Ros. Love is merely a madness; and, I tell you, deserves as well a dark house and a whip, as madmen do: and the reason why they are not so punish'd and cured, is, that the lunacy is so ordinary, that the whippers are in love too: Yet I profess curing it by counsel. Orla. Did you ever cure any so? He was to Ros. Yes, one; and in this manner. imagine me his love, his mistress; and I set him every day to woo me: At which time would I, being but a moonish youth, grieve, be effeminate, changeable, longing, and liking; proud, fantastical, apish, shallow, inconstant, full of tears, full of smiles; for every passion something, and for no passion truly any thing, as boys and women are for the most part cattle of this colour: would now like him, now loath him; then entertain him, then forswear him; now weep for him, then spit at him; that I drave my suitor from his mad humour of love, to a living humour of madness; which was, to forswear the full stream of the world, and to live in a nook merely monastick: And thus I cur'd him; and this way will I take upon me to wash your liver as clear as a sound sheep's heart, that there shall not be one spot of love in't. Orla. I would not be cur'd, youth. 435 Ros. I would cure you, if you would but call me Rosalind, and come every day to my cote, and woo me. Orla. Now, by the faith of my love, I will; me where it is. tell Res. Ros. Go with me to it, and I will shew it you: and, by the way, you shall tell me where in the forest you live: Will you go? Orla. With all my heart, good youth. Ros. Nay, nay, you must call me Rosalind :-Come, sister, will you go? [Exeunt. SCENE III. Enter Clown, and AUDREY, JAQUES watching them. Clo. Comé apace, good Audrey; I will fetch up your goats, Audrey: And how, Audrey? am I the man yet? doth my simple feature content you? Aud. Your features! Lord warrant us! what fea tures? 451 Clo. I am here with thee and thy goats, as the most capricious poet, honest Ovid, was among the Goths. Jaq. Aside.] O knowledge ill-inhabited! worse than Jove in a thatch'd house! Clo. When a man's verses cannot be understood, nor a man's good wit seconded with the forward child, understanding, it strikes a man more dead than a great reckoning in a little room: Truly, I would the gods had made thee poetical. 460 Aud. I do not know what poetical is: Is it honest in deed, and word? Is it a true thing? Clo. No, truly; for the truest poetry is the most feigning; and lovers are given to poetry; and what they swear in poetry, may be said, as lovers, they do feign. G Aud. Aud. Do you wish then, that the gods had made me poetical? Clo. I do truly: for thou swear'st to me, thou art honest; now if thou wert a poet, I might have some hope thou didst feign. Aud. Would you not have me honest ? 471 Clo. No truly, unless thou wert hard-favour'd: for honesty coupled to beauty, is to have honey a sauce to sugar. Jaq. [Aside.] A material fool! Aud. Well, I am not fair; and therefore I pray the gods make me honest! Clo. Truly, and to cast away honesty upon a foul slut, were to put good meat into an unclean dish. 480 Aud. I am not a slut, though I thank the gods I am foul. Clo. Well, praised be the gods for thy foulness! sluttishness may come hereafter. But be it as it may be, I will marry thee: and to that end, I have been with Sir Oliver Mar-text, the vicar of the next village; who hath promis'd to meet me in this the forest, and to couple us. Jaq. [Aside.] I would fain see this meeting. place of 490 Clo. Amen. A man may, if he were of a fearful heart, stagger in this attempt; for here we have no temple but the wood, no assembly but horn-beasts. But what though? Courage! As horns are odious, they are necessary. It is said, Many a man knows no end of his goods: right; many a man has good horns, T horns, and knows no end of them. Well, that is the dowry of his wife; 'tis none of his own getting. Horns? Even so :-Poor men alone?-No, no; the noblest deer hath them as huge as the rascal. Is the single man therefore blessed? No: as a wall'd town is more worthier than a village, so is the forehead of a married man more honourable than the bare brow of a bachelor: and by how much defence is better than no skill, so much is a horn more precious than to want. Enter Sir OLIVER MAR-TEXT. 506 Here comes sir Oliver :-Sir Oliver Mar-text; you are well met: Will you dispatch us here under this tree, or shall we go with you to your chapel ? Sir Oli. Is there none here to give the woman? 510 Jaq. [Discovering himself.] Proceed, proceed; I'll give her. Clo. Good even, good master What ye call't: How do you, sir? You are very well met: God'ild you for you last company : I am very glad to see you :Even a toy in hand here, sir: Nay; pray, be covered. Jaq. Will you be married, motley? 520 Clo. As the ox hath his bow, sir, the horse his curb, and the faulcon her beils, so man hath his de sires; and as pigeons bill, so wedlock would be nibling. Jaq. And will you, being a man of your breeding, be married under a bush, like a beggar? Get you to church, and have a good priest that can tell you what marriage is: this fellow will but join you together as they join wainscot; then one of will prove a shrunk pannel, and, like green timber, warp, warp. you 532 Clo. I am not in the mind but I were better to be married of him than of another: for he is not like to marry me well; and not being well married, it will be a good excuse for me hereafter to leave my wife. Jaq. Go thou with me, and let me counsel thee. We must be married, or we must live in bawdry. Not-O sweet Oliver, O brave Oliver, Leave me not behind thee; But-Wind away, Begone, I say, I will not to wedding with thee. 541 Sir Oli. 'Tis no matter; ne'er a fantastical knave of them all shall flout me out of my calling. [Exeunt. SCENE |