friends, and the magistrate keeps a every district, who, from sickness or a great number of record of it, to which recourse may be had, in case of children, will be so distressed by a high price of corn failure by the master in any point of performance. as to need relief; and these should be taken care of by This desire among the masters to have more hands particular benefactions, without restraining the farmer's employed in working for them, induces them to pay the profit. passage of young persons of both sexes, who, on their Those who fear that exportation may so far drain arrival, agree to serve them one, two, three, or four the country of corn as to starve ourselves, fear what years; those who have already learned a trade agree- never did, nor never can, happen. They may as well, ing for a shorter term, in proportion to their skill, and when they view the tide ebbing towards the sea, fear the consequent immediate value of their service; and that all the water will leave the river. The price of those who have none, agreeing for a longer term, in corn, like water, will find its own level. The more we consideration of being taught an art their poverty would export, the dearer it becomes at home; the more is renot permit them to acquire in their own country. ceived abroad, the cheaper it becomes there; and as

The almost general mediocrity of fortune that pre- soon as these prices are equal, the exportation stops of vails in America, obliging its people to follow some As the seasons vary in different countries, the business for subsistence, those vices that arise usually calamity of a bad harvest is never universal. If, then, from idleness, are in a great measure prevented. In- all ports were always open, and all commerce free, dustry and constant employment are great preservatives every maritime country would generally eat bread at of the morals and virtue of a nation. Hence bad ex.. the medium price, or average of all the harvests; which amples to youth are more rare in America, which must would probably be more equal than we can make by be a comfortable consideration to parents. To this may our artificial regulations, and therefore a more steady be truly added, that serious religion, under its various encouragement to agriculture. The nation would all denominations, is not only tolerated, but respected and have bread at this middle price; and that nation, which practised. Atheism is unknown there; and infidelity at any time inhumanely refuses to relieve the distresses rare and secret: so that persons may live to a great of another nation, deserves no compassion when in age in that country, without having their piety shocked distress itself. by meeting with either an atheist or infidel. And the Divine Being seems to have manifested his approbation OF THE EFFECTS OF DEARNESS OF PROVISIONS UPON WORKING, of the mutual forbearance and kindness with which the different sects treat each other, by the remarkable pro- The common people do not work for pleasure gene. sperity with which he has been pleased to favour the rally, but from necessity. Cheapness of provisions whole country.

makes them more idle ; less work is then done ; it is then more in demand proportionally, and of course the price rises. Dearness of provisions the manu

facturer to work more days and more hours; thus more THOUGHTS ON COMMERCIAL SUBJECTS. work is done than equals the usual demand : of course

it becomes cheaper, and the manufactures in conseOF EMBARGOES UPON CORN, AND OF THE POOR.

quence. In inland high countries, remote from the sea, and whose rivers are small, running from the country, and not to it, as is the case with Switzerland, great distress Perhaps, in general, it would be better if government may arise from a course of bad harvests, if public gra- meddled no farther with trade than to protect it, and naries are not provided and kept well stored. Anciently, let it take its course. Most of the statutes, or acts, too, before navigation was so general, ships so plenty, edicts, or arrests, and placards of parliaments, princes, and commercial transactions so well established, even and states, for regulating, directing, or restraining of maritime countries might be occasionally distressed trade, have, we think, been either political blunders, by bad crops. But such is now the facility of commu- or jobs obtained by artful men for private advantage, nication between those countries, that an unrestrained under pretence of public good. When Colbert assembled commerce can scarce ever fail of procuring a sufficiency some of the wise old merchants of France, and desired for any of them. If, indeed, any government is so im- their advice and opinion how he could best serve and prudent as to lay its hands on imported corn, forbid its promote commerce, their answer, after consultation, exportation, or compel its sale at limited prices, there was in three words only, Laisses nous faire; “ Let us the people may suffer some famine from merchants alone." It is said by a very solid writer of the same avoiding their ports. But wherever commerce is nation, that he is well advanced in the science of poliknown to be always free, and the merchant absolute tics who knows the full force of that maxim, Pas trop master of his commodity, as in Holland, there will al- gouverner-"Not to govern too much ;" which, perhaps, ways be a reasonable supply.

would be of more use when applied to trade, than in When an exportation of corn takes place, occasioned any other public concern. by a higher price in some foreign countries, it is com- It were therefore to be wished, that commerce were mon to raise a clamour, on the supposition that we shall as free between all the nations of the world as it is bethereby produce a domestic famine. Then follows a tween the several counties of England; so would all, prohibition, founded on the imaginary distresses of the by mutual communications, obtain more enjoyments. poor. The poor, to be sure, if in distress, should be Those counties do not ruin each other by trade, neither relieved; but if the farmer could have a high price for would the nations. No nation was ever ruined by trade, his corn from the foreign demand, must he, by a pro- even, seemingly, the most disadvantageous. hibition of exportation, be compelled to take a low price, Wherever desirable superfluities are imported, innot of the poor only, but of every one that eats bread, dustry is excited, and thereby plenty is produced. even the richest? The duty of relieving the poor is Were only necessaries permitted to be purchased, men incumbent on the rich; but by this operation the whole would work no more than necessary for that purpose. burden of it is laid on the farmer, who is to relieve the

OF PROHIBITIONS WITH RESPECT TO THE EXPORTATION OF rich at the same time. Of the poor, too, those who are maintained by the parishes have no right to claim this sacrifice of the farmer; as, while they have their allow- Could Spain and Portugal have succeeded in exccutance, it makes no difference to them whether bread be ing their foolish laws for hedging in the cuckoo, as Locke cheap or dear. Those working poor, who now mind calls it, and have kept at home all the gold and silver, business only five or four days in the week, if bread those metals would by this time have been of little more should be so dear as to oblige them to work the whole value than so much lead or iron. Their plenty would six required by the commandment, do not seem to be have lessened their value. We see the folly of these aggrieved so as to have a right to public redress. There edicts; but are not our own prohibitory and restrictive will then remain comparatively only a few families in laws, that are professedly made with intention to bring

GOLD AND SILVER.

ACCOUNT OF THE CUSTOM OF WHITEWASHING.

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a balance in our favour from our trade with foreign to fill up the remainder of this sheet, and may afford

nations to be paid in money, and laws to prevent the you some amusement. fer necessity of exporting that money, which, if they could When a young couple are about to enter into the d be thoroughly executed, would make money as plenty, matrimonial state, a never-failing article in the mar

and of as little value- I say, are not such laws akin to riage-treaty is, that the lady shall have and enjoy the those Spanish edicts-follies of the same family? free and unmolested exercise of the rights of white

washing, with all its ceremonials, privileges, and appurIn fact, the produce of other countries can hardly be

tenances. A young woman would forego the most s, fea: obtained, unless by fraud and rapine, without giving advantageous connection, and even disappoint the

the produce of our land or our industry in exchange for warmest wish of her heart, rather than resign the in them. If we have mines of gold and silver, gold and valuable right. You would wonder what this privilege

silver may then be called the produce of our land; if of white-washing is: I will endeavour to give you some nda we have not, we can only fairly obtain those metals by idea of the ceremony, as I have seen it performed. giving for them the produce of our land or industry.

There is no season of the year in which the lady may ops

When we have them, they are then only that produce not claim her privilege, if she pleases; but the latter than

or industry in another shape ; which we may give, if end of May is most generally fixed upon for the purpose. the trade requires it, and our other produce will not The attentive husband may judge by certain prognos

suit, in exchange for the produce of some other country tics when the storm is nigh at hand. When the lady is wjob that furnishes what we have more occasion for, or more

unusually fretful, finds faults with the servants, is disdesire. When we have, to an inconvenient degree, contented with the children, and complains much of parted with our gold and silver, our industry is stimu- the filthiness of every thing about her--these are signs lated afresh to procure more, that by its means we

which ought not to be neglected; yet they are not demay contrive to procure the same advantages.

cisive, as they sometimes come on and go off again, without producing any farther effect. But if, when

the husband rises in the morning, he should observe When princes make war by prohibiting commerce, in the yard a wheel-barrow with a quantity of lime in each may hurt himself as much as his enemy. Traders, it, or should see certain buckets with lime dissolved

who by their business are promoting the common good in water, there is then no time to be lost ; he imme-КІМ,

of mankind, as well as farmers and fishermen, who diately locks up the apartment or closet where his palabour for the subsistence of all, should never be inter- pers or private property is kept, and, putting the key

rupted or molested in their business, but enjoy the pro- in his pocket, betakes himself to flight ; for a husband, sions tection of all in the time of war, as well as in the time however beloved, becomes a perfect nuisance during

this season of female rage_his authority is superseded, This policy those we are pleased to call barbarians his commission is suspended, and the very scullion whó have, in a great measure, adopted: for the trading sub- cleans the brasses in the kitchen, becomes of more conjects of any power with whom the emperor of Morocco sideration and importance than he. He has nothing may be at war, are not liable to capture, when within for it but to abdicate, and run from an evil which he sight of his land, going or coming; and have otherwise can neither prevent nor mollify. free liberty to trade and reside in his dominions.

The husband gone, the ceremony begins. The walls As a maritime power, we presume it is not thought are in a few minutes stripped of their furniture; paintright that Great Britain should grant such freedom, ings, prints, and looking-glasses, lie in a huddled heap

except partially, as in the case of war with France, about the floors; the curtains are torn from the tesand when tobacco is allowed to be sent thither under the ters; the beds crammed into the windows ; chairs and sanction of passports.

tables, bedsteads and cradles, crowd the yard; and

the garden fence bends beneath the weight of carpets, 23 of In transactions of trade it is not to be supposed that, blankets, cloth cloaks, old coats, and ragged breeches.

Here like gaming, what one party gains the other must ne

may be seen the lumber of the kitchen, forming ibi cessarily lose. The gain to each may be equal. If A a dark and confused mass ; for the foreground of the

has more corn than he can consume, but wants cattle, picture, gridirons and fryingpans, rusty shovels and and B has more cattle, but wants corn, exchange is broken tongs, spits and pots, and the fractured remains gain to each: hereby the common stock of comforts in of rush-bottomed chairs. There a closet has disgorged life is increased.

its bowels, cracked tumblers, broken wine glasses, phials of forgotten physic, papers of unknown powders, seeds

and dried herbs, handfuls of old corks, tops of teapots, It is impossible for government to circumscribe or and stoppers of departed decanters ;—from the ragtro fix the extent of paper credit, which must of course hole in the garret to the rat-hole in the cellar, no place laps

fluctuate. Government may as well pretend to lay escapes unrummaged. It would seem as if the day of down rules for the operations, or the confidence, of general doom was come, and the utensils of the house every individual in the course of his trade. Any seem

were dragged forth to judgment. In this tempest, the жеге ing temporary evil arising must naturally work its own

words of Lear naturally present themselves, and might, cure.

with some alteration, be made strictly applicable :

." Let the great gods,

That keep this dreadful pudder o'er our heads, ada HUMOROUS ACCOUNT

Find out their en'mnies now. Tremble, thou wretch,

That hast within thee undivulged crimes
OF A CUSTOM AMONG THE AMERICANS, ENTITLED WHITE- Unwhipt of justice !"

“ Close pent-up guilt,
My wish is to give you some account of the people

Raise your concealing continents, and ask

These dreadful summoners grace!" of these new States, but I am far from being qualified for the purpose, having as yet seen little more than This ceremony completed, and the house thoroughly the cities of New York and Philadelphia. I have dis- evacuated, the next operation is to smear the walls and covered but few national singul among them. ceilings of every room and closet with brushes dipped Their customs and manners are nearly the same with in a solution of lime, called white-wash-to pour buckets those of England, which they have long been used to of water over every floor, and scratch all the partitions copy; for, previous to the revolution, the Americans and wainscots with rough brushes wet with soap-suds, were from their infancy taught to look up to the Eng- and dipped in stone-cutter's sand. The windows by nó lish as patterns of perfection in all things. I have ob- means escape the general deluge. A servant scrambles served, however, one custom, which, for aught I know, out upon the pent-house, at the risk of her neck; and

is peculiar to this country; an account of it will serve with a mug in her hand, and a bucket within reach, ng

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ACCOUNT OF THE CUSTOM OF WHITEWASHING.

she dashes away innumerable gallons of water against | fancies, and made so ornamental, that the women have the glass panes, to the great annoyance of the passen. admitted the fashion without perceiving the design. gers in the street.

There is also another alleviation of the husband's dis I have been told that an action at law was once tress ; le generally has the privilege of a small room brought against one of these water nymphs, by a per- or closet for his books and papers, the key of which he son who had a new suit of clothes spoiled by this ope- is allowed to keep. This is considered as a privileged ration ; but, after long argument, it was determined by place, and stands like the land of Goshen amid the the whole court that the action would not lie, inasmuch plagues of Egypt. But then he must be extremely as the defendant was in the exercise of a legal right, cautious, and ever on his guard; for should he inadand not answerable for the consequences and so the vertently go abroad and leave the key in his door, the poor gentleman was doubly nonsuited; for he lost not housemaid, who is always on the watch for such an oponly his suit of clothes, but his suit at law.

portunity, immediately enters in triumph with buckets, These smearings and scratchings, washings and brooms, and brushes ; takes possession of the premises, dashings, being duly performed, the next ceremony is to and forthwith puts all his books and papers to rightscleanse and replace the distracted furniture. You may to his utter confusion, and sometimes serious detrihave seen a house raising, or a ship-launch, when all the ment. For instance : hands within reach are collected together : recollect, if A gentleman was sued by the executors of a tradesyou can, the hurry, bustle, confusion, and noise, of such man, on a charge found against him in the deceased's å scene, and you will have some idea of this cleaning books, to the amount of £30. The defendant was match. The misfortune is, that the sole object is to strongly impressed with an idea that he had discharged make things clean—it matters not how many useful, or the debt, and taken a receipt ; but as the transaction namental, or valuable articles are mutilated, or suffer was of long standing, he knew not where to find the death, under the operation : a mahogany chair and receipt. The suit went on in course, and the time apcarved frame undergo the same discipline; they are to be proached when judgment would be obtained against made clean at all events, but their preservation is not him. He then sat seriously down to examine a large worthy of attention. For instance, a fine large en- bundle of old papers, which he had untied and displayed graving is laid flat upon the floor-smaller prints are on a table for that purpose. In the midst of his search, piled upon it—and the superincumbent weight cracks he was suddenly called away on business of importance ; the glasses of the lower tier ; but this is of no conse- he forgot to lock the door of his room. The housemaid, quence. A valuable picture is placed leaning against who had been long looking out for such an opportunity, the sharp corner of a table; others are made to lean immediately entered with the usual implements, and against that, until the pressure of the whole forces the with great alacrity fell to cleaning the room, and putcorner of the table through the canvass of the first. The ting things to rights. The first object that struck her frame and glass of a fine print are to be cleaned--the was the confused situation of the papers on the table ; spirit and oil used on this occasion are suffered to leak these were without delay bundled together like so many through and spoil the engraving; no matter, if the glass dirty knives and forks ; but in the action a small piece is clean, and the frame shine, it is sufficient--the rest is of paper fell unnoticed on the floor, which happened to not worthy of consideration. An able arithmetician has be the very receipt in question : as it had no very remade an accurate calculation, founded on long expe- spectable appearance, it was soon after swept out with rience, and has discovered, that the losses and destruc- the common dirt of the room, and carried in a rubbish tions incident to two white-washings are equal to one pan into the yard. The tradesman had neglected to removal, and three removals equal to one fire. enter the credit in his book; the defendant could find

The cleaning frolic over, matters begin to resume nothing to obviate the charge—and so judgment went their pristine appearance. The storm abates, and all against him for the debt and costs. A fortnight after would be well again, but it is impossible that so great a the whole was settled, and the money paid, one of the convulsion, in so small a communion, should not pro- children found the receipt among the rubbish in the duce some farther effects. For two or three weeks yard. after the op ation, the family are usually afflicted with There is also another custom peculiar to the city of sore throats or sore eyes, occasioned by the caustic Philadelphia, and nearly allied to the former; I mean quality of the lime, or with severe colds, from the ex- that of washing the pavement before the doors every halations of wet floors or damp walls.

Saturday evening. I at first took this to be a regulaI know a gentleman who is fond of accounting for tion of the police; but, on farther inquiry, find it is a reevery thing in a philosophical way. He considers this, ligious rite, preparatory to the Sabbath; and is, I bewhich I have called a custom, as a real periodical dis- lieve, the only religious rite in which the numerous ease, peculiar to the climate. His train of reasoning sectaries of this city perfectly agree. The ceremony is ingenious and whimsical ; but I am not at leisure to begins about sunset, and continues till about ten or give you a detail. The result was, that he found the eleven at night. It is very difficult for a stranger to distemper to be incurable; but, after much study, he walk the streets on those evenings—he runs a continual conceived he had discovered a method to divert the risk of having a bucket of dirty water thrown against evil he could not subdue. For this purpose he caused his legs ; but a Philadelphian born is so much accusa small building, about twelve feet square, to be erected tomed to the danger, that he avoids it with surprising in his garden, and furnished with some ordinary chairs dexterity. It is from this circumstance that a Philaand tables ; and a few prints of the cheapest sort were delphian may be known any where by his gait. The hung against the wall." His hope was, that when the streets of New York are paved with rough stones; white-washing frenzy seized the females of his family, these indeed are not washed, but the dirt is so thothey might repair to this apartment, and scrub, and roughly swept from before the doors, that the stones smear, and scour, to their heart's content; and so stand up sharp and prominent, to the great inconvespend the violence of the disease in this out-post, while nience of those who are not accustomed to so rough a he enjoyed himself in quiet at head-quarters. But the path. But habit reconciles every thing: It is divertexperiment did not answer his expectation; it was im. ing enough to see a Philadelphian at New York; he possible it should, since a principal part of the gratifi- walks the streets with as much most painful caution as cation consists in the lady’s having an uncontrolled right if his toes were covered with corns, or his feet lamed to torment her husband at least once a-year, and to turn with the gout; while a New Yorker, as little approving him out of doors, and take the reins of government into the plain masonry of Philadelphia, shuffles along the her own hands.

pavement like a parrot on a mahogany table. There is a much better contrivance than this of the It must be acknowledged, that the ablutions I have philosopher's, which is to cover the walls of the house mentioned are attended with no small inconvenience ; with paper; this is generally done, and though it can- but the women would not be induced, from any consinot abolish, it at least shortens the period of female do- deration, to resign their privilege. Notwithstanding minion. The paper is decorated with flowers of various this, I can give you the strongest assurances, that the

WHITE-WASHING-A LADY'S ANSWER.

83

WRITER.

fomen of America make the most faithful wives, and needles, rosin, wax, silk, thread, rags, jags, tags, books, the most attentive mothers, in the world; and I am sure pamphlets, and papers. Lord bless me! I am almost you will join me in opinion, that if a married man is out of breath, and yet I have not enumerated half the made miserable only one week in a whole year, he will articles. Well

, to work he went; and although I did have no great cause to complain of the matrimonial not understand the object of his manæuvres, yet I bond. I am, &c.

could sufficiently discover that he did not succeed in any one operation. I was glad of that, I confess, and with good reason too: for, after he fatigued him

self with mischief, like a monkey in a china-shop, and ANSWER TO THE ABOVE.

had called the servants to clear every thing away, I

took a view of the scene my parlour exhibited. I shall IN THE CHARACTER OF A LADY, BUT REALLY BY THE SAME

not even attempt a minute description; suffice it to

say, that he had overset his ink-stand, and stained my SIR, I have lately seen a letter upon the subject of best mahogany table with ink; he had spilt a quantity while-washing, in which that necessary duty of a good of vitriol, and burnt a large hole in my carpet ; my housewife is treated with unmerited ridicule. I should marble hearth was all over spotted with melted rosin: probably have forgot the foolish thing by this time; beside this, he had broken three china cups, four winebut the season coming on which most women think glasses, two tumblers, and one of my handsomest de. suitable for cleansing their apartments from the smoke canters. And, after all

, as I said before, I perceived and dirt of the winter, I find this saucy author dished that he had not succeeded in any one operation. By up in every family, and his flippant performance quoted the bye, tell your friend, the white-wash scribbler, that wherever a wife attempts to exercise her reasonable this is one means by which our closets become furprerogative, or execute the duties of her station. Wo- nished with halves of china bowls, cracked tumblers, men generally employ their time to better purpose broken wine-glasses, tops of tea-pots, and stoppers of than scribbling. The cares and comforts of a family departed decanters. I say, I took a view of the dirt rest principally upon their shoulders-hence it is that and devastation my philosophic husband had occasioned; there are but few female authors; and the men, know- and there I sat, “ like patience on a monument, smiling ing how necessary our attentions are to their happiness, at grief ;" but it worked inwardly. I would almost as take every opportunity of discouraging literary accom- soon the melted rosin and vitriol had been in his throat, plishments in the fair sex. You hear it echoed from as on my dear marble hearth, and my beautiful carpet. every quarter—“My wife cannot make verses, it is It is not true that women have no power over their true, but she makes an excellent pudding; she can't own feelings; for, notwithstanding this provocation, I correct the press, but she can correct her children, and said nothing, or next to nothing: for I only observed scold her servants, with admirable discretion; she can't very pleasantly, what a lady of my acquaintance had unravel the intricacies of political economy and federal told me, that the reason why philosophers are called government, but she can knit charming stockings.” literary men, is because they make a great litter--not And this they call praising a wife, and doing justice to a word more. However, the servant cleared away, and her character, with much nonsense of the like kind. down sat the philosopher. A friend dropt in soon

I say, women generally employ their time to much after_“Your servant, Sir; how do you do ?” “ O better purpose than scribbling, otherwise this facetious Lord, I am almost fatigued to death! 'I have been all writer had not gone so long unanswered. We have the morning making philosophical experiments.” I was ladies who sometimes lay down the needle and take up now more hardly put to it to smother a laugh, than I the pan, I wonder none of them have attempted some had been just before to contain my rage; my precious reply. For my part, I do not pretend to be an author. went out soon after, and I, as you may suppose, musI never appeared in print in my life; but I can no longer tered all my forces: brushes, buckets, soap, sand, limeforbear saying something in answer to such imperti- skins, and cocoa-nut shells, with all the powers of nence, circulate how it may. Only, Sir, consider our housewifery, were immediately employed. I was cersituation. Men are naturally inattentive to the decencies tainly the best philosopher of the two; for my exof life; but why should I be so complaisant? I say, they periments succeeded, and his did not. All was well are naturally filthy creatures. If it were not that their again, except my poor carpet-my vitriolised carpet connection with the refined sex polished their man--which still continued a mournful memento of phiners, and had a happy influence on the general economy losophic fury, or rather philosophic folly. The opeof life, these lords of the creation would wallow in filth, ration was scarce over, when in came my experimenand populous cities would infect the atmosphere with tal philosopher, and told me, with all the indiffertheir noxious vapours. It is the attention and assiduity ence in the world, that he had invited six gentlemen of the women that prevent men from degenerating into to dine with him at three o'clock. It was then past mere swine. How important, then, are the services one. I complained of the short notice. “ Poh! poh!" we render! and yet for these very services we are said he,“ you can get a leg of mutton, and a loin of veal, made the subject of ridicule and fun. Base ingrati- and a few potatoes, which will do well enough.” Heatude! Nauseous creatures! Perhaps you may think vens, what a chaos must the head of a philosopher be ! I am in a passion. No, Sir, I do assure you I never a leg of mutton, a loin of veal, and potatoes ! I was at was more composed in my life; and yet it is enough a loss whether I should laugh or be angry; but there to provoke a saint to see how unreasonably we are was no time for determining-I had but an hour and treated by the men. Why, now, there's my husband- a half to do a world of business in. My carpet, which a good enough sort of a man in the main; but I will had suffered in the cause of experimental philosophy give you a sample of him. He comes into the parlour in the morning, was destined to be most shamefully disthe other day, where, to be sure, I was cutting up a honoured in the afternoon by a deluge of nasty tobacco

“ Lord !” says he, “ what a futter here juice. Gentlemen smokers love cigars better than is! I can't bear to see the parlour look like a tailor's carpets. Think, Sir, what a woman must endure under shop; besides, I am going to make some important such circumstances : and then, after all, to be reproached philosophical experiments, and must have sufficient with her cleanliness, and to have her white-washings, room." You must know my husband is one of your her scourings, and scrubbings, made the subject of ridiwould-be philosophers. Well, I bundled up my linen cule, it is more than patience can put up with. What as quick as I could, and began to darn a pair of ruffles, I have now exhibited is but a small specimen of the which took no room, and could give no offence. 1 injuries we sustain from the boasted superiority of men. thought, however, I would watch my lord and master's But we will not be laughed out of our cleanliness. A important business. In about half an hour the tables woman would rather be called any thing than a slut, as were covered with all manner of trumpery-bottles of a man would rather be thought a knave than a fool. I water, phials of drugs, pasteboard, paper and cards, had a great deal more to say, but am called away; we glue, paste, and gum-arabic-files, knives, scissors, are just preparing to whitewash, and of course I have

piece of linen.

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